The Flaw
by ShinigamiMailJeevas
Summary: There was a belief that there were no consequences of using a Death Note other than the nothingness of Mu. But not even the shinigami could have predicted the true nature of the note; it creates a flaw into each who touches it. –MM. M for later on.
1. Prologue

**FULL Summary: **Everyone was led to believe that using a Death Note was safe, that there were no consequences other than the nothingness of Mu. Not even the shinigami could have predicted the true twisted nature of the notebook; the death note leaves a flaw in each and every person that touches it, regardless of ownership, but some flaws are worse than others. MM, **mpreg**.

**AN:** ok so yes, this is mpreg. I don't do, nor do I like, genderbender fics.

Seriously though, before you go 'ewww mpreg!' give the fic a chance. I promise it to be different than most, and hopefully I can pull off what I want. At least read until I give the REASON for 'it'. That's all I'm asking. After that if you still don't want to read that's fine. XD

BTW this was one of the things on my list of DN fic prompts to write XD.

**Suggested Listening**: Full Circle **by** Creed

~Prologue~

Mello grunted from the effort, knowing that he shouldn't have been lifting, even if it wasn't something all that heavy. He smirked slightly, knowing Matt would give him an earful once he saw the apartment as clean as it was.

Mello was cleaning when he was supposed to be 'resting'. Practically bed rest at that point… but it wasn't in his nature to simply sit down all day and do nothing; he would go out of his mind first. As it was, he was already antsy and wanting to do his normal amount of exercise, though he knew he couldn't, literally _couldn't_.

So he was reduced to housekeeping for entertainment. That and his laptop; but he could only watch so many movies on it before he wanted to throw it across the room just for a change.

Mello glanced at the clock as he gathered the last of the cleaning supplies and noted that Matt would be back with the food and groceries soon.

He resisted the urge to hum softly as he wiped down the counter, leaning more heavily on it as his feet hurt too much to ignore anymore, and sighed instead. Maybe he should have put on some music while he worked?

Mello finished the counter and washed his hands, not wanting to ingest any of the chemicals he'd worked with, and grit his teeth at the sudden pain that shot up from his feet to his spine. He bit his lip to keep a groan in and instead hobbled his way to the living room.

Easing himself into the arm chair he sighed contentedly as the pressure on his feet went away, and in turn lessened the pain in his back. They still ached of course, but the immediate discomfort had receded.

It was getting harder and harder to move around, and he found the amount of time he was able to be on his feet, or doing anything even remotely strenuous, was far shorter than he would have liked.

Heaving a sigh Mello rested a hand on his heavily swollen stomach and thought about just how he had gotten into that mess.

-End Prologue-

**AN**: well wasn't that wonderfully vague. But I'm sure everyone knows what Mello's problem is by now, I'm telling you though it wont be normal fic. If you have read anything from me before you know my brain is twisted into a knot and comes up with some crazy shit. I haven't seen anything like what's planned, and I'm not sure if I'm the first to come up with something like this (somehow I'm doubtful... there's a LOT of fics i haven't read XD) so I hope everyone will like it.

Chapters may or may not be long. It will basically be whatever i feel like as I'm not putting constrains on the length like I usually do. (so chapters may be short like they were in Guns & Gold, or long like in End Transmission)

This is also posted FAR before what I scheduled so don't expect quick updates until ET is complete.

Now that my AN of doom is over,

**review**?


	2. Part 1

**AN: **Happy early x-mas, your treat is an update. 

**Suggested Listening**: Bittersweet Sundown **by** Framing Hanley

Part 1

_~Notebook~_

"Mello eat your chocolate and be quiet already, we still have ten minutes before we even get there." Matt muttered harshly at the blond next to him. Mello, the blond in leather to his right, and Near, the albino like boy to his left, were on their way to help L, the world's greatest detective, with a case.

And had Matt not known how old Mello was he might have assumed he was a child with how he was acting. Matt understood that Mello practically worshiped the ground the mysterious detective walked on, assuming he even walked as they didn't know much about him, but when the blond got over excited he got.. annoying?

Ok, perhaps it was a bit less than annoying, but when it cut into his gaming time it made Matt not so happy. That and he had been listening to Mello blabber on about L for the last few days, ever since Roger had told them they were going.

"Mello!" he hissed slightly louder. He didn't like to shout or yell, having no good experiences with such loud tones, but speaking in his usually quiet manner hadn't done anything in gaining Mello's attention.

Mello paused, mid word, and stared at him with wide eyes. It wasn't often he got to that point of irritation, but when he did it made even Mello pause.

"What is your problem Matt, aren't you happy we get to work with L?" Mello had crossed his arms, a searching look on his features as though he were brushing past all of Matt's defenses to look into his mind. That look always made Matt uncomfortable; there were so many things that he would never even tell Mello...

"Not really. You know I've never cared all that much." he mumbled quietly, thumbs moving quickly over the buttons of the PSP.

"Then why are-"

"Because I've had to listen to you go on and on about the same stuff for the last three days. It's really fucking irritating." he sighed, pausing his game as Mello remained silent, and glanced up. Mello's expression was completely blank with the exception of his narrowed eyes.

"I see." was Mello's only response. The blond turned his gaze away and continued to sit in silence. The silence was nice, but Matt still couldn't concentrate. Not when Mello was acting like that.

It was what he would call a lose lose situation.

But he didn't want to deal with Mello should he not apologize, despite not having done anything wrong. Mello was worse than a woman on her period sometimes.

"I'm sorry alright?" he nudged Mello with his elbow gently and watched as the tenseness in Mello's posture was lost over a few minutes time.

"Fine.. I'll accept it... but honestly though, what's gotten you so out of sorts?" Mello questioned him, expression finally easier though mixed with curiously and if Matt read it correctly, a hint of worry.

"It's just all the traveling, you know I hate long rides.." he said barely above a whisper. It was really the only thing Mello knew about his past, and it guarantied him a get out of jail free card from Mello's anger when used. He didn't like having to mention it, as it lead to thinking about it, but from Mello's softening expression the subject would be dropped.

It wasn't as if Matt had lied really, but the long trip from England hadn't been the problem. Well, not the entire problem. He'd had a headache he couldn't shake for the last few hours, that stabbing pain one got behind ones eyes that made it feel as though someone was taking a melon baller and trying to scoop them out; that, and he'd had an odd feeling ever since he'd found out about the case.

They had no details on the case, and while that wasn't all that strange when in concerns with L, it bothered Matt how little they knew. Usually there was some random clue thrown to them to piece back to the rest of the information.

But this time they had been given nothing; perhaps it was because they would be seeing L in person but it still seemed off to Matt. It was like there was something they weren't being told about the case, and if the results didn't pan out, would never be told.

He didn't like it.

"If you both are done arguing I believe that we are here." Near's bland voice rose from Matt's other side and the redhead could actually say he had forgotten the younger boy was there. Near was fifteen years old but from his appearance, as well as the fact he played with toys constantly, he could easily be mistaken for someone of a lot younger age.

Mello sneered and viciously snapped off a piece of chocolate from the bar that had just appeared in Mello's gloved hand. "No one cares what you think, fucking twit..."

Let it be said, Mello and Near did not get along in any way shape or form. And it didn't help that at times Near went out of his way to provoke Mello, getting him into trouble, and ultimately insuring that Mello hated him. Though Matt wasn't sure if that had been the albinos original intention or not.

Whether or not Near had been fishing for a reaction, he was indeed correct. The car had paused in front of a rather grand looking building, a sky scraper really, and had begun its descent into an underground parking area.

The security there was tight, from what he could see Watari had to do fingerprint, voice and retinal scans to gain admittance for the car, and Matt wondered if they too would have to go through with something like that.

But as it turned out there was no need, as it was proof enough they were the three heirs simply by being with Watari. Matt figured such a lax in security would not be permitted for anyone else.

From his other side Mello stared with rapt attention, taking in every detail. Matt shook his head; the blond really was more obsessed than anything...

The moment the car pulled to a complete stop Mello didn't even wait for instructions and simply bolted from the car more like a five year old might rather than his seventeen years would call for.

Matt was less enthusiastic, though at least managed to be more animated than Near who for all the world appeared to be a puppet or android in his motions. A clone, a copy, nothing real. Matt could understand why Mello hated him, but he wasn't quite capable of it. Matt neither liked nor disliked Near, he was simply someone higher above him in the rankings and nothing more.

Mello had been that to him at one time as well. Just someone he shared space with. Funny how things worked out, he mused.

Watari told them they were going to meet L immediately and afterwards they would be served dinner, as it was quite late in the evening already. Matt wasn't even sure he was up to eating anything after all that travel.

They had to take an elevator up from the garage and Matt new Mello wasn't comfortable with it. It had to do with the things they never talked about. Why Matt hated to travel for long hours, and why Mello would unconsciously shake every time he stepped into an elevator.

Secrets.

Matt didn't call him on it though, and simply shifted until his back was pressed slightly against Mello's, which wasn't all that odd in the cramped box. He felt Mello's body twitch and quiver every few seconds and without even looking he knew Mello's fists would be clenched.

It always made him wonder what had happened but after the first time he knew he would never ask.

The second the doors slid open Mello's body froze, going completely lax.

"I've seen you before!" Mello gasped, surprise coloring his expression. Near had looked over, an emotion Matt couldn't decipher crossing his features briefly.

"Indeed you have Mello. It was at Wammys three Halloweens ago I believe." the man speaking was situated rather oddly in a chair, more crouched than slumped, and held a spoon between his thumb and index fingers as he ate a large sundae with lemon slices on top.

"Though I do believe it is not necessary at this point I will introduce myself, I am L."

Matt nearly stumbled as Mello rushed from the elevator; he had been leaning on the blond and was set off balance by the quick movements. Matt sighed and started the level over again as his character had just fallen into a pit, which might have been fine had there not been lava in it.

He walked calmly from the enclosed space, the last to do so, and left to stand off to the side; the furthest from the elevator but also in a position to survey all of the room. Though to most observers his attention would appear to be only on his game and nothing else. That was one of the things Matt loved about his goggles, they shielded his eyes. From everything.

Matt listened as they were told that everything they needed to know was in that notebook beside L. Near was closer and carefully picked it off the table and muttered 'Death Note?' aloud.

He got no further than opening the front cover before Mello ripped the notebook from his fragile grip. Near merely sighed as Mello grinned manically at him, holding the book above his head and taking a step back to read it. L simply watched all of it in silence and never once took his eyes from Mello's hands.

"Matt come take a look at this!"

And while Matt may have generally listened to Mello, for reasons he would not go into or ever explain, he would not move from his position against the wall. There was something about that notebook he didn't like, got a bad feeling from.

He wanted nothing to do with it.

And if it weren't for Mello, he might have simply walked out and found his own way back to Wammys simply to be rid of it; there was something abnormal about that little book, something that called out to him, made him want to pick it up, to touch it.

And that more than anything, worried him.

-End Part 1-

**AN**: I actually wrote this all in one go... Surprisingly... XD. Next part is in Mello's pov. Well... his 3rd pov. XD.

Thanks for all the reviews XD

**Special thanks to reviewers**: HannahFaps, Amour en Rayures, pandagirl77, Possessed4evr, kikyotwosoul, amos222, ambie-lee-smiley-chanX3, Kari Twilight Mist, schoolkid, ClOuDs-N-rAiNbOwS, chiakaiyuki, Miharu is Haruka's Love Child, 9shadowcat9, MsMattJeevas

Review?


	3. Part 2

**Suggested Listening**: September **by **Daughtry

Part 2

~Kira~

An odd feeling flooded through Mello the moment he had taken the notebook out of Near's hands. If asked, Mello knew that he wouldn't have been able to properly explain it. Just a feeling, like something moving through him, and yet it was also more than that...

Mello didn't concentrate on that though, instead intrigued by the words on the cover. Death Note.

"Matt come take a look at this!" he was aware that Near was looking at the book from beside him, but it was enough just to have possession of it.

The front cover held directions, a 'How to Use' page. Mello stared wide eyed at the writing. "The human whose name is written in this note shall...die?" he muttered softly. What the hell was it? L wouldn't play around concerning the investigation, Mello knew that much; and he wouldn't place false formation that was so obviously so, but it couldn't really work... could it?

And if it did, what case was it connected to, surely not a normal one. Wait, Mello thought to himself, was L letting them work on the-

"That notebook is a clue to the Kira case. I'm sure that at least two of you have worked at least that much out by now."

"Does it work?" Near questioned, fingers silently caressing the back cover. Mello didn't care what Near did so long as he could hold the notebook. It was almost as though Mello were being compelled to hold it, to read it.

"Yes." was L's only answer. He didn't need to say anything more; that was Kira's murder weapon, it was self explanatory.

L had asked for their assistance in the Kira case. Mello couldn't help the wide smile that tugged at his lips. He was excited; it was the case of the century perhaps of all of history and he was going to be working on it. Even if Mello had to share his time with L, and experience of the case, with Near it was well worth it.

They had done cases _for _L before but never with him.

L reached out a hand not too long later and plucked the notebook from Mello's hands; he didn't resist in the slightest.

"I believe it is time for the three of you to eat. Rest well tonight as you all have a lot of catching up to do in the morning." L told them in monotone, his hands being free and pushing away the not even half eaten ice cream.

Mello frowned, he had always heard that L was largely into sweets, and from that it didn't seem normal for the detective to push something like that away, unfinished. But it was merely conjecture on how much L loved sweets, so I was possible he had reached his limit for the day or something like that.

It wasn't something Mello would ask the detective either.

Watari gently urged them to leave the elder detective alone as requested, but Mello didn't budge as he waited for Matt, who slowly moved from his spot by the wall.

"Would you like to look it over quickly before you leave?" L asked Matt, but the gamer shook his head no and easily sidestepped the outstretched notebook. Mello gaped. How could Matt even think of denying L?

But he didn't think anything more on it as the smell of something chocolaty filled the air. "Hurry up Matt!" he growled, tugging on the gamers arm and led him away.

Their dinner had been exquisite and very tasty, nothing like the food of Wammys. It wasn't to say that Wammys House didn't provide well for its children, the children vying for their place as the next L, but sometimes things change was nice.

The same food choices day in and day out got old rather quick.

"What else did it say on the inside cover?" Matt asked him later, as they sat on their separate beds in the room they would be sharing. Mello was hardly surprised that Matt had known there was something more written on it.

As Mello explained the other few 'rules' he had been able to scan, he couldn't help but wonder just _why_ exactly Matt hadn't wanted to touch the notebook. It was more than ignoring L; it was about the book itself. Mello paused mid sentence and suddenly wondered if it had anything to do with the things they didn't talk about. But what could Matt's past have to do with a black notebook, that part didn't make sense.

"Mello?"

Having realized he'd paused for longer than expected he waved it away with a fake yawn, as though being tired made him scatterbrained. Matt eyed him in a disbelieving way but didn't say anything on the matter.

For that Mello was grateful, he didn't want to explain to Matt what he had actually been thinking. Mello would have, if asked, though he was certain Matt wouldn't have appreciated it. No Wammy kid did, not when it was about their past.

"It's been a long few days, we should sleep." Mello said tiredly; he really was tired, though he would have liked to stay awake longer and discuss the case with Matt. The redhead eyed him for a long moment before nodding his head, game turned off for the moment.

"'Night then." Matt called softly as he shut his light off and rolled over, safely under the covers. Mello wasn't sure, but it seemed as though he had offended Matt somewhere along the way, though he couldn't find anything he'd done to do so.

He frowned, lips pressed into a thin line. Matt wasn't usually like that, so easily bothered by things, so something must be on his mind. Something more than the case. But they were too old for Mello to simply go lie down beside him and cling to Matt until they either fell asleep or Matt spilled his thoughts; that had stopped when Mello had turned ten.

That was when Matt had started to have secrets.

Mello sighed softly and shut his own light, crawling under the covers and facing towards Matt. How had his thoughts drifted so far so fast? Wasn't he supposed to be thinking about the case, and L?

Mello bit his lip gently and forced his eyes shut. He needed rest, and that was it. Rest...and to get another look at that black notebook.

.

.

.

Matt hadn't been in the room when Mello had awoken that morning, nor had Mello seen him in the time it had taken the blond to get ready. Mello wasn't worried, of course not, but he did wonder where his friend was. Mello was... used to having him around. That was all.

So Mello was a little surprised to suddenly collide with the absent redhead the moment he opened the door.

"Matt, what the hell?" it had almost been as though the redhead had been standing there the entire time; but he couldn't have been as there was no reason for Matt to be in the hallway like that, or alone.

"You took a while to get up." Matt smirked at him, smoky breath reaching out.

Ah, Mello thought, that was probably the reason Matt hadn't been there. Despite Matt's most recent liking for those disgusting cancer sticks called cigarettes, Mello doubted Matt wanted to be caught with them in L's building.

Which was a shame, as Near was partially allergic to them.

"Have you eaten yet?" he asked Matt, who shook his head.

"L was waiting for you to get up first." Matt commented dryly and Mello felt his face flush.

They had been waiting on him? _L _had been _waiting _on him? Mello wasn't sure if he should feel mortified or pleased. He finally settled for something in the middle of the two emotions when he stepped into the same computer room as before to see L and Near seated and discussing something, Near's fingers gently touching the top of the notebook. There was something decidedly wrong with that scene, though Mello couldn't tell what.

"I see Mello finally decided to join us." Near commented, his voice being the only thing to acknowledge Mello's presence. Matt placed a hand on Mello's arm and the blond tensed, stopping himself from rushing over to the albino.

He hated Near. The brat could never mind his own business.

"Now that Mello is here I will have Watari bring breakfast and then I will tell you the terms of everyone being on the investigation." L commented, hand brushing across a stack of sugar cubes though never once putting one into his mouth. Mello didn't like how L had said 'terms' as though whatever it was was non negotiable.

Watari came in hardly five minutes after they had seated themselves. L had moved to the couch in the middle of the room, where Near sat beside him leaving Mello and Matt to sit together on the opposite cough with the coffee table in the middle. He hate how alike Near and L were, how much of a suck up the albino was.

Mello had to wonder if L would choose Near simply because of how similar they were, and it irritated him because he didn't want to change to become L. He wanted to be Mello and have the title of L. He was his own person and not a copy.

Not for the first time Mello thought that he understood just a little bit of what Beyond Birthday might have felt all those years ago when he had challenged L. Though what Beyond had done was definitely wrong and had landed him in jail to be picked off by Kira he had done it because of Wammys and because of L.

"Eat as I explain things to you." L ordered softly. Mello frowned as he took the plate of odd looking food into his lap. It was definitely not what he was used to but it would do. Food was food when one was hungry.

"For the duration of the case the thereof you will be here in this building with me unless there is a need of you to go outside." L said as he drank his tea black with no sugar or cream. Mello winced; he would only drink it if there was _at least_ one sugar and a tablespoon of milk. It tasted awful otherwise, bitter and overpowering.

"You will also keep up with your studies as well. For however long you had left in Wammys is however long you will be required to do so. Though with the four of us I do not believe it will be necessary. Expect to return to Wammys before all of your eighteenth birthdays."

Mello was taken aback by the sheer confidence L had that they would solve the case, despite the supernatural element to it. Though Mello supposed it was _L _so he had a right to be confident.

"For the next few days the three of you will familiarize yourself with the case as well as the contents of the notebook, after that you will begin to search along side me." L stated, just as blandly as he had started as he stirred his spoon through the inky tea.

"Things will go quickly after I finish reading the rules over, I will recite them for you and Matt." Near stated, holding the notebook up to his eyes in his odd copycat like way.

"No fucking way you will. Matt and I can read perfectly fine on our own, you can read it all you like but we wont learn anything if we have to listen to you drone on." Mello snarled, standing up and nearly knocking his plate to the ground, the only thing saving it had been Matt's quick gaming reflexes.

"Both of you please calm down and enjoy the meal Watari has provided. Mello and Matt will do their own separate research and Near will not bother them." L stated it as a fact, as though he never expected any of them to voice a protest against it, or disobey the command. And Mello wouldn't, he adored the mysterious detective.

All the children of Wammys did, and though Mello was hardly a child at seventeen years old, none of his affections had dwindled since meeting the raven haired man the night before. Mello sneered at Near, who almost smugly held the notebook, but sat back down. And as if being defiant Mello took a large bite of pancake and shoved it into his mouth.

Beside him, Matt shook his head, and from that Mello knew it was going to be a long, very long, case.

-End Part 2-

**AN:** yea I know, more boring stuff, but things will pick up quickly.

Also I have a new oneshot out called 'Like Gasoline' if anyone wants to check it out. :P

**Special thanks to reviewers**: Razorblade Devotchka, Possessed4evr, ambie-lee-smiley-chanX3, Holli-chan, HannahFaps, Kari Twilight Mist, pandagirl77, XxCatalinaxX, schoolkid, Seith, MsMattJeevas, Mrs. L Lawliet 162, Nikkiacatmeki


	4. Part 3

**Suggested Listening**: Devils & Angels **by** Toby Lightman

Part 3

~Unease~

"Mello may now use the notebook if he so wishes." Near said ever so blandly, holding out the notebook that was practically clenched in his small hand. It was odd, very much so, for the albino to hold something in that way, using more than just the tips of his fingers.

In fact, to Mello and Near had been acting rather oddly. Matt didn't want to believe that it was the notebook, but it _was _of supernatural origin. But if there was something up L would have known about it, so was there something else going on?

Matt wanted so bad to bring it up to Mello, but he saw the hungry look in the blond's eyes as he took hold of the notebook and began to scan its contents. There would be no discussion of anything for the moment. Not until Mello had read and reread everything a few times and committed it to memory.

And even then Matt knew it would be difficult, Mello had a one tract mind, and should he even slightly hint that L might be hiding something harmful to them... well Matt doubted he'd have to worry about talking to Mello anymore.

Mello was rather protective, obsessed?, when it came to L. Always had been.

"Matt do you want to take a look?" Mello asked, eyes peering at him through his blond locks. Mello, despite the seeming death grip on the notebook, gestured to Matt with it. There was no way in hell he was going to touch it until he found out what was really going on. He had never been paranoid, but notes of death hadn't been real before.

"I'll just read over your shoulder." Mello shrugged to him as he moved behind him and nearly rested his chin on the leather covered shoulder. Mello was taller than him, but thankfully not by too much.

He almost still couldn't believe it, that all those rules, everything in there, was made to kill people. 40 seconds and a heart attack... 6 minutes and 40 seconds to write out death specifics. It was taking some time to wrap his mind around it.

But, if that was a Death Note, then where was the shinigami attached to it, there had to be one right? It wasn't like it had just appeared one day... but then again, L hadn't told them where it had come from, or how he had gotten it. So maybe Matt had gone on too far of a limb.

L wasn't in the room with them anymore so there was no way for Matt to ask the detective until later, but it was something he would wonder about until then. He didn't want to bring it up to Mello in case it was a stupid question.

It was probably odd that he'd rather look stupid to L rater than Mello.

"It's unreal..." Mello muttered. Matt turned to look at him, slightly surprised.

"To have that kind of power... no wonder Kira used it." Mello's voice was raw, and almost dripped with envy. Matt didn't like it, not one bit. And despite that he made no move to take the murder notebook away, still couldn't bring himself to touch something like that.

"Mello, we've studied the note book enough why don't we move on?" he suggested instead. Mello narrowed his eyes at him and was silent. Matt sighed and stepped back after Mello clenched the note tighter in his grasp.

He continued to back up until he was a good few feet away; Mello's reactions were anything but normal and Matt knew for certain that it had to do with the notebook. Perhaps even why Kira became Kira.

"Matt?" Mello blinked slightly, as though he had zoned out, and dropped the book onto the table as it slipped from his grasp.

"I guess we could go over something else. I have already memorized the rules." Mello mumbled, sounding a bit shaky. It was unnerving to see Mello like that, and it didn't even seem as though Mello had realized it.

"Mello I think we should go see L.."

"No, he's busy, we'll see him when he lets us!" Mello was adamant, and Matt deflated a little. Mello listened to everything the detective said and if asked to jump off a bridge he probably would.

"Fine then, what are we doing now then?" he snapped. He needed a cigarette badly and Mello's odd behavior wasn't helping in the least. If anything it made it worse. But with Mello watching him so intently he doubted there was anything he could do at the moment.

"L hasn't told us anything about the case other than what we already knew, and the existence of the notebook. So we obviously have to find the rest on our own, and for that I'll need you." Mello's expression morphed into a cat-ate-the-canary grin that Matt knew all too well.

It was hacking time.

But at least Mello was acting more like his usual self. However odd that normally was.

"Get your laptop so we can get started." Mello ordered, giving the notebook one last look before stomping from the room, presumably to get more chocolate. Matt was just happy the notebook had stayed on the table. Maybe he was making too much out of nothing, maybe Mello was simply overtired.

It _had_ happened before...

He shook his head to clear his thoughts. Mello had requested something from him, and he knew something would end up thrown across the room if it wasn't completed. Mello may have been his friend, but when his temper got the best of him...

Matt was happy to find Mello sprawled across his bed, chocolate bar in mouth, when he arrived to get his laptop. "Hurry up Matt, I don't want Near to get ahead of me."

He withheld a sarcastic response, that Near would always be ahead of him because Mello was too hard to please, but kept it to himself as he would have gotten hit for it. He shook the mouse and the laptop was brought forth from its sleep, the screen slowly urning brighter and brighter.

Matt glanced over at Mello as if to say 'So what now, boss?'. The blond swiftly tossed his legs over the edge of the bed and was moving towards him before his feet had even touched the floor; he was beside Matt in seconds.

"Alright, I want you to search the Internet; sites, forums, whatever you can, to see if there is anything there, but do it on your own time. Right now I want you to hack into the NPA and the ICPO's databases to see if there are any clues there." Mello paused, as though weighing his thoughts.

"It might not give us anything big to work off of, but even something to help would be worth it." he mumbled, chocolate being shoved into his mouth at the last second. Matt nearly smiled, Mello had included him in it that time, using 'us' rather than 'me'. Matt didn't really care about Kira, as it had never affected him while they were at Wammys, but he liked to help Mello in whatever he did. Be it sneaking down to the kitchens to pilfer locked up chocolate bars or hacking.

Matt had never thought about life outside of Wammys, despite it being just around the corner, but he had always pictured it being him helping Mello out, no matter the circumstances. He supposed that was naive of him, and he hoped he wasn't proven wrong in his assumptions that Mello would want to take him along.

"Quit spacing out Matt." Mello snapped, voice close to his ear as he leaned over to view the screen.

"Sorry Mello." but really he wasn't.

He worked in silence, well other than the occasional snap and chomp as Mello ate his chocolate bar by bar, and let his fingers fly across the keys as he worked on the NPA's systems.

It didn't take him nearly as long as he'd thought, and he checked over the entire site to make sure there were no hidden traps before he slid out of the seat to let Mello take over. It was simply easier that way.

"We have about an hour, maybe an hour and a half before I have to find a new doorway into the system so I don't get caught." and really it was just a precautionary measure, but he didn't need to get another lecture from Roger about getting caught. Which had only been once, and back when he had first become interested in computers, but the old man always brought it up should there be even the most remote traces of a hack left; even if it hadn't been him he always got a talking to.

It was not only annoying but embarrassing. Like he was some inexperienced child. He played with the lighter in his pocket and shook his head, he supposed that it just couldn't be helped.

He read over Mello's shoulder as he had before, and Matt was thankful Mello didn't appear to be annoyed by it as it made it easier for Matt to follow along. The blond was silent for a long time, skimming through document after document and either sighing in irritation of letting out a soft hum or snort, though it was anyone's guess if something good had been discovered.

"Can we copy any of these?" Mello asked finally, nearly at the hour mark.

Matt said nothing and left to rummage through his suitcase. He had taken everything he possible could with him from Wammys, leaving only the CDs and extra games that just would absolutely not fit. He had all of his jump drives and hacking materials he needed for the difficult hacks, as well as spare jump drives for times like that when the copying of data was needed.

As he didn't know how much space would be needed he grabbed the one with the most storage capacity and inserted it into the laptop and leaned across Mello and made sure it was open and waiting for him.

"Just drag everything you want into that space and it will make a copy of it, though I'm sure you remember from last time." Matt added as Mello tended to get prickly when it sounded as though they doubted his knowledge.

Matt hoped that one day the blond might get over his complexes and see when people were only trying to be helpful rather than condescending. Matt figured that was a few good years away, at least.

But one could hope.

Mello began moving all the files and documents he wanted onto the flash drive, all the while Matt watched the time. It was over and hour and Matt was getting antsy. He needed to back out of the system or risk getting caught, but Mello was in the middle of things and he didn't want to interrupt.

Five minutes past.

Ten minutes past.

Matt's fingers began to twitch as Mello showed no signs of stopping. He hesitated; he could wait until his laptop gave him a warning that he was about to be caught, that someone was tracking him, but he didn't want to get that close if he didn't have to...

At nearly twenty past the hour Matt took hold of the mouse, Mello's hand still covering it, and closed out the flash drive despite the files still loading into it.

"Matt what are you-"

"It's almost been an hour and a half, that's the limit." Matt told him, though Mello already knew. Mello pursed his lips but when he didn't protest Matt backed out of the system, Mello's hand still under his as he maneuvered the mouse.

When Matt had finished Mello pulled his hand away, holding it as though he'd been burned. They both started as the door swung open gently revealing Near who stood there twisting a piece of hair between his fingers; though to Matt he looked a little strained.

"What the hell do you want Near?" Mello snarled, pushing Matt away as he stood up, fists balled. Mello, no matter how old he became, could never restrain himself when it came to Near. His anger always got the best of him, and Matt sometimes wondered what would happen if he completely snapped, lost control to such a degree that all rational was lost...

"I am here to gather Mello and Matt. Watari has made food." Near's fingers were practically ripping his hair from his skull, though Matt couldn't think of what might have made him so unsettled.

Mello stilled, hostility still evident in his posture, though his fists had unfurled and his back gone rigid. "I assume we won't be in the same place, so just show us there?" Matt spoke out before Mello could, knowing there would only be violence the longer Mello was forced to interact with Near.

Matt thought he saw Near's expression darken for a moment, but when he glanced over his features again they were the same save for the slight tension that had been present before. Near turned and left the room and though Mello made a tsk like noise he followed leaving Matt standing in the room by himself.

With a sigh he dislodged the jump drive and pocketed it. He didn't want to leave that lying around in such an obvious place. With a shake of his head Matt closed the laptops lid and hurried to follow Mello and Near.

He was thankful that Near wasn't one to hurry, and that Mello like to stay a few paces behind him, so they hadn't gotten too far.

Though the building was large, quite an understatement, it took hardly five minutes to get to the requested room. Watari was in there and had appeared to have set up a large meal as he'd waited. Matt doubted that Mello had even realized what time it was that food was necessary.

"Please enjoy the meal." Watari said, a clear order to sit and eat. Matt didn't mind much but wished it could have happened a little later so they could have finished the hack.

The entire meal went by almost silently, Near at his own end and him and Mello seated together at the other end. Mello was shoveling mouthfuls of food away and not bothering to hide the dark way he looked at Near.

Matt thought that it was the calmest meal the three of them had ever had together. Probably only because there was someone else there, otherwise Mello probably would have been at Near's throat.

"I have a message from L." Watari stated as he set out a small array of deserts before them. Mello instantly perked up making Matt roll his eyes.

"You are to complete all of this weeks lessons before continuing on with the case. If not then you will be penalized for each assignment not finished. Everything will have been sent to your laptops email."

Mello grit his teeth and Matt simply took it in. he never had any problems with the lessons, though he knew Mello would probably pull all nighters to get everything done quickly. That and make sure he understood the material. Watari was sure to provide them with the tests.

Mello scoffed down his chocolate desert, where he usually savored it, and Matt had just enough time to grab his plate as Mello dragged him from the room. Matt assumed Watari didn't mind him eating in the room as nothing was said, and he wasn't about to skip it simply because Mello wanted to leave.

.

Over the next few days all they did was lessons and assignments. It bored Matt as Mello had forbidden him from playing any games until he was done, said he didn't want Near to get ahead while he waited for Matt to get his act together. Though Matt knew that was absolute crap since Mello had other things he could do in the meantime.

Mello had also wanted him to study, once everything was finished, but after three days of nothing but work work work Matt picked up his gameboy and blatantly ignore the 'suggestion'. Though his attention had been far from locked onto the tiny screen at the time.

Mello had been acting oddly again, but different from whenever he was in contact with the murder notebook. He would rub at his stomach every few minutes and grimace in pain, and Matt had begun to wonder if the chocolate he was eating had come from a bad batch.

But Mello had never said anything about it since it began, practically a few hours after they had started that weeks lessons, so Matt kept it to himself, though he watched as Mello grew more uncomfortable as the days went on. He hoped it wasn't something serious, like a pending appendicitis or something equally bad.

"Matt make sure to get whatever files I missed the first time." Mello told him as he touched his stomach again while he sat in front of his laptop. It had been days since Matt first hacked the NPA and Mello had already told him to continue the hack on his own and copy anything useful onto the same jump drive.

Mello was slowly going over the previously copied files, having had them transferred to his laptop but so far they had not been able to discern anything more than Kira was in the Kanto region of Japan, a known fact, and that the task force had met L personally, and who had actually been staying with him more often than not, had practically disappeared off the face of the planet.

In fact Matt had just dug that piece up. There were no records of the men after a certain point in the investigation, though no main details about the case or the men were present, only that something happened and now it was back to L and Watari. It was as though someone had taken a whiteout pen and covered the rest of the document up, and that made Matt wary.

He put that under Mello's folder for 'important reads', meaning it would get read first and foremost. There was only one other thing in that folder on the jump drive.

Matt wished they had gotten an earlier start that day, being interrupted by dinner had made Matt start everything over again, though they could only work till a certain point.

Both he and Mello were getting tired, but not to the point where they couldn't function. They weren't left to their own devices though and had a 'lights out' time just as in Wammys. Matt supposed the only consolation for Mello was that Near had to abide by that as well.

Hardly an hour later there was a knock at the door. "You boys should have your lights out by now, make sure you do not take too long to get ready. I will be back in ten minutes." Watari's voice called through to them.

Mello groaned softly and with a frustrated sigh closed out the documents and shut his laptop down. "Hurry up Matt, we weren't given much time."

It didn't really make much of a difference to Matt as all he needed to do was strip down to his boxers, and he didn't need light for that. Mello was the one that took forever. The blond was still scrambling around when Matt shut the lights off at nine minutes and ten seconds later.

He rolled his eyes as Mello cursed, having collided with something. "Nite Mello." he called out as he rolled over. He heard the muttered response, a soft 'goodnight Matt, dammit where the hell-'

Matt smiled softly and closed his eyes. While he wasn't tired, if he didn't do something to keep his mind occupied he would eventually fall asleep. He drifted off to Mello getting settled.

And he woke up to Mello yelling and sounding generally freaked out. The lights were already on and Mello was staring in horror at the blood on his sheets. Matt's day had gone to hell before it had even really begun.

_-End part 3-_

**AN:** What a doosy... this fic is killing me. It's taking waaaaaaaay too long to complete chapters. This one took me a week. A WEEK. *facepalm*

**Special thanks to reviewers**: XxCatalinaxX  
Mercory  
Mrs. L Lawliet 162  
schoolkid  
xKittySora  
Aeleita  
Kari Twilight Mist  
Possessed4evr  
pandagirl77

review?


	5. Part 4

**Disclaimer: **still dont own

**Suggested Listening**: The Catalyst **by** Linkin Park (ONLY good song on new cd)

Part 4

~Shock~

Mello was still trying to process what he was seeing, the pain he was feeling in his lower abdomen, when Matt picked him up into his arms. He didn't even think to protest, a little more than panicked, as Matt started yelling for Watari or L, whoever was closest.

He was taken to their own medical ward and a doctor was called, one on L's payroll.

Mello had nothing to tell them about what could have caused the bleeding, and there didn't seem to be anything obvious wrong either, but then Matt spoke up about the discomfort and pain Mello had been feeling for the last few days and the doctor listened raptly. Mello hadn't even thought of it.

There were no internal injuries, bleeding or otherwise, nothing had burst and when it appeared that Mello wasn't about to die from bloodless or anything immediate of the sort things slowed down to a less frantic pace, one that his foggy mind could actually follow.

There was test after test but there seemed to be nothing wrong with him. Nothing that would cause blood to...

Mello prided himself on not being afraid of really anything, but what was happening scared the hell out of him. It wasn't normal, no where near normal, and he was happy to have had Matt take charge. Though he'd never admit it.

Matt had stayed with him the entire time all the tests were going on and despite the embarrassment of the situation he appreciated it. The one thing he hadn't appreciated, was having everyone else in the room along with him, especially Near.

That damn albino just stood there in the corner and stared at him with his large blank eyes, as though he was enjoying the situation. Though Mello wouldn't be surprised if he was, that little bastard...

"Alright, I am going to request that everyone please leave the room. I can't get accurate results if his heart rate and blood pressure are increasing because of you."

Mello stared thoughtfully at the doctor; Mello hadn't thought he'd been that obvious, though it might have had something to do with the angry lurch his heart made every time he glanced at Near... damn heart monitor didn't let him hide his discomfort.

Mello shrank further back into the bed as Matt hesitated; he really didn't want the redhead to leave and he almost sighed in relief as Matt stayed seated despite the doctor eying him expectantly.

"He can stay." Mello muttered and ignored the smile directed his way. It shouldn't have been surprising that his best friend calmed him down, and yet in a way, it was.

"Alright, I'm going to do an Ultrasound. While there doesn't seem to be any trace of tumors or abnormal growths I can't rule them out and using the ultrasound will give me a better look." the doctor told him reassuringly; he was an older gentleman though not as old as Watari nor quite as young as L.

And despite him having been genuinely nice the entire time, Mello hated being treated like he were ten rather than seventeen. Yes he was freaked out, but that didn't mean he wasn't intelligent enough to know what an Ultrasound did. He didn't comment on it though.

Nor did Mello think it was odd for L to have one of those machines in the medical ward. L spared no expense with that floor, and had just about every possible thing a doctor or technician could want. Just about meaning that Mello hadn't seen an MRI machine in the place yet, though after this he expected one to be flown in.

Mello flinched as his shirt was pushed back, slacks already low on his hips, and his stomach assaulted by the cold gel. He watched, eyes transfixed, as the device was rolled over his flat stomach, though it was uncomfortable and put pressure where it hurt.

The screen wasn't facing his way so he couldn't tell what the 'hmm' and 'I thought so...' meant. It made that unfamiliar spark of fear race through him and even Matt's hand on his arm didn't help. Doctors were all about the patient, and yet it seemed they did all they could to make patients uncomfortable.

The doctor wiped the gel from Mello's stomach gently and Mello yanked his shirt back down as the man stood up. "I will be back in one moment." the doctor said with a smile as he stood and swiftly walked from the room, though Mello could hear his voice from just outside the door. He couldn't shake the feeling that it was bad news.

"You'll be fine Mello." Matt told him, as though he had read his thoughts. Mello nodded mutely but knew that only the results would show if that were true or not.

Hardly a second later everyone who had been booted from the room was back, though Near stayed by the doorway, far enough away where Mello wasn't as tempted to throw something at him. Too bad too as all the closest things were nice and pointy.

"I wanted all of you to be here for this, as it didn't make any sense to tell you separately."

"What is Mello's diagnosis?" Watari asked, though Mello wished he could have formed the words himself.

"It appears that you Mello, are on your period." there was dead silence after the doctor had said it and Mello felt for sure it was some sort of sick joke and yet no one was laughing.

"E-excuse me?" he managed to stutter out. There was no way- that man had to be mistaken!

"I said you are on your period." the older man said gently.

"I heard that part! But it's impossible, I'm a guy. And believe it or not I paid attention in class and I most certainly do not have the female parts necessary to get that..!" he snarled but quietened as Matt nudged his side.

"Actually, you do." the doctor said with a bit of a wince.

Mello's jaw dropped. "What? Since when?" he had... he had...

"Here, let me show you." the doctor lifted Mello's shirt again, Mello more than sufficiently subdued, and put more of that obscenely cold gel on his stomach and rolled it around as a picture began to show on the screen. He showed them what he had theorized after some of the tests showed and odd amount of hormones that should not be present in a normal male.

He had a uterus. He had a fucking uterus that Mello _knew_ hadn't been there before.

"It is looks relatively normal doesn't appear to be harming you in any way. You were born with this and probably acquired from an unborn twin while you were still a fetus. I would say that despite no prior indication of this, the pain you have been feeling the last few days was probably the premenstrual side effects and your body adjusting to the changes for the first cycle."

Mello honestly felt as though he were having a nightmare, the only problem being he couldn't wake up from it.

"I suggest getting in contact with a specialist. This sort of thing is far beyond my knowledge. You would be better off with someone trained in that area." Mello didn't want to hear that. And he most certainly didn't want to be talked to by someone who specialized in parts he shouldn't even have!

"You will also need some sort of pad or other absorbent fabric that will absorb the blood before it gets onto your clothing. You may have to adjust whatever you buy as they are made for women, not men."

Mello simply sat there, letting his mind soak up the information. He vaguely heard L suggest that he use a few moments to take in everything before they all met up in the computer room. Mello didn't know why L wanted to meet, and for once, didn't really care.

Mello looked forlornly at the doctor, doubting that the man would be able to answer any of the questions that suddenly burned in his mind. Hell, Mello doubted anyone could answer them.

"Mello?"

Matt's voice suddenly cut into his thoughts and he had forgotten the redhead was there with how utterly quiet he was. No games were pulled out and his goggles had been pushed to the top of his head. Mello titled his head to the side, not up to having to speak quite yet. He would get used to it, he would have to until he figured out if there was something he could do about it, but he needed time...

"Um... you're bleeding through..." Matt trailed off, looking uncomfortable. Mello groaned as he looked down. He had indeed 'bled through' the material given to him earlier. What a fucking disgusting problem.

"Can you see if anyone decided to get anything to stop this?" he waved to his lower half, face heated in embarrassment despite the need to voice the question. Matt looked more than happy to leave for the moment, but Mello knew not to be offended. It was a very... odd situation.

He let his head flop to the pillow with a sigh of resignation. The motion sent a wave of pain up from his pelvic area and he groaned, turning to his side a little and cradling his stomach as though it would help.

Mello remembered some of the horror stories the girls had gossiped with each other about, reasons to skip class and stay in bed all day. He had thought they were just lazy and used it as an excuse. But damn did it hurt!

The pain had steadily been increasing, like someone was scraping a knife along his insides...it was hardly a pleasant feeling. "Hey Mello, apparently Watari went out to get you something-Mello?"

Mello opened his eyes, having only just closed them as the knife feeling kicked up a notch, and caught sight of Matt's concern. The redhead must not have been paying attention as his face was generally expressionless if he could help it. Mello had no idea why Matt was so hung up on not showing emotions and he'd always filed it away as something in the 'things we don't talk about' category.

"Hopefully he'll be back soon." Mello muttered, completely ignoring Matt's concern.

"Mello-" Matt's tone held a warning and Mello grimaced.

"I'm fine." he said shortly. He didn't like to show any weakness if he could help it, even to Matt. So despite the pain pulling at him he grinned. Matt's less than pleased frown said he didn't believe him, though Matt stayed silent.

"I was really only trying to sleep-"

"Keep lying Mello." Matt told him. Mello sighed again. He really didn't want to deal with an angry Matt on top of everything else. For all their smarts, Mello thought they acted incredibly immature at times...

"It only hurts a little..." he mumbled finally, hardly liking the dark look on Matt's face and wanting it gone.

"You could probably get something for it, girls must have something they can take-"

"I'm not a girl, Matt!" how could Matt even suggest-

"I know you're not a girl. I've walked in on you changing too many times not to know that, but you do have a rather girly problem at the moment and if you can ease the pain then you should do so. Holding it in until you pass out or something isn't going to make you 'macho'." Matt smirked at him and Mello hid his face in the pillow.

Oh how Matt had to remind him of those times. It had been so awkward between the two of them afterwards. But Mello wouldn't completely fault Matt; it wasn't the gamer's fault he'd forgotten to lock the bathroom door as he stripped.

"Boys." a soft voice called out in greeting, it made Mello jump slightly as he hadn't heard anyone come in. Watari stood a few feet over with two bags in his hands, two bags that Mello assumed contained things that were now his.

"When you are finished please meet with L in the designated location." Watari inclined his head slightly as he handed over the bags to Matt, who had reached out, before leaving them as quickly as he had appeared.

"You can make it to the bathroom alright by yourself?" Matt asked. Mello flushed in anger and snatched the bags from Matt's grip.

"Yes." he hissed and pretended he hadn't seen the flash of hurt in Matt's eyes. Throwing his legs over the side Mello gripped the material closer to him careful not to let it slip. He felt Matt's eyes following him and hobbled along. He didn't care if the girls had to deal with it most of their life, he wanted it _gone_.

Mello shut the bathrooms door and locked it. He was more than happy there was a bathroom just outside the main entrance to the ward, he as it didn't require him to walk through the hallway as he was.

With a frown he pulled the clothy material away from himself and used the clean portions to wash himself down. He was disgusted by the entire process and somehow knew he would become entirely too familiar with it.

Mello dumped the contents of the first bag onto the counter, the one that had felt squishy, and frowned at the clothing. He certainly couldn't stay in what he was wearing, but black sweatpants and t-shirt? He hadn't worn anything like that in years...

He'd have to see if any of Matt's jeans would fit him; they were usually too big for him but with a belt they would be alright. Mello shifted the other bag onto the counter, not knowing what to expect.

Mello stared at the contents blankly.

Adult diapers.

Just. Fucking. Wonderful.

He sighed in defeat, feeling a little more than degraded, but redressed himself accordingly. He could not let Matt see those...ever.

With the soiled clothing shoved into the other bag, and it tied tightly together, Mello hesitantly left the bathroom to find Matt waiting patiently a few feet away. He smiled slightly at him, but couldn't manage anything more.

It was time to meet with L.

But for once, Mello was dreading it.

-End Part 4-

**AN**: so apparently I've intrigued quite a few people with this, so I hope I can live up to all the hype. So yeah, Mello can now actually PMS on people XD

Don't worry, the good stuff will come soon. Heh.

**Special thanks**: Miharu is Haruka's Love Child, Possessed4evr, xKittySora, pandagirl77, Kari Twilight Mist, kikyotwosoul, Mrs. L Lawliet 162, Aeleita, XxCatalinaxX, amos222, Deadly Nightshade1395, schoolkid, Amour en Rayures, MsMattJeevas

Feedback please? Comments or suggestions will be appreciated.


	6. Part 5

Part 5

~Test~

"Mello is finally here, did Mello have a crying fit that prevented him from hurrying?" Near deadpanned from his position beside L, who had hardly done more than blink owlishly at the comment.

Matt had no idea what the hell had gotten into Near as of late but he knew enough to hold Mello back from attacking. Though he did so carefully as he didn't want to add any injuries to Mello's already bad day. Under his grip he could feel Mello shaking in rage.

"Just because I'm apparently on my period doesn't mean I have an excess of hormones running through my body to make me do something like that!" Mello snapped, though he at least hadn't pulled against Matt's grasp. He glared fiercely at Near, practically snarling, but stayed still.

"Oh? So that is normal for you? My mistake." Near's fingers were clenched in his hair yet his expression hadn't changed in the least. There was something more going on there than just Mello's...period.

"You-"

"Near, do you know what PMS stands for, more so in this case than anywhere else?" L interjected as he reached for a cookie only to drop his hand and take a lemon wedge.

Near looked carefully at L, gaze strong as he was silent.

"When in concerns to Mello I believe it stand for 'Possible Murder Suspect'. Near you should watch how you treat Mello."

Matt gaped. He couldn't believe L had said that it was too... amusing.

"Now that everyone is here, I believe it is time to tell you some information about the Kira case and the Death Note now that my theories have been proven to me. I will ask that you do not interrupt me."

From L's tone, Matt knew that he was not going to like whatever was going to be said.

Matt lead Mello over to the couch opposite of L and Near, the latter sitting on the floor beside the other couch, but quickly released Mello's arm when the sat down. Mello was oddly silent and though it bothered Matt that Mello had been subdued so quickly he let his attention drift back to L.

"I will begin with telling you the event which led up to your involvement in the case. The main suspect, a man by the name of Light Yagami, who was also helping with the investigation on the off chance that he was not Kira, disappeared one day leaving absolutely no trace of where he had gone."

L's hand hesitated before picking up some of the sliced limes in front of him and carefully eating the fruits flesh.

"I believe his disappearance was directly correlated with his dwindling sanity. He had begun to exhibit very slight symptoms of MPD and Bi Polar disorder which were not present at the time I met him, or were not as pronounced. He was also at a high level of intelligence and a highly skilled actor."

L paused, an eerie expression sliding across his face as he sucked on another lime. "I believe his condition was caused by simply touching the notebook, rather than him owning it if he did indeed."

Matt's mouth was dry. The notebook was the cause of it? Or at least that L believed it was... but then why would he-

"I decided to see if my deduction was indeed correct by having the three of you in contact with the notebook. Results would be obvious as your personalities and actions are so well defined. Though I could not have guessed that the notebook could alter more than psychological and nutritional aspects of the body."

Matt couldn't believe the words coming out of L's mouth. The detective had actual used them as guinea pigs? Just to prove something to himself... Matt glanced at Mello and noticed the absolute rigidness of his posture. Mello looked up to L, practically worshiped him...the news must hurt him.

"I myself have experienced side effects. I can no longer eat the sugar I used to crave. It has begun to make me physically ill. I also seem to have developed a severe lack of Iron and generally crave food high in Iron content instead, though it appears citrus is also appreciated." L commented with an almost shrug, as though he were wholly unconcerned with the situation.

And perhaps he was, Matt didn't know, all he was certain about was how hurt Mello must be.

"Now that I am positive, I will tell you my theory on the Death Note. The Death Note leaves a mark on each and every person that touches it, as well as a lingering connection that makes those who have touched it wish to be around it and hold it and eventually pushes them to use it if in constant contact regardless of ownership. I believe we all know what marks it can leave?"

Mello's fists were balled and teeth clenched but he didn't shout or snarl or do anything to L. Matt rolled his eyes despite his concern for the blond; of course Mello wouldn't lash out at L.

L could probably be Kira and the blond would forgive him.

"Why hasn't Matt shown any side effects?" Mello questioned, eyes flickering in Matt's direction. Though it wasn't anger or suspicion he saw in his blue eyes, more like...relief?

"Because Matt is the only one who has not touched the notebook." L commented, this time reaching for a lemon with some sort of black powdery substance on it.

"And Near?" Mello almost growled.

"Not any physical ones..." L muttered, mouth full of lemon. And Matt knew what the detective meant. Near, who had always been practically emotionless, internalizing everything, had begun to act almost vicious and tense. Pulling at his hair despite his calm facade.

Matt wondered if there was some sort of pattern. If the First Kira had mental problems and then L had his physical need for Iron... then Mello's period and ...

But he stopped there. Near had taken hold of the notebook first. So if going by a pattern Near should have had some sort of physical reaction, not Mello. Maybe there was no pattern. Just a randomization of symptoms only limited by the notes supernatural power. It was a chilling thought.

"I also believe that some of the effects are gradual. My loss of liking and sudden craving for Iron and citrus had started months ago. It was not as though the thought that I dislike sweets suddenly popped into my brain one moment."

"I think I'll keep this damn period rather than loose my chocolate..." Mello grumbled quietly and Matt had to hold back a laugh; it was a truly Mello statement.

"Is there anything else that we need to know, that you haven't told us yet?" Matt decided to ask, rather than risk laughing, not that he would have...

L eyed him for a moment, continuing to eat lemons, before he dropped his gaze. "Nothing that I'm willing to tell you."

That, in Matt's opinion, cemented just how little L could be trusted. But Matt wondered if the other two would see it that way, for what it was, or just as another test to be passed. If Matt had to bet, he would have put all his money on the latter.

Sure Mello and perhaps even Near might be hurt or angry about being used as test subjects in L's theory but after all the years of blind obedience and determination to become him, to become the letter, Matt doubted it would vanish even if L outright admitted that he cared for little more than things to sate his curiosity.

Which Matt was beginning to think that was what everything was about. If the Death Note really could twist people using their core fundamentals, just how far could it twist and remake someone at genius level intelligence, someone like Kira, like...L?

Or Near, or Mello?

Matt for the first time, had begun to realize just how dangerous that supernatural book was. They hadn't made it, so how could they ever fully understand it? Did the shinigami that carried it even know everything? Did the shinigami know how it had come into existence?

Those were the things he wanted to ask L... but Matt wasn't so sure he should ask the detective anymore, if the previous test was anything to go on. What else might he decide to...test?

No...he would simply have to research it on his own. He needed this 'Light Yagami's full history to start with, but it would have to wait until later.

"Excuse me, but I haven't gotten to finish sleeping thanks to…everything. I'm leaving to get some rest." Mello mumbled, sounding warn out and emotionless. Mello was anything but emotionless, so it worried Matt not to hear anything, even anger, in his friends tone.

He swore silently as Mello stood stiffly and walked from the room. Matt didn't say anything of a goodbye to those in the room and simply followed Mello as the blond slowly made his way to their room.

Matt was more than relieved upon entering, to see that Mello's bedding had been changed and replaced. He didn't think he could handle actually seeing the blood in person again; it being in his memories was bad enough.

He hadn't been that afraid since he was a child... leave it to Mello to do that to him.

Mello had taken one of the plastic bags from the medical floor and had kept it by his side until he reached the inside of the room where he proceeded to throw it across the room with a small guttural sound.

His teeth were clenched and his fists balled at his sides as his chest heaved in mouthfuls of air. Matt hated seeing him like that, had seen it far too often at Wammys, which already seemed like a century ago.

"Fuck.." all the anger went out of Mello like flipping a switch and his pallor was sudden ghost white and he clutched at his stomach as though someone had kicked him, leaning on the bed as he did so.

Matt had no idea what was going on, but decided it was most definitely related to Mello's 'problem'. Which Matt had no idea how to fix other than to give him something for the pain. Which incidentally, he had on hand.

Matt didn't know if it would have any effect, but it was for aches and pains... Matt supposed it had to count for something.

He left Mello as he was and instead dug around his bags for the small bottle he always kept with him. Mello didn't know it and Matt never told him but he sometimes got rather...intense migraines. It was a byproduct of a part of his past he'd rather forget, yet by the simple act of pain flooding through his skull remembered day in and day out sometimes.

He clutched the small bottle between his fingers and twisted the cap to take out one pill. He hoped it would be enough until Matt could get something else from the Medical floor. Or something was prescribed for him should the pain continue.

Matt grabbed his leftover bottle of water and held both out to the blond who, without even stopping to look at it, popped the pill into his mouth and guzzled the rest of the water. Matt smiled slightly and took the empty plastic from Mello's loose grasp.

Mello didn't appear to want to move but Matt knew it couldn't be comfortable to stay like that so he carefully guided Mello to the bed despite the dirty look thrown his way. Honestly, Mello could be such a baby at times.

"You want anything Mello, other than Near's head on a platter?" Matt grinned as the dark look fell from Mello's expression and his lips twitched into a crooked smile marred only by pain. It was... breathtaking.

"My laptop? There is no way I'll be able to sleep..." Mello trailed off but the slight grimace and the way he curled in on himself the slightest bit more made Matt understand. He supposed that if one weren't used to it, the pain would definitely be difficult to deal with. Then again...did one ever really get used to pain?

"Alright." Matt sighed. He could already see the dark circles under the blond's eyes, but if Mello wanted to work, Matt wouldn't stop him.

But he wouldn't let Mello do it alone. If Mello didn't sleep, than neither did Matt. He set the laptop in front of Mello before gently sitting on the bed beside him, laptop on his knees. It was a countdown now, a countdown to see who would fail first and succumb to sleep.

And Matt hoped it was Mello, because he knew the both of them needed the rest.

-End part 5-

**AN**: so I hope people are enjoying this so far…. And I'm sorry for being so late but ive been so damn tired lately *going through my insomnia phase again* and I just haven't wanted to do anything XD

Also, those who read Bingo Daubers and I Love You's I finally typed up chapter three so once I edit it I'll post.

**Special thanks to reviewers**: CharizardCyndi, Aeleita, pandagirl77, Mrs. L Lawliet 162, XxCatalinaxX, Possessed4evr, MsMattJeevas, Kari Twilight Mist, Amour en Rayures, schoolkid, xKittySora, Deadly Nightshade1395, Miharu is Haruka's Love Child


	7. Part 6

Part 6

~Justice~

Mello was a little surprised when Matt sat down beside him on the bed after he'd brought the requested laptop over. Matt's own laptop sat on his knees as the redhead sat himself nearest the edge without falling over; Mello didn't care, he wasn't in the mood to protest, at least that's what he told himself.

It didn't help that he felt the slightest bit calmer with the redhead so close...

He withheld a tiny sigh at the thought and sent his mind in a different direction. The medication Matt had given him. Mello wondered where Matt had gotten them as he couldn't recall seeing Matt ever need anything like them back at Wammys. It made him curious but he wouldn't ask just in case it was related to one of the subjects they didn't talk about.

Mello shifted so that he was propped onto an elbow with a better view of the laptops screen but winced as the motion was more than enough to jar his lower half; it brought everything back into focus.

He was sore and his lower abdomen hurt, a throbbing annoying sort of pain. The kind that you think might dissipate after every throb is over only to be disappointed over and over. But the worst part was the feeling much deeper inside him, almost as though it were behind his genitals, the feeling like someone was taking a knife and scrapping his insides with it. It _hurt_. It was a different sort of physical pain than what he was used to.

He knew the pain of split knuckles from when he had punched something too hard, he _knew_ the feeling of a black eye and the swollen tenderness it left behind when the sharp pains had faded, hell even the feeling of his lip splitting apart from being hit too hard from one of the teens he'd fought. But nothing compared to that.

To the thing he wasn't ever supposed to have had, or been _able_ to have.

And L... his chest clenched tightly like someone's fist squeezing around his inner organs. L had used them with little regard for their health. What if one of them had ended up like the Kira suspect, if the compulsion to use the notebook was true?

Would L have simply written it off as a casualty and taken them down when things got bad?

Or would he have tried to correct his mistake in judgment, because that was exactly what it had been. A mistake... right?

L was justice... and justice was... justice was human. Justice was flawed... imperfect. But still right...

Mello just couldn't believe that L ...

Mello shook his head. He was simply tired and in pain, he needed to focus on something else. Pain plus pain did not equal euphoria no matter how many times in mathematics a negative and a negative equaled a positive.

So he set to work on the files that Matt had gathered prior to L's little revelation. He needed to go through it and see if any of it was salvageable. He really had no other motivation to work, but as sleep was elusive for the moment there was no other choice.

Mello quickly pulled up the folder he'd copied from Matt's jump drive and began to skim the information. Most of it was useless despite the promise it held when first obtained and even the ones he'd looked at before were now utter junk. They'd wasted so much time because L had withheld information..

Mello suppressed the urge to simply throw his laptop off the bed and instead continued to dig through the mostly useless data. It was more than frustrating to have wasted, even that seemingly small amount of time, the effort in getting the information when they could have been so much further into the case-

Mello paused his hand, nearly hitting the delete button on that file, when he read something that intrigued him. It was contained in one of the files Matt had to have placed on his laptop without his knowing; there was no other who knew the password to get on.

It was about L's previous investigation team and how they had up and disappeared, or so it seemed. Mello began to wonder. Did Kira have anything to do with it? Had Kira gotten rid of them before he'd thought to disappear, spurred on by his ever growing madness, or was it simply a last ditch effort to erase those who knew him as Kira, those other than L?

Or had the previous team been equally affected by the notebook and things had unraveled from there and lead to their disappearance? But if that were the truth why was it not documented in the file or anywhere else?

They, like Light Yagami, had simply vanished.

It left Mello with only more questions. He huffed in frustration but didn't bother to ask Matt of his opinion, it was likely those thoughts were the very reason Matt had given him the file in the first place.

Mello saved that file into a new folder rather than deleting it. One he would use for a separate part of the investigation, one separate for finding Kira. With that in mind Mello looked more closely at the rest of the documents in his possession, searching for even the barest hint that would help him.

Mello didn't remember falling asleep, but he knew the second that he woke with the heaviness of having been deep asleep. He opened his eyes and started a little at finding Matt's face so close to his, both of them sharing one pillow.

Their laptops were gone from the bed and placed safely on Matt's unused one. Mello smiled softly as he curled more fully underneath the blanket that was strewn over them; Matt must have stopped working not too long after he'd fallen asleep, probably afraid of waking him from the typing. It was unexpected, but nice.

It was warm and sleep still clung to him. It was more than an incentive to close his eyes again, slight smile staying as Mello allowed himself to fall back asleep.

.

Mello woke up to a soft curse, hardly a whisper but still loud enough to rouse him from his light sleep. He blinked heavily, feeling more content than tired as he glanced at the numbers on the clock. They danced back and forth under his gaze until his eyesight steadied. He had slept for another three hours.

Mello made no movement as he dragged his eyes to the body still lying next to him. Matt had his gameboy color in hand, the oldest model handheld Matt had, and his fingers were working overtime and mashing buttons.

When Matt finally caught note of him being awake he frowned; Mello wasn't quite sure what to make of that.

"Did I wake you?" Matt asked looking a little guilty as he paused his game. Mello withheld the smile that twitched at his lips. Matt almost never paused his games willingly.

"You did-" Mello watched as Matt's expression fell and quickly continued, he really didn't want to start the day off wrong by creating tension between them, "-but if I had slept much longer I would have been sick. You know I don't sleep all that much."

"You ever think that you're getting sick because you don't sleep enough?" Matt commented dryly though he seemed mollified on the previous subject.

"No." Mello stated simply. He would not believe that were true. L could go without sleep and had previously eaten nothing but sweets so Mello would be able to handle the small amount of rest he received.

His stomach grumbled angrily and Mello instinctively curled in on himself, hand going to his stomach as if it would help. Mello wisely grit his teeth and it helped to distract him from the pain.

Damn it when would this hell be over?

"Mello, do you need more of those meds? It's been long enough where you can take more if you wanted..." Matt trailed off and though Mello didn't want to get used to taking them he also really didn't want to feel like that all day so he nodded.

He pulled the blanket tighter over himself as Matt slipped from the bed and back to the hidden bottle in his things. Though Mello would never tell the redhead...he missed his warmth beside him and wanted nothing more than for Matt to get back into the bed.

Mello sighed softly.

Things could never be simple for him, could they?

-End Part 6-

**AN**: Yeah… I'm kind of late in updating… and I really have no excuse other than I was lazy and the weather is making me tired….. heh. But on another note I'm happy that everyone seems to be enjoying this. Next chapter will be _interesting_.

**Special thanks: **XxCatalinaxX, Possessed4evr, pandagirl77, CharizardCyndi, Aeleita, MsMattJeevas, Mercory, Kari Twilight Mist

Review?


	8. Part 7

**AN:** Yes, normally this would be Matt's chapter but with what I had planned, and the short length of the previous one, it was necessary. So you will just have to deal with Mello again, don't worry, Matt will be back next chappy XD

I suggest Listening to the second song about two-thirds of the way down, just after Mello has his 'chocolate'. Works well for the scenes afterwards XD

Also, **I have a new poll**… it deals with what story I will write next after my sort of secret project *which has recently been added to my profile XD*

**Suggested Listening**: Afterlife** by** Bush; Hot Issue (remix) **by **4 Minutes; Porn Star Dancing **by **My Darkest Days (ft Chad Kroger & Ludacris)

Part 7

~Red light~

Nothing, it seemed, would be easy for Mello.

And Mello supposed that he had tempted fate with his earlier misgivings. It had become apparent that he would not be so lucky to get a small three or four day period. Not at all.

Here it was, edging on day six, and Mello was ready to throw something across the room...again.

Since the day, actually late afternoon, he had woken up with Matt playing the gameboy on his bed, things had progressively gotten worse. He would have given almost anything to go back to the tiny insignificant amount of discomfort he'd felt then, because compared to how he had felt then to the present, he had not experienced pain.

Worse pain, forget someone taking a paring knife to his insides it was more like a hack-saw, and bloating and his slightly over balanced emotion he was sick of it. Sick of lying around like an invalid, sick of being in pain and it not going away and sick of having to constantly having _think _about it.

He had pulled on his leather trousers, vest and shoved his boots on before he trudged over to L.

He had informed L that he _would_ be going somewhere for the night, whether the detective liked it or not, and that he would be back before morning. Hopefully. L had merely stared blankly at him as he ate a lemon, probably wondering when Mello had grown the balls to demand something of him.

Mello was certain that when he wasn't feeling like crap, as that fucking period had better go away, or feeling overtired that he would kick himself for acting that way to L. But for the moment...for the moment, he just didn't give a shit.

Watari had followed him from the room as L had turned back to his screens and politely asked that he take either Matt or Near with him, that none of them should be going out, or at least not going out alone.

And it was really only then that it struck him. L was allowing him to leave with absolutely no fuss, when before L had specifically stated that they were, under no circumstances other than impossible need, to leave the building.

Mello doubted that what the detective was feeling was guilt, but perhaps he understood Mello's simple need to just...get away?

But whatever the reason, Mello was hitting the streets. He didn't exactly have a destination in mind, but he knew he wanted to be distracted. And if that meant he had to drag Matt along for the ride then so be it.

Though he didn't think the redhead would protest too much.

"Matt, get anything you think you might need for going out. I have L's permission to leave for a while." he stated, rather than asked, when he found the gamer seated at his laptop.

"We're going out? Since when was it decided I was going, and I thought L said-"

"I _told_ him I was going. And Watari said it was best I take someone with me, and I sure as hell wasn't taking Near." Matt snorted in ill hidden amusement as he shoved away from the desk and stretched. Mello looked away, the odd feeling in his gut flaring up when he looked at the exposed skin of Matt's stomach.

Mello knew what it was, he was hardly blind to his emotions after years learning to dissect them even if he couldn't control them, but he wasn't about to feed into it. It wasn't...right. If it were anyone else he wouldn't have a problem with it, excluding Near as he would never feel anything for him. But it was Matt and it just...

"Mello?"

Mello shook his thoughts away and smirked at Matt. It didn't matter what those stupid emotions said, he was going to ignore them until they rotted and withered away. Or until he distracted himself where he didn't notice it...

"Bring money, I'm not sure where we are going yet. But I want to be far enough away to take a cab. At least then they won't be tempted to spy on us." and Mello really wouldn't put it passed L to do that. Sure, he might let them out, but he would monitor them the entire time. And to Mello that kind of defeated the purpose of going out in the first place.

Matt made no complaints so Mello figured he didn't mind going, not that Mello was really giving him a choice. "Are you sure it's alright for us to leave? I really don't want L coming in to find us, guns blazing or anything. That would be rather embarrassing, wouldn't it?"

Mello grimaced. He could just imagine them at some place, maybe an arcade that Matt would drag him to, and having Watari and a few other hired help rush in with guns drawn to escort them out of there.

"No, we're good. L won't do anything or he would have protested when I told him I was going out." Well, protested wasn't exactly what L would have done, he would have flat out denied Mello.

Mello hesitated for a moment before he quickly strode into the bathroom and brushed his hair, checking himself once over in the mirror.

"Mello you look fine, now let's go. I don't want to be out if it rains later like it's supposed to." Matt grumbled at him as he sat on the edge of the bed, just visible from the inside of the bathroom with the door ajar. Mello flushed slightly at Matt's words; he couldn't help it. He just wished that Matt wasn't simply saying it to get them to leave.

But some things just couldn't be helped.

"Fine. I'm ready. We should go out one of the other exits..." Mello knew L had more than one of them then they had been told of initially but Matt had long since hacked the schematics of the building and there was at least one other entrance and exit.

Mello figured it was supposed to be a secret but L had probably known that someone would find them. There wasn't anything Mello could bring with him, as his leather didn't have pockets, so he didn't bother going through a mental list of what they might need. So long as Matt had his wallet on him they would be fine.

Mello closed the door behind them and followed Matt, who always seemed to know where they were going in the impossibly large building, until they reached the stairs. Mello groaned internally. He didn't' want to walk down however many flights of stairs it took to get outside. But from the look Matt shot him that was exactly the plan.

Six flights of stairs and one sub-basement level later they had reached the outside after having to go through one of the security systems, though all they had to do was scan their fingers and it let them out. Mello figured it was Watari's doing.

Mello breathed in the scent of fresh air, as fresh as it got in their area at any rate.

"So... what now?" Matt asked him, and Mello grinned.

In the end, after a lengthy battle of where they each would not go it was somehow decided a club was their best bet. Well only after Mello had assured the redhead they wouldn't have a problem getting inside.

Mello knew how he looked, which was thankfully better than how he felt. He looked dangerous, despite Matt's snort when he'd said as much, and in the area they were going to the most they would do was card them, if that. They wouldn't need to have their names on any list.

It had started to lightly drizzle outside by the time they had arrived, a taxi two blocks away from their map quested club, and Mello didn't have to look over to know that Matt wasn't happy with him. Matt _disliked _rain.

Or rather, disliked being rained on.

Mello bypassed the line, some of the club goers dispersing as the rain poured harder, and walked up to the bouncer. The man gave Mello a long look and despite the fact that he could probably break him in half with his hands alone Mello didn't so much as blink. Roger used to give him the same look so he was more than used to it.

Mello almost thought they were going to be carded, in which the bouncer would be more attentive when it came to looking at it but after a moment the man nodded and Mello withheld his grin, knowing that the bouncer would probably change his mind. He motioned to Matt and the bouncer inclined his head, still watching them as they walked in.

He let his face explode in a huge smirk the second they were out of sight and Matt smiled at him, relaxing his posture back into his half slouch.

"I know you brought my ID, let me have it." Mello knew he would have to shove it in his boot to keep it on him, but it was better than needing Matt to pull it out every time someone carded him. Because he was in a club and there was no way he wasn't drinking at least once.

He and Matt may not be of legal drinking age but that didn't mean they didn't have ID's that said they were. Matt sighed heavily but dug out his wallet as they moved over by the wall. Matt handed it over along with a small wad of cash. Mello didn't even know where the latter had come from.

"I don't know why you didn't just do this earlier. You can be frustrating at times, you know that?" Matt complained, though he held a smile so Mello knew he wasn't _exactly _mad.

"Shall we?" Mello grinned at the redhead and sauntered off before said teen could answer. Mello shoved and wedged his way through the crowd, having to struggle through the dance floor to get to the bar. Mello had no intention of getting drunk but he was going to get something to warm him up and perhaps drown the discomfort that moved across his lower half.

By the time Mello had gotten away from the tightly packed body of people that swayed and moved as one mindless mass he had lost track of Matt who was now _somewhere_ in the crowd. He knew Matt could take care of himself so Mello wasn't worried. That and he knew Matt would meet him there soon, well as soon as he got himself free. The thought that something bad might have happened to his friend hadn't even crossed Mello's mind.

He strode up to the bar, a space where it wasn't surprisingly crowded and smirked at the bartender. "ID?" they asked before he could even utter a word. The woman looked slightly surprised as he pulled it free from his boot. She had obviously expected him to frown and turn away.

She scrutinized it for a while, obviously trying to find a flaw that Mello knew Matt wouldn't have left before shrugging a shoulder and handing it back to him. Inside, Mello grinned.

"What will you have?"

"Something with chocolate in it." he answered without thinking. He hadn't had a bar of chocolate in some odd hours and was craving it. Some syrupy concoction would just have to do. The bartender hummed in response before moving away to dip a glass in what looked like sugar before pouring equal parts of a clear liquid and an almost caramel colored liquid into the glass and setting it before him.

It looked like the type of drink that required a fancy umbrella in it despite it clearly being in a shot glass. Mello was infinity glad it didn't have one. "Suck on this first, then take a sip." the bartender offered a lemon wedge to him next and despite how odd it was Mello took it.

He made a face at the taste of a sugary lemon and didn't even ask what was in the shot and simply took a sip to get rid of the other taste. To Mello's surprise it tasted exactly like chocolate.

"It's called a Chocolate Cake shot. It's made from a Hazelnut liqueur and Vanil vodka with a sugared rim and a dash of lemon." she smiled ruefully at him knowing the lemon hardly tasted well on its own even with the sugar.

Mello made a note of the ingredients and filed it away for later; he would definitely want more of them away from the bar. With a small nod to her he knocked back the rest of the shot. The slow burn of the alcohol as it made its way to his stomach was oddly refreshing. He slammed the shot on the bar and grinned widely at the bartender who rose an eyebrow at him, her full lips curling into a light smile as she poured him another.

Five of those later he was grinning like an idiot at an exasperated looking Matt. "How the hell did you get yourself in this state in hardly a half hour?" Matt's tone matched his appearance but Mello knew that all Matt needed to do was loosen up a little.

"Come on Matty, have a drink! Maybe you will get rid of that sour look." he grinned wider at the frown Matt sent his way and stuffed a hand into Matt's pocket much to the redhead's surprise and grabbed his wallet. He handed Matt's ID to the very amused bartender who looked his over less carefully before handing it back with a nod.

"Get him something with vodka in it..." Mello trailed off, not knowing enough about drinks or combinations to know if anything Matt liked would be mixed into them. Otherwise he would have been specific. But Mello did know that vodka was strong and would get Matt in a less irritated mood rather quick.

"Red Headed Slut." the bartender announced as she set the shot beside Matt and Mello couldn't help but laugh at Matt's expression. Matt palmed his face and shook his head before grabbing the shot and swallowing it whole.

"Hmm. Tasted good." Matt mumbled, clearly not having expected to like it. Mello had no idea how long they stayed there, drinking and laughing. Trying random drinks with perverted names like Cocksucking Cowboy and Cum Shot.

Somehow they had thought it was a good idea to move to the dance floor after paying with practically all the money they had come with. The beat was hard and fast, some dirty techno song with no where decent lyrics that left people gyrating against one another. Mello hardly had any complaints and threw his hands above his head and swayed his hips. He felt like he was flying, his body heated up and chilled at the same time.

Mello didn't even flinch when someone's hand suddenly trailed along the length of his thigh, his eyes closed tightly and head titled to the side as he danced. He felt the beat in his chest and the hands creeping to his waste and a groin grinding against him.

Mello only peered through barely parted lashes when lips hesitantly touched his cheek; and seeing the splash of red hair he threw his arms around the body before him and forced the kiss into something hot and slippery.

Mello gasped against Matt's mouth, sharing both breath and saliva with him. He suddenly couldn't get enough and with his heart beating along to the music he slid his hands into that sweaty hair and pressed himself closer.

Matt responded wonderfully and ground against him with hands moving along Mello's lower back and along the mound of his ass. Mello couldn't help the jerking reaction he had and moaned as their groins rubbed together, the friction delicious.

There were some annoyed grunts from those around them simply out there for the dancing or the hands of others that strayed to his body that he only wanted Matt to touch.

"Leave... we need to leave." one of them shouted over the music and Mello wasn't sure which of them had said it. Couldn't say if it had been his own response to his thoughts or if Matt had thought the same thing.

All Mello could concentrate on were the lips on his lips and the hand sliding across his bare chest and the arm around his waist. He wasn't sure where his vest had gone or when it had been discarded or why he was being kissed in the first place, only that he was and that he was enjoying it.

Mello didn't remember leaving the pit of dancers or the club or even getting back to L's building from the club or how they got back into their room; all he could register was the cool feeling of the bathroom tiles as Matt pressed him into them, licking at his neck and fondling his erection through the leather.

"Matt..." he murmured, tugging the redhead's hot mouth closer to him and bucking into that hand. There was something Mello was supposed to be remembering, something important, something that he could almost grasp but he no longer listened to the warning bells in the back of his mind as that warm hand stroked him and he simply...let go.

His leather was kicked to the side and any gathering thoughts scattered the minute Matt's slicked fingers gently prodded his entrance and slipped past the clenched ring of muscle.

Mello's legs trembled and nearly gave way with Matt being the only thing holding him up. Mello couldn't tell if it was because of the slight burning sensation at his backside or the sudden swimming of his vision but he didn't protest when Matt maneuvered them into the shower and laid him down.

He gasped softly as the fingers were replaced and Matt's mouth met his once more but the rest of the night was a blur.

-End Part 7-

**AN: **Yes... yes i did just end it there.

Yes I have had a Chocolate shot before, and yes it is damn good. XD

Anyway, there are variations of the Redheaded Slut drink and I chose the one with Cranberry flavored Vodka rather than the Cranberry juice. As well as Jagermeister, Southern Comfort and Crown Royal in substitution to the Peach Schnapps.

**Special thanks to reviewers**: TheParanoidNerd, Mercory, Franzy's Whiplash Splash, Aeleita, XxCatalinaxX, MsMattJeevas, CharizardCyndi, Kari Twilight Mist, amos222, Possessed4evr, Black Cheshire, pandagirl77

Review?


	9. Part 8

**Disclaimer:** I don't own DN

**Suggested Listening**: Tell Me I'm a Wreck **by** Every Avenue _(a really good band XD)_; Zombie **by **The Pretty Reckless _(in an odd way kinda reminds me of Mello)_

Part 8

~Zombie~

Matt's head was foggy as he woke. His body ached all over and half of him was freezing. With a small groan, the sound sending a painful shock through his skull, he pried open his eyelids to focus blurrily on his surroundings.

He was immediately greeted by the sight of messy blond hair and a naked body beneath him. Matt's breath hitched and he tried desperately to remember just how he and Mello had gotten into that position.

He remembered Mello getting them into a nearby club though they were underage and loosing Mello in the crowd to find him drinking his problems away... and by his own stupidity and Mello's drunken nagging he had drank too.

Matt remembered how they had danced, hips jerking into each other and loose hands wandering to places they never would have touched sober. He remembered... he remembered having sex with his best friend in their bathroom tub.

He swallowed heavily and froze as Mello twitched beneath him. Mello couldn't wake up with them still naked and entangled and covered in fluids. Probably more than just semen...but Matt pushed the last thought away as he struggled to stand without waking the sleeping blond.

Matt couldn't help but stare at Mello's naked body, chest rising and falling softly in sleep, and his slim hips... Matt had to force his gaze away before he looked any lower. Although his memories from the night before were foggy in certain places they were more than enough to fill in what he had refused to look at.

Matt rubbed at his temple with a restrained sigh. Goddamn it. He had liked having sex with Mello..._really_ liked it; and he shouldn't have. He shuddered, legs twitching, as he felt phantom touches on his skin. Those nails raking down his back as he pushed inside-

Matt shut his eyes and breathed deeply. He needed to get his mind to something else, anything else..

Cleaning... he needed to clean himself up and then... then wake Mello up with the shower. It would get ride of some of the evidence... but Mello couldn't possibly miss the pain in his lower half. Could he?

Unless he was so hangover and simply ignore it or thought he had gotten with someone at the club...

Fuck.

What if Mello remembered exactly as much as he had? What then? No amount of cleaning or denying would work... what would they do then?

Pretend it never happened?

But Matt wasn't sure he wanted to forget. A strange feeling welled up inside him at the thought of not trying for something more, anything more, with his friend. But he was confused. Mello was just his friend and hell they were both straight, and Mello had never showed any interest in him before the alcohol.

Matt pressed his palm against his forehead and tried to rid himself of the headache that was forming. He could untangle his thoughts later despite the other nagging one that told him thoughts of anything more were dangerous; for the moment however, he needed to get out of there.

The second he was standing on the fuzzy bathroom matt, upon stiff legs, he nabbed a washcloth and used it to hastily wash the remnants of sex off of himself. It was no substitute for a shower but Matt could at least comfortably put the clothing from last night back on himself.

As for Mello... he was getting the shower turned on him. Matt needed him awake despite not wanting to face what he had started the night before. Because it was hardly Mello who had kissed first.

And Matt would be damned if he ever drank another thing after that...

He was slightly warmer with his dirty clothes back on and although Matt felt bad for doing it he turned the shower knob and winced at the startled yell Mello let out, both of them groaning in pain it caused their sensitive heads.

"What the hell... Matt turn it off!" Mello hissed his voice hardly above a whisper. Matt complied and watched as Mello shivered and an odd pink water ran down the drain. He tore his eyes from the sight and tried no to remind himself that it was still all over himself too in places he simply couldn't get without the use of a shower.

"Matt... how did we...and why am I...?" Mello blinked up at him, eyes squinted as he appeared confused.

"How much of last night do you remember?" Matt asked the blond carefully. Mello gave him a blank look for a moment before replying _'nothing after we started drinking_.'

It was both a blessing and a curse, something that Matt would think about later when he could think rationally. Something he would only think about after a shower, though he couldn't help the smidgen of hurt that bubbled in his chest.

"Why the hell am I lying down in the tub naked?" Mello grumbled as he slowly moved himself into a seated position. Mello got an odd look in his eyes as he shifted in discomfort and Matt's hope that he wouldn't notice fell away.

"I have no idea. I woke up on the floor next to the bed." Matt shrugged. "When I didn't see you around the room I went to look for you and found you in here. I need a shower so you had to wake up." He grinned at the end, without any real amusement, and Mello growled at him.

"So you turn the shower on me?" Mello snapped, though to Matt it seemed more of a reflex than anything; Mello seemed down, unhappy, though the only thing Matt could attribute it to would be his headache.

"You should shower first." Matt commented blandly and watched as Mello blinked and looked down, his features instantly contorting into a grimace.

"Yeah...guess I should." Mello mumbled quietly and began to stand. His movements were slow and strained and Matt guessed that Mello's legs were numb from lying on the cold tube the entire night.

The second Mello began to sway, his left leg giving out, Matt didn't even think as he wrapped his arms around Mello's waist and pulled him close to hold him up. Mello's breath had quickened for that split second, the realization he was about to fall sliding over his face, but calmed as Matt caught him.

Matt could hardly breathe with Mello so close and distantly he couldn't help but wonder at that. If the situation had happened even a week ago he would have simply been able to laugh at the blond as he helped him and then it would be over. But now... he couldn't help but concentrate on the soft but slightly frozen skin under his fingertips. Or Mello's heartbeat that beat against him from the blond's naked chest.

"Thanks Matt..." he caught Mello saying as he stood straighter and supported his own weight. Matt beat down the part of him that wanted to continue to hold the blond and slowly let go of him, making sure he wasn't about to fall.

"I'm fine now. It was just a leg cramp."

Matt nodded, knowing there was really nothing he could say, and quickly backed out of the bathroom. He gently closed the door and didn't dare to breathe again until the water had turned on.

Matt numbly shuffled over to his bed and sat down heavily. He reached over and took his cigarettes and lighter off the bedside table. He really didn't care if he was or wasn't supposed to smoke in the room, he _needed _a cigarette.

Once lit he inhaled deeply and held his breath until lightheaded. How the hell had things gotten so complicated?

Matt let his chin fall to his chest, careful not to burn himself with the cigarette despite paying it only minimal attention. Sure, anyone would expect to be slightly shaken at finding out they'd slept with their male best friend when drunk. But Matt had realized that there might be actual feelings attached to it... that conflicted with so many things from his past.

He swallowed heavily and shut his eyes so he wouldn't continuously watch the bathroom door where Mello was showering inside; his naked lean body covered with water and...

Matt hunched over and gripped his hair harshly. He had more than liked what had occurred; it had felt so good to be with Mello, not just the physical. Matt hunched over a little more. He might.. he might want to _be _with him.

And it scared him.

But Mello didn't seem to remember anything yet and maybe it was a good thing. Matt liked their friendship, was comfortable with it, and if Mello remembering meant that changing... then he wished Mello never remembered.

Matt vaguely noted that the shower had turned off but was only pulled from his thoughts as Mello's head peaked out of the bathroom.

"Matt...?"

His head shot up to look at Mello, though he immediately regretted it as the chainsaws in his brain came to life. "Yeah?" he asked, wincing in pain.

"Can you get me some clothes? I don't have anything in here other than my leather and it's... well its dirty to say the least." Mello said quietly, though the last part a sigh was added.

"Yeah, just give me a minute." Matt stood and was grateful Mello hadn't said anything about his cigarette. He rummaged through one of Mello's draws, amused to see similar clothing to his own in it, and picked out articles at random. He handed them to Mello, who shut the door immediately afterwards and gently hit his head on the door.

Why, in Zelda's name, did he have to have done something so stupid while drunk?

-End Zombie-

**AN**: shorter chapter but eh... XD

Also I **updated **_Bingo Daubers & I Love You's_ on Sunday but FFN was acting funny so I doubt anyone noticed XD

**Special thanks**: Possessed4evr, Mercory, Amour en Rayures, schoolkid, MsMattJeevas, Chaotica Keehl, monochrome1994, pandagirl77, XxCatalinaxX, Kari Twilight Mist

Review?


	10. Part 9

**Disclaimer**: _See Previous_

**Suggested Listening**: Walking Away **by **Smile Empty Soul; Sadly Smiling Through **by** One Less Reason

Part 9

~Haunt~

Contrary to Matt's belief, Mello did remember parts of that night.

The hands on him as he danced. The lips on his neck and... flashes of green eyes as he was fucked so gently in the bathtub. Mello hoped to God he was misremembering, because if he and Matt really had...and Matt was ignoring it... Mello curled his hands into the jeans he wore and took a deep breath.

The more he thought about it, the more he _knew_ it could have only been Matt. No one else could have gotten into the building with L's security system in place never mind get back out, especially some random person he 'might' have hooked up with at the club.

And Mello was certain he hadn't been in the clubs bathroom as he remembered being laid down; and while it could have been the floor he distinctly remembered it being smooth. The clubs floor was tiled and would not have felt seamless.

There was also no way he could have been taken to another place, such as someone's apartment or hotel room, and found his way back to L's with as trashed as he had been.

So either by some extremely rare and unlikely coincidences it had been someone from the club... or it had been Matt. Who had to have been lying when he'd said he had woken up sleeping next to the bed, with_ all _of his clothes on. Matt didn't _want _to remember.

All of that had led to awkwardness between them the last few days. Mello fisted his hair and hunched over his knees. He knew he couldn't expect Matt to suddenly _like_ him, but lately it didn't even seem like he wanted their friendship either.

And though he wouldn't admit it if asked, it hurt.

"Is Mello still having cramps? I believe he is being unrealistic in his portrayal of ailments if so; everyone knows you are not on your 'period' any longer." Near's bland and yet sarcastic voice startled him.

Near had definitely changed for the worse. Mello had always wanted him to show emotion but sarcasm and the like had not been in mind. The note, how Mello hated that damn thing, had changed Near's personality. And Mello had begun to think it was becoming similar to that of Kira's towards the end, at least from what L had said of the man.

"I'm not portraying anything Near. Go fuck one of your toys or something and leave me the hell alone." he snapped. He was more than glad the period had ended, after a full seven days of hell, but the problems it left in the aftermath seemed worse than when he'd had it.

He wouldn't have gotten drunk and slept with Matt had it not been for it. He should never have touched that damnable notebook. He should have been smart like Matt had been. But his stupid need to be better than Near in everything had clouded his judgment yet again and he had rushed ahead and blindly grabbed the book, never expecting to be part of one of L's experiments.

"Perhaps Mello is the one in need of fucking something with how tense he seems." Near taunted, an odd look in his dark eyes. He was still so emotionless despite everything and his words struck Mello and he simply couldn't help himself.

Mello stood and without a second thought his fist connected with Near's cheek. He watched in satisfaction as the albino fell to the floor and gently touched his lip with a small wince. It wasn't enough for Mello but he knew he would be in enough trouble so rather than kicking Near like he'd wanted, he walked off.

His control on his emotions and impulses was worse than before and Mello wasn't certain if it were a lingering effect of the period or something else contact with the notebook had caused. Mello had made sure not to touch it again but look what just once had done? Mello had mostly memorized the contents, and honestly couldn't care if he was missing something. He wasn't going to touch it again.

It was bad enough that L had noticed that and told Mello to keep it in his room permanently as he and Matt were least likely to be tempted to use it; it had been in their room too much beforehand when he'd been constantly bringing it in there to look over, but to not want it anymore and to have it...

Mello didn't want to use it, he wanted to destroy it. Whatever pull he'd felt before had left him the second it had sunk in just how fucked his situation had become.

Though for Near, Mello might have made an exception to not using it.

He passed Watari in the hallway who gave him a disapproving look, as though he had seen what had occurred. Honestly, Mello didn't care. He could have done a lot worse to that brat so he should get a reward. Near out of anyone, for his recent behavior, should be the one getting that look.

But he wasn't.

He never did.

Because he was the little clone L.

Mello was back into their room before he had even thought about it and had slammed the door, startling Matt in the process. Mello stood there awkwardly for a few moments before stiffly moving to sit on his bed. Mello noted how the room had gone completely quiet since he'd entered, Matt not even bothering to type.

He grit his teeth and sat there stubbornly and tried to ignore just how messed up everything was.

"Mello..." Matt began but paused and stopped before he said anything else; it was also the first time Matt had said anything in days. Mello hated how a simple conversation, well perhaps not simple, was so awkward.

He glanced Matt's way but when nothing more was said easily removed his gaze. Everything was too weird...

Mello heard Matt sigh, almost sadly, and watched through the corner of his eye as the redhead stood up and walked from of the room, closing the door gently behind him as he went. Mello stared at the door for a long while afterwards. Matt was never one to be bothered or stay bothered by things for long and Mello had been almost certain that the redhead would have said something, anything, to get rid of the silence.

Maybe he had put Matt into too much of an awkward situation…

He swallowed the sharp feeling of sadness that threatened to overwhelm him and instead moved to get his laptop; he needed something to occupy his mind and thoughts, something that was neither Near nor Matt. He froze at what Matt's abandoned laptop screen showed. It was the Kira case files. Mello couldn't help but be drawn to them, more than curious, and sat down.

Mello had hardly thought about the case in the past few days. Too many things going on for him to spare an extra thought for the things outside of the immediate. But Matt had. Probably...probably for him. Matt never really showed much interest in those things himself, so Mello doubted it was for fun, not when he could have been gaming or at the very least smoking.

His grip tightened on the mouse unconsciously and he felt even worse for the weirdness between them caused by his stupid idea to go out for the night...

But it couldn't be remedied with Matt having gone God knows where and Mello didn't want to go after him; at least not until Matt had had time to himself in case he were angry... though it was probably more like disappointed. And Mello wouldn't blame him for that.

Mello pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind and instead concentrated on what Matt had left up. While there was stuff on the rest of the case Matt's main focus on that document had been L's previous team and how he had found it extremely odd that they had just up and disappeared.

There was a stream of Matt's thoughts, put in parenthesis, that noted that the only reason he'd looked into the matter further was that something had nagged at his thoughts until he'd had no choice but to look into it again rather then simply let it stay as a passing mystery to the larger Kira case.

Matt had been bothered by how much some of the detectives had left behind; it didn't make sense for some of them to leave, and Mello agreed completely with the statement.

Soichiro Yagami, the Kira 'suspects' father, also had left behind a wife and daughter; the latter who had been placed a mental hospital due to an unrelated issue. Perhaps family life had simply been too much, or he had found out his son was Kira, and had up and left, but the other man Shuichi Aizawa didn't have the same potential stress issues.

He had a wife and young daughter, a boringly happy life from the looks of it. There was no logical reason for him to have left. None at all.

Matt had left additional notes on the side on the likelihood that either the men had been forced, for some reason, to go into hiding, were killed or had been affected by the Death Note. Matt had began a list of possible scenarios connected with the notebook theory but had seemingly stopped in the middle; it had to have been when he had walked in the room.

A lot of it was things Mello had thought of as well and partly what Matt had previously touched upon in another document, but there was the new information about their families which made their disappearance ever more suspicious.

Their background information had been hidden as well, according to Matt, and probably by L. but the 'why' was the real question. For what reason had it all been kept from them? There wasn't any great gain by erasing their information.

Unless, it wasn't only the investigation team that had gone missing but their families as well. Just what the hell had Matt found?

And why the hell hadn't Mello thought to look into it more thoroughly before? ...that might have been around the time his _problems_ had started and when he had stupidly let the notebook take a hold on him.

It shouldn't be difficult to get info on the missing detective's families and if it were then there was a strong likelihood that something had happened to them. Something that required it to be covered up.

He had to go find Matt. Even if he was hurt about Matt's lie it wasn't _entirely_ his fault. He didn't know Matt's reasons for it; though the more Mello thought on it the easier it was for him to see why Matt might want to hide it. Sleeping with your best friend and _telling_ him what had happened when he supposedly didn't remember couldn't be easy but neither was it easy to _know_ the other was lying.

Mello shoved himself away from the computer before he could convince himself not to go. He needed to, whether he _wanted _to or not. There was a creeping feeling inside him, that if he didn't talk to Matt soon things would become unfixable between them. And Mello knew he wouldn't be able to live with himself if that happened.

No matter what had happened, Matt was still his friend and always would be.

He wasn't sure where Matt would be and hoped that he found him before they were summoned by Watari or L to eat or he wouldn't have time to actually talk to him; assuming he knew what to say when he got there. Mello doubted Matt would be anywhere around the medical wing, though he could be wrong, so instead Mello decided to head to the more 'residential' portions that were fairly close by.

They mainly consisted of rooms built for the previous team, where they stayed and the kitchens along with one or two special rooms. One was a library, though how anyone would have had the time to use it during the case was anyone's guess. And the other was where Mello eventually found Matt in what could be called a common room, with a large flat screen TV in the middle and a black leather couch in front of it where Matt sat with his back to the door.

Mello approached the redhead quietly and watched him game for a few minutes. The brunette haired character on screen kept dying, their shouts as they were mauled by zombies echoing through the room. Matt never died. Ever.

"Matt." he called softly and watched as Matt's fingers froze over the controls and the Game Over sign stayed floating on screen, asking in giant flashy letting if he wanted to continue. Mello sucked in a large breath and released it before placing himself between Matt and his sight of the TV.

"Matt I'm... I'm..." he sighed in defeat. "Look, I don't know who started it but I hate the silence that's settled between us." he mumbled the last part hesitantly. It sounded strange to him, the words that he spoke, but it was what he felt.

"You're an idiot."

Mello gaped. "I'm trying to apologize and you say some crap like that? What the hell Matt!" he snarled but paused as Matt's lips twitched. He understood then, that Matt had already forgiven him.

"Yeah... I guess I am an idiot." he mumbled softly.

"Glad you figured that out. Want to play?" Matt grinned tiredly at him and Mello just couldn't say no, despite wanting to discuss the case. Kira could wait, Mello decided, as he sat down next to Matt.

Because Matt would always be more important.

-End 9-

**AN**: yay an update… great because the next two weeks are going to be hard and I might not get an update in. yesterday my right hand started to swell up and got worse over the course of my work night to the point where my fingers were double to that of my left, not even my brace was helping *my left is just starting that now* I'm taking meds to get rid of the inflammation in my joints but well see how that goes, typing kinda hurts right now so…..

And next week I have to work a full week as the other cashier goes on vacation, I wont be writing at all and I doubt ill get to editing either, sorry :P

**Special thanks**: Salvi, Kari Twilight Mist, maili-chan, Amour en Rayures, Mercory, Possessed4evr, Chaotica Keehl, MsMattJeevas, pandagirl77, XxCatalinaxX

Review?


	11. Part 10

**AN: **Ok, I'm so sorry for not updating in TWO weeks when my intention had only been one.. but I've got a good excuse. I had almost made it through the week from hell, getting ready to face the last night of the week and more than ready for the next night when I could sit down and write/edit, but I woke up before work and i felt sick, now had it stayed like that it might not have been so bad. However working that night when what I really needed to be doing was resting KILLED my system. I went to sleep after work and woke up feeling absolutely wretched. Head pounding, heart going about 80 in my chest, sinuses undecided if they should be clogged or not and feeling like I got run over by the horse, its cart and a thousand other things. Needless to say I've not been doing much of anything other than reading until I'm passed out on the keyboard of the upstairs computer *literally... I had marks on my cheek from when I feel asleep on the keyboard* but now its settled into my chest and leaving my head alone for the most part so I'm at least able to think. All is well *notreallybutyeah* that's my excuse, forgive?

**Suggested Listening**: In this Together **by** Apoptygma Berzerk

Part 10

~Floating~

"Matt come here, I might have found something." Mello called out but hadn't looked away from the screen.

Matt dutifully walked over and peered over the blonds shoulder to see what all the fuss was about. He and Mello had gotten over their awkward patch just a day or so before, and though things were still quieter between them then they had been, it was almost back to normal.

For a while Matt had thought that maybe Mello had remembered having sex with him, but then the blond had apologized, so Matt had no idea what had been the problem, only that he hoped it didn't become an issue again as he had hated having Mello act so weird around him.

His eyes drifted from the screen and downwards to see that Mello's arm was wrapped unconsciously around his stomach again. He had started that a few days ago and Matt hoped that everything was alright. It was still a few days too early to even think about Mello having his... period, so it worried him that Mello's stomach was tender, as the blond had put it.

It could just be a warning sign of the impending period, that much Matt knew was possible, but they really didn't know just how much the Death Note had messed with his system, what else it might have done to him.

Mello was never one to procrastinate, and certainly never with his health, but Matt understood why he hadn't listened to the doctor and had a specialist brought in. Mello already felt like a sideshow freak and had already been embarrassed enough and didn't want to go through anything else unless there was an absolute _need_.

But despite understanding this, Matt was still worried. Nothing going on was normal, so any symptoms that were strange should be checked into but telling that to Mello would probably not go over well.

So instead he dragged his eyes away from Mello and back to the screen where Mello had pointed to his findings. It was hardly anything big, and very well could have been a coincidence, but it was at least possibly a nudge in the right direction.

It was a set of five plane tickets to the states from Japan bought the night before L's previous team was officially listed as missing, or gone. It was hardly strange for there to be group tickets purchased, but for their area and that date and time, it made it a little more noticeable. Especially as there were no other group purchases in that day.

The problem with that would have been that L should have already looked into that if it were so obvious. "Mello-"

"I know Matt. But does it seem like L has really put forth much effort into finding them to you? I mean in all of this data it simply seems like he crossed them off the list the second they disappeared and left it at that. We don't know that L has even looked this far into it."

Matt was a little more than surprised to hear Mello say that, despite how conflicted Mello had sounded as he'd said it. Mello admitting that L might not have done everything he could, or should have, was more than a little odd. It wasn't a bad thing, as it meant Mello was at least willing to see L's flaws, but still weird.

"There is nothing more on their families either, is there?" Mello asked, and Matt shook his head. They had searched and searched but were blocked at seemingly every turn. All they could seem to find was basic information on the detectives families, where they had lived, but that was it.

No current information.

Nothing to tell if they were still in the area, or even still alive.

Noting at all.

And it didn't add up to either of them.

"Damn it!" Mello swore and Matt knew enough to back up. The blond raced to the bathroom as he cursed again. Mello had also, within the past few days, had to urinate more frequently than usual; it would have been comical had it not been another thing, besides the abdominal soreness, that worried Matt.

He knew the signs for diabetes and while Mello was constantly tested since he ate so much chocolate, it didn't mean he couldn't still develop it in-between tests.

Matt scrubbed a hand across his face and sighed. He knew he was worrying too much and that it was probably nothing, but Mello... Mello was really the only one in his life he had left to care for.

"What's that look for? I'm perfectly fine. I probably just drank too much water." Mello scoffed at him, though it might have been a bit more convincing had Mello looked like he'd believed himself.

"Just like when the Death Note messed up your insides you thought it was nothing too." Matt wished he had kept his mouth shut as Mello's expression darkened. They had only just started getting comfortable again and he had to go and say something like that, was he stupid-

"Your right." Mello sighed and flopped gracelessly onto his bed rather than sitting back at the laptop.

"I'm right…?" had Mello really just..?

"Look, it's probably just the premenstrual stuff, but if it lasts after the period I'll get it checked out, alright? I'll even let you be the one to ask Watari for the appointment." Mello mumbled into his pillow, lips only partially visible and voice muffled.

Matt smiled slightly. "I'll hold you to that." And he would. If Mello was still feeling awkward after his latest _problem_ then it didn't matter what Mello wanted, he was getting checked out. What if the Death Note hadn't stopped at the uterus and messed with other things? Even if the symptoms were small, they were mounting up, and Matt wasn't going to wait until Mello was bleeding in bed again or worse before something was done about it.

"Alright, so what are we going to do about the plane tickets? Am I hacking into the airports security where the flight landed to see if anything was captured on the cameras or…?" Matt trailed off as Mello rolled over, shirt riding up to reveal his smooth flat stomach. Mello's left arm was behind his head, pillowing it, and the other came to rest by his mouth as he thought. Matt had to tear his gaze from the blond and rest it upon the wall beside him.

Mello made him so damn confused sometimes, and despite his hormones apparently liking Mello's body, Matt wasn't sure if what he suddenly felt was lust stemming from their friendship…or something else entirely.

Matt wasn't exactly able to have much free time to speculate on it as he and Mello pretty much kept to themselves and Mello was almost always with him. During meals, during research, during sleep…

"Matt?" he snapped his gaze back to Mello, who had shifted to his side, and grinned weakly at him.

"I was just spacing out while waiting for an answer…" Matt knew he had dropped the ball, so to speak, as Mello's eyes narrowed. Matt guessed it was because he had actually answered rater than shrugged it off. Mello got him unsettled better than anyone, he was just usually better at hiding and ignoring it. At that moment, Matt wished he had a game in his hand. Instead he sat down awkwardly on Mello's chair as Mello watched him with suspicion.

Mello's lips had moved into a thin line but he hadn't said anything.

"Why don't we start with what you suggested, but if nothing pans out then we can go back to looking for things around here." Mello said slowly, eyes still watching him carefully, though he had appeared to have given up for the moment.

"OK..." Matt moved back over to his own computer, rather pointless to have sat down in Mello chair, and brought it over to Mello's bed instead. What was the point when Mello would probably need to see what he was doing anyway?

Mello didn't move from his spot so Matt seated himself towards the edge of the bed with his back to the blond so Mello could easily see the screen from where he was. With a roll of his shoulders, and a quick cracking of his fingers, he began.

It wouldn't be difficult, not after some major hacks he'd done for the Kira case alone, but he didn't want to make a mistake. It would not only be embarrassing but probably get them into trouble. And he didn't want to let Mello down in the process.

It took only a minute and a half to get into the airports systems and hack into the flight records; he wanted to make sure they had the correct gate that flight had disembarked from as airlines were nefarious for rerouting and changing things at the last minute.

With everything checking out he moved onto the security footage for that gate and just in case they were disguised he ran his facial recognition program. But here was nothing. They weren't there.

"Nothing." he heard Mello sigh behind him and groan in frustration. "Would they have smuggled themselves out through luggage?" the blond suggested half-heartedly, but Matt didn't think it was such a bad suggestion.

Instead of replying he changed which cameras they viewed and though they couldn't see everything, they had a good view of the plane and runway. They viewed it on fast-forward, though slow enough where they would have been able to see something, but nothing obvious happened, mainly just the unloading and loading of cargo.

But what could they have hoped for, an obvious display of five Japanese men sneaking out of the bowels of the plane? That was such a ridiculous thought that Matt couldn't help but snicker at it despite the odd look Mello through him.

"Looks like we are back to square one." Mello mumbled, though Matt disagreed with him, square one would have left them in the complete dark about all of the Kira cases information. They had hit a road block but didn't all detectives eventually? L had called on his successors after all... though Matt was beginning to wonder if there hadn't been some other reason for it.

He lifted himself from the bed, laptop and all, and out of the corner of his eyes he noted how Mello rubbed at his stomach. It didn't matter what the blond said, there was something else going on.

Matt just hoped that there was something that could be done to help before things got too serious again. Because honestly, Matt wasn't sure how many more surprises they could all take.

-End part 10-

**AN**: w00t over 100 reviews for this! Thank you everyone who has reviewed, it really brightens my day to see reviews in my inbox. Anyway, there SHOULD be another update this week *probably thursday* since i've been kind of dead lately. :P

**Special thanks**: Kari Twilight Mist, pandagirl77, XxCatalinaxX, maili-chan, MsMattJeevas, Amour en Rayures, Possessed4evr, Zozabelle

review?


	12. Part 11

**Disclaimer: **See previous

**Suggested Listening:** Panic Switch **by **Silversun Pickups

Part 11

~Truth~

Mello had to admit that there _might _be something more going on. He had felt off the past few days, more so that when the abdominal soreness had begun. It wasn't anything major, just some fatigue, but there was no reason for the fatigue. He wasn't, and hadn't been, doing anything strenuous to have caused it; he was even getting more than his usual amount of sleep.

He might have let it slide a few more days or even weeks but he had promised Matt, and the redhead had been gracious enough so far not to jump the gun and call on Watari when the first symptoms had started. But Mello knew when to give in.

"Hey Matt... can you ask Watari to call the physician?" he winced as Matt's eyes immediately focused on him, he could tell even with that awful plastic covering his eyes being in the way. Matt didn't say anything and instead simply left the room; but somehow that was worse.

Mello thought waiting for Matt to return was the worst part, even worse then pretending nothing was wrong when he came back, pretended that they weren't waiting for Watari to call them down once the doctor had arrived.

As it turned out the wait wasn't long.

The same man was brought back as he already knew the odd circumstances that surrounded Mello so there was no need to waste time explaining it. When everything began the 'normal' questions were asked, such as 'when did the soreness start' and 'have you been doing anything strenuous to cause the fatigue'. Mello had no problem answering them but didn't see how it helped as the physician still drew his blood and took his temperature and blood pressure.

"Your temperature is running a little high." the man commented and wrote it down, as though he would forget it within the next five minutes. Mello couldn't understand it though, he didn't feel sick, at least not the kind of sick that accompanied a fever or high temperature.

He was given a gesture to seat himself, as they had to wait for the blood test results, so Mello took a seat next to Matt who was the only other soul in the room other than Watari despite L and Near knowing.

Matt gave him a nudge and held out his PSP. Mello didn't really want to play, not having the strong pull towards gaming like Matt had, but short of counting the invisible cracks in the ceiling or bashing his head against the wall he had nothing else to pass the time.

He gave Matt a small shrug and couldn't help the way his lips quirked in genuine amusement as Matt grinned at him and began explaining the little necessities of the contraption. By the time the doctor came back in Mello had died far too many times to count.

Mello felt his heart drop to his stomach at the oddly nervous and disbelieving look the doctor had. That could not bode well at all.

"I'm going to run a ah, _specific_ test to make sure the results are accurate... however I think they will come back the same. I just need to ask you something I should have earlier. Are you sexually active? Or rather, have you been since you started your period?"

Mello felt his face flush and didn't know how to answer. Matt was right beside him but if it were important to his health...

"I was allowed to go out a few weeks ago and I got drunk, and woke up a little sore, so it's possible..." he trailed off and hoped to God he didn't look suspicious to Matt.

The doctor looked even more uncomfortable with his newly acquired smile and Mello couldn't help the way dread flooded his system. What was wrong with him?

"Well I suppose congratulations are in order. Because according to this, you're pregnant."

Mello couldn't help himself, he laughed. Because that was complete bullshit, right? "Really, what's wrong?"

The man still had that same nervous look, only now it held something akin to sympathy. "For now all I can give you is one of the home pregnancy tests if you want proof while I run the other test again. But I can guarantee you, it's no joke."

Mello swallowed harshly. Pregnant? He was pregnant? How the fuck was that possible? No it wasn't, he was a guy. Men could _not _have babies.

But the traitor voice inside his head supplied that men couldn't have uterus's or have periods either. Mello however, refused to believe it.

"Take this and go into the bathroom, the directions are self explanatory." a pink box was shoved into his hands and he was led to the bathroom, though he hardly paid any attention to any of it until the door was shut and he was left by himself.

Mello stared down at the package in his hands and despite himself, opened it. His hands shook slightly as he pulled the test from its confines. It was ridiculous right? All it would prove was that the doctor had messed up... but if that were true, then why the hell was he so damn _scared_?

The directions were simple, pee on the test strip which was almost completely encased in the plastic, then set it aside for three minutes and view. One line for negative, two for positive.Simple, and utterly nerve wracking.

Mello did as directed and set the small innocent looking tube on the sink and leaned against the counter, arms crossed and eyes open defiantly. Another thought struck him as he waited, wasn't it too early to tell if he was _theoretically_ pregnant? Didn't you have to be further along?

He had never paid much attention to that part of their health studies, it wasn't necessary. He had never had any interest in girls, nor had he any interest in getting anyone pregnant, so what the hell did he need that information for? But now Mello wished he had paid more attention...not that it would have helped him.

The doctor seemed to know what he was talking about with the exception of assuming his test results hadn't been corrupted. Mello shifted anxiously. He had been counting off the minutes, rather obscurely, in the back of his mind and was certain that it had been at least three.

Mello grabbed the test from the counter expecting, hoping, to see one pink line only to freeze in spot. It was wrong, wasn't it? The test couldn't be correct... There had to be another explanation for it, right? Couldn't tumors or something set the test off?

He didn't even believe that himself.

Mello slid to the floor, test slipping through his fingers and clattering to the tile below. The double pink lines stared tauntingly up at him; he felt sick just looking at it. With a deep breath Mello pulled his legs up to his chest and closed his eyes, forehead resting against his knees.

He was pregnant.

With Matt's baby.

What the fuck was he going to do now?

-End Part 11-

**AN: **See, I promised an update today and i delivered :P Next update will be next week...after I edit it. Heh.

**Special Thanks**: Mello101012, Amour en Rayures, Mercory, Gurgicalcipher, maili-chan, Possessed4evr, MsMattJeevas, Aeleita, Zozabelle, XxCatalinaxX

Review?


	13. Part 12

**Suggested Listening:** Under the Sheets** by** Ellie Goulding

Part 12

~_Catalyst_~

The wait had been agonizing; though Matt knew it had probably been worse for Mello. It had been awkward sitting there after hearing that your _male_ best friend just might be _pregnant_ and even worse to listen to him say he didn't know whose it was; Mello hadn't said it in so many words, but when he'd said he didn't even know if he'd had sex...

Matt jerked in his seat, sitting up straighter, as the bathroom door creaked open and the light was turned off. Mello had been in there for nearly an hour. Mello was pale and shaky and he let the door swing open behind him. It confirmed what Matt hadn't wanted to admit; that Mello was pregnant with his child.

Absently he noted that the test wasn't on Mello's person, so Matt assumed the blond had dumped it in the trash. He would have heard if it had been thrown against something, even something so light as the test had appeared.

Mello didn't even seem to have noticed Watari's absence, the elder man having been summoned by L nearly fifteen minutes before, as he seated himself next to Matt. Matt tried to speak a few times but gave up after two failed starts. Really, what could he say? Especially without telling Mello everything?

More importantly, Matt had no idea what they would or even could do. Mello wasn't equipped to have a baby. He lacked the right parts to birth it, not to mention his body wouldn't naturally produce the right pregnancy hormones and a bunch of other things that the baby would need.

It was probably a miracle it had even survived that long in his body.

No matter how Matt looked at it, things were too complicated to keep it... but despite that, it _was_ his and Mello's.

"I see that the test was positive, as are the results I hold in my hand. I can't tell you how it is possible, but you are indeed pregnant and there are many things that need to be discussed because of it." the man smiled sympathetically but Matt didn't think Mello appreciated or even registered it.

"That will not be necessary. L has requested to see Mello immediately and you are to leave now." Watari interrupted as he walked into the room looking more fatigued than Matt ever recalled seeing him.

Mello swallowed audibly and nodded, not even looking in the doctors direction as he stood; at least not until the man grabbed his arm to stop him. "L can wait; there are a great deal of things that need to be discussed about the preg-"

"L's request is absolute and is to be carried out now. Your services are no longer required tonight. You account will already have the money transferred into it, I will show you the way out." Watari's voice was void of all usual kindness and Matt felt dread creep along his insides.

Whatever L wanted to say wouldn't be good.

Would he tell Mello he was out of the running? Or that he couldn't continue the case?

None of those options would sit well with Mello and Matt didn't even want to know what the blond's reaction to any of those would be.

Mello didn't seem to be thinking of any of that as he walked from the room and Matt, as he saw it, had no choice but to follow. It didn't matter if he hadn't been summoned as well; he wasn't going to let Mello see L by himself.

Though when they arrived Near was there and seated directly at the foot of L's chair as the detective sat in his odd style and ate lemons. "Please seat yourselves." L said as though he was hardly surprised to see Matt, and perhaps he wasn't.

Mello sat dutifully, though he seemed nervous, but Matt simply stood by the blond leaning on the edge of the couch.

"I have come up with a theory regarding your unexpected pregnancy." L told them, voice muffled by the fruit in his mouth. Matt stared straight ahead. A theory, and so quickly at that? Something wasn't right... something he couldn't grasp just yet.

He didn't have to look over to know that Mello had his entire attention on the man crouched before them. Matt just hoped that Mello didn't immediately believe whatever the detective said as truth.

"I believe the Death Note may have planted a portion of itself inside of you, as you were the only one to have a physical representation of the changes the notebook made. But the notebook could not control you as it might have another human, you are simply far too strong willed, instead it used the sperm of whomever you slept with as an opportunity of sorts in which to grow free of it confines of the book. In which case, the fetus is actually made from a portion of the notebook, which Near and myself believe is, at least in part, sentient."

Matt couldn't believe it. The notebook implanting itself into Mello, and using _his_ sperm, was able to take hold in Mello's body and grow? That just sounded insane. Completely nuts...

"Also, there is the matter of Mello's personality shift coinciding with the conception." L commented as though he were speaking about the weather.

"I concurred. Mello's strange behavior only began when the notebook was placed in his and Matt's room. While we have gotten clarity he has become unstable." Near said, an odd gleam in his eyes as he caressed a strand of hair.

What in the hell were they talking about?

Mello hadn't become unstable in any way shape or form! And Matt had yet to see either Near or L act like they should. He began to wonder, really wonder, if he had been right. If L and Near had been tainted so much by the corruption of the notebook that they were the ones becoming unstable. Their actions and personalities had changed subtly at first, L's harder to see, and Matt hadn't really wanted to believe they couldn't be trusted.

But between Mello and them, Matt would trust in Mello all the way. He _knew _the blond. And the only things that had changed were in the physical and that could be explained by the period and the newly found pregnancy.

"However, it is alternatively possible that because of the period you have been suffering from due to the notebooks mark on you, you have been given the ability to bare children, though I believe the former is more likely and it is prudent to get rid of it and your unwanted uterus at the same time. Who knows what might be unleashed if it is allowed to be born." L stated calmly, moving to snatch another slice of lemon and stuff it into his mouth whole.

Matt wasn't sure what to think.

"And what if it's not the death note, what if it is just a normal fetus?" Mello asked, surprising them all. Matt turned and openly stared at the blond, trying to read his expression. But Mello had seemed to have gained some control over himself, burying his emotions for the time being.

"Then it is an acceptable loss." L stated immediately, not even blinking. Matt lost all respect for the man in that moment.

"Fine." Mello replied, and in that moment Matt wasn't sure who he was more angry at. And yet, there had been something in the blond's tone that had suggested it wasn't the end of the issue, that he wouldn't go along with it. Maybe that was just what Matt had wanted to believe.

"It should be taken care of as soon as possible so there will be an appointment set up for you tomorrow. I believe it is said that one should not eat or drink twenty-four hours before surgery, so please make sure you do not consume anything else for the remainder of the day."

Mello nodded and though Matt wished the blond would fight the decision, he followed Mello from the room never-the-less. But it soon became apparent that Mello was anything but happy. The second they reached their room, not where Matt had expected Mello to go, Mello began to pace, an unreadable expression consuming his features.

Matt simply sat on his bed, game in hand though it wasn't even on, and watched him.

"Damn it... Goddamn it!" Mello swore violently, though it had come out as no more than a whisper. Mello was struggling, that much Matt could tell. But was it the fact that L wanted him to get rid of it, or was it that L had discussed things over with Near first and come to those conclusions?

Matt didn't know which way Mello's thoughts were going and it kind of worried him. On one hand, if what L had had said were true and it was a piece of the Death Note, then it was for the best. But if it weren't... then it was something he and Mello needed to discuss.

He couldn't keep it to himself. He couldn't let Mello make whatever decision without telling him. No matter the outcome and no matter how much his own thoughts were in turmoil over it.

"Mello... I need to tell you something." Matt forced the words to leave his mouth even as Mello seemed to have ignored him; and he just wished he didn't dread the next portion of it.

"I remember mostly everything...from the night we got drunk." It was so much harder to tell Mello than it was to think of telling him. "We were groping each other as we danced, and when we got back here... We had sex Mello." he admitted, daring to keep his eyes on Mello, who froze mid-step.

Mello was silent for a long moment before he spoke almost silently. "I know. I could never forget your eyes, that exact color of green..."

Mello had known. The entire time, Mello had _known_.

"Why didn't you say something...?" Mello was never the type to keep silent about something important like that, health problems aside.

"I'm not the only one who kept what they remembered a secret." Mello whispered, his fists clenched at his side. Matt hated seeing Mello like that, hated that he was the cause.

Matt sucked in a small breath and moved over to Mello. Shoving all the warnings in his mind away he pulled Mello into his arms. Mello didn't struggle, didn't do much of anything for the first few moments, but when he buried his face in Matt's neck and returned the embrace Matt knew things would be alright.

-End Part 12-

**AN: **just got off work. 8 am. Blergggg. I'm tired but I posted, happy? :)

If there are any errors I missed please tell me. K? 

**Special Thanks**: CMHerrera, Mercory, maili-chan, XxCatalinaxX, Possessed4evr, Aeleita, Zozabelle, Gurgicalcipher, Kari Twilight Mist, Amour en Rayures, MsMattJeevas, pandagirl77

Thoughts?


	14. Part 13

**Suggested Listening: **All in your Hands **by** Framing Hanley (a really awesome band, seriously, if I'm in a writers block I listen to them and it helps)

Part 13

~_Unplanned_~

Mello had long since gotten out of Matt embrace, though suffice to say he missed it, and they stood rather awkwardly in the middle of the room. Neither had said much since then and time was ticking away. They needed to come to a decision and long before morning. But with things being left unsaid their conversation was going nowhere, stalled in uncertainty.

"Matt. I don't want to get rid of it." Mello mumbled and cautiously looked up, being close enough to see Matt's eyes widen behind the goggles. Mello wondered if he'd made a mistake in telling the redhead and took a step back as dread crept along his insides.

Would Matt side with L?

But Matt didn't let him get far; taking two steps towards him and gently taking hold of his left arm.

"I don't want you too either... but..." Matt trailed off and Mello knew what he was thinking. What if it wasn't all theirs? Would they be able to get rid of it once it was born and it exhibited signs of being partially, if not completely, of supernatural origin?

Could they... kill it?

"Could you live with it, if we had to..." Matt trailed off not seeming to want to even speak of it and stared directly into Mello's eyes and despite everything Mello felt his stomach flop pleasantly.

"We'll have to, if it comes to that. Are we deciding that we are keeping it?" Mello felt the words stick in his mouth, his tongue feeling slow and heavy as nervousness took hold of him. What they were thinking was life changing in more ways than one. They would have to leave, go into hiding and do nothing that could be tracked by L. And then there was the baby itself; they didn't know how to care for one, they didn't know the first thing about them, or the pregnancy which was unnatural in and if itself...

"It's not just me, it's your body. Do you want to?"

Mello looked at Matt, really _looked_ at him, searching his features for anything that would tell him what Matt felt. But it was the small and seemingly unconscious rubbing of Matt's thumb across Mello's wrist that told Mello everything he needed to know for that moment.

"Yes." Mello smiled weakly at the slight relief that flickered across Matt's features. They were really going to do it. They were going to keep it. Mello forced himself to swallow normally and take a shaky breath.

"Matt, what _are_ we...?" and once the words had left his mouth Mello could have kicked himself. Matt was hardly stupid and would immediately infer the meaning.

_Are we friends or...?_

"I don't know. I really don't know." Matt touched his forehead to Mello's and though the answer hurt, at least it was truthful.

"I liked what I remember of the night but I'm confused about certain things. You've been my friend for so long that it's difficult to wrap my mind around anything and I... Can we just figure out what we are going to do and get back to this once we're safe, please?"

Mello had been wholly unprepared for that admission and simply nodded, as much as he could with Matt leaned against him. "Can you get passed L's security, even if it's only for a short time? Otherwise I don't think we are going to get far." Mello finally asked, mind working for their most current problem per Matt's request.

"I can get through it for _maybe_ forty seconds. But if L even remotely suspects that I'm attempting to hack his system in advance I won't be able to do it. We can't make it obvious that we are leaving. The only place he doesn't have cameras is in our rooms, of that I am certain."

Mello hadn't known that though they could make use of that lapse. L should have put cameras everywhere, even the bathroom; Mello thanked whoever was watching out for them that L hadn't.

"We can't look too suspicious so we can't take anything that is obvious. Double up on clothing but not too much that it looks bulky." Matt told him, seemingly thoughtful.

"Matt, your games-"

"Can be replaced." the redhead smiled at him, though Mello knew it would be hard for him without his games.

"Are you at least taking one of your handled and a charger?" Mello prodded as he moved away from the redhead and over to his dresser where he eyed the clothing inside. There were so many things he wished he could take but when it came down to it they could all be replaced as Matt said. And it wasn't like he would be able to fit into half of them in a few short months anyway, Mello thought ruefully.

"Yeah, I can fit two of them in my vest pocket and they both work with the same charger. I can probably fit a few games in as well as the disks are small. But we really need to make sure we have essentials first..." Matt trailed off and Mello supposed it was because he had taken off his shirt.

L was observant and would wonder why that particular long-sleeved shirt wasn't on him when he left the room. Mello was only glad that he hadn't been wearing a short-sleeved one. He was able to fit two t-shirts and another long sleeved on underneath before it became too much of a hassle to try.

He doubled up on everything else he could; boxers, socks and the like. He managed to squeeze a pair of jean on underneath two pairs of sweatpants, which were actually Matt's. He hid a few bars of chocolate on him as well as a pack of Matt's cigarettes, though he hated that the redhead smoked them.

When Mello was finished he looked over to see Matt struggling to shove his vest overhead and held back a laugh. Matt looked like he had gained about twenty pounds in the last five minutes. It wasn't bad enough where he thought L would notice immediately, however the longer it took for them in the hallways the easier it would be for L to tell something was wrong.

"Mello, I think we should stage a fight."

Mello cocked his head to the side in silent question.

"Well, why else would we be wandering around the security doors. If you were running down the halls and I was chasing you it wouldn't seem as odd as you are known to loose it a bit when pissed off."

Mello frowned at the assessment, no matter how true it was, though could see how it made sense. "Alright. Do you have everything we need? Money, laptop and-"

"I've got everything that I can think of. We could spend all night at this and I'm sure we would forget at least one thing we'll need later. But I have the main ones like our IDs."

"What about passports? We can't stay here..."

"We have no choice for the moment. I'll see if I can't find someone who will do them for us since we can't take commercial transportation."

He must have let his expression slip as Matt smiled softly at him as he spoke. "We'll be alright, but right now we just need to get away and everything else will fall into place later, ok?"

Mello nodded to the redhead and though he glanced around the room once more for anything possibly forgotten, he couldn't see anything. Mello already had the most precious things to him hanging around his neck and the other standing beside him.

"Ready?"

Mello nodded. He knew they would have to act as though they'd fought but Mello wanted it to look more authentic, so as he grabbed the door handle he grinned slightly at Matt before wrenching it open and letting it slam against the wall; from Matt's expression he'd expected something like that.

"Leave me the fuck alone!" Mello snarled, putting as much of his anger into his words as possible. As Matt stepped towards him Mello threw his fist, slow enough where he knew Matt wouldn't actually be hit by it but fast enough where it wouldn't seem faked.

He was surprised as Matt caught his arm and spun him, pinning him to the wall. Mello knew it was part of the act but it still sent his heart racing.

"And why should I?" Matt asked, voice low and deep; Mello swallowed and forced himself not to think of other applications where Matt's voice had sounded like that.

"Get off me!" he shoved Matt hard and hoped the redhead wouldn't get hurt. Mello didn't stick around to see and bolted down the hallway. He knew where they needed to go and knew that Matt wouldn't be far behind; Mello also knew that L would be watching.

And probably Near and Watari.

Mello ran as fast as he dared, taking corners almost too quickly to keep his balance and racing down steps as he heard the feet pounding away behind him. He fought to keep the smirk off his face; he was in no danger and if not for the situation could almost say it were fun as he hadn't been able to stretch his legs like that in quite some time.

Mello was partially breathless as he reached the meeting place, hands on his thighs as he bent over to ease his breathing.

Matt skidded to a stop hardly ten seconds later but didn't pause like Mello had to catch his breath, instead going around Mello to quickly fiddle with the security panel. It was a race against time and each second seemed like centuries; Mello expected L to round the corner with Watari aiming a gun at them at any moment.

"Got it!" Matt grabbed his hand and left no time for talking as they were suddenly running through the streets and despite the severity of the situation Mello couldn't help but feel relieved.

With Matt he didn't have to be at his best, he didn't have to do case after case or be at the top of the class to have his approval. With Matt, Mello supposed he could be happy…

"Come on Mello, we just need to get far enough away to take a taxi." Matt's breaths were harsh and Mello's hand was warm where Matt gripped him; Mello couldn't begin to answer and simply let himself be led. He didn't know where they would be come morning but knew that as long as they were together everything would be alright.

-End part 13-

**An**: I was going to post this yesterday but figured no one would read it XD

**Special Thanks**: Kari Twilight Mist, maili-chan, Zozabelle, Amour en Rayures, XxCatalinaxX, MsMattJeevas, CMHerrera, Mercory

Review?


	15. Part 14

**Suggested Listening**: All in your Hands **by **Framing Hanley (a really awesome band, seriously, if I'm in a writers block I listen to them and it helps)

Part 14

~Papers~

Matt sighed again as Mello twitched at the slamming of a door and the shouts in pitchy Japanese that rose from the other side of their hotel wall. They were lucky to have a place for the night, but the area wasn't exactly the best.

The door slammed violently once more before everything was silent, deathly silent. It wasn't hard to be on edge especially as Matt was certain L was looking for them and every suspicious sound caused the paranoia to grow.

They had to get out of the country, and soon, but it was proving difficult.

It wasn't as though they could simply apply for the passports they needed and expect L not to notice it. And neither could they simply stay inJapanas it was now ground zero for L's search. The detective would know how hard it would be for them to get what they needed on their own.

Matt hated him.

Though Matt was conflicted on even that; was it L or was it the notebooks influence? Where did one end and the other begin? There was no way to tell as Matt had not met the man before the Kira case started so it was impossible to say what would have occurred otherwise.

Matt tore his thoughts away from Mello and L and the couple that had been yelling next door; they needed a way out. His hands shook as he typed, so fast he was misspelling words left and right and having to backtrack every few seconds; it was counter productive. Matt had liked to think he was good under pressure but this pressure was different and if he failed it was more than a slap on the wrist at being caught in a hack; not that he would get caught easily.

Matt was looking for someone, anyone, that could potentially get them out ofJapan. Everything needed a passport. Everything legal.

And even some of the not so legal ways needed it as insurance _just in case_. Matt was having a hard time finding hints of anyone willing to make forgeries too, even the temporary kind. It was a huge mess.

But he couldn't stop; not when he could see Mello peering through the dirty yellow curtains with that nervous energy of his. Mello had every right to be weary of the outside noises. But chances were that if L found them he wouldn't let them know in advance. There would be no warning, no sounds to alert them or any time to run.

Matt took a deep breath as quietly as he could and forced himself to calm down, if only a little. Getting panicky, no matter how warranted it was, wouldn't help. The sound of something hitting the wall and breaking glass startled them both and Matt was willing to bet that in the near future one of the people in the room beside theirs wouldn't be alive.

Matt was actually surprised his laptop was even working at the moment after having dropped out from under his vest and hitting the street earlier. Matt glanced irritably at the scratches it now had and his finger slipped during the distraction causing the mouse's pointer to go astray; it clicked on a side link. Some flashing banner that held promise of infecting his computer with something. Silently cursing himself Matt stared at what had come up. A site advertising the sale of private jets. Matt's eyes widened and he quickly exited the page to look up specifics on charter jets. It was something he hadn't thought of, something that was definitely feasible.

His eyes scanned the page quickly taking in all the details as fast as he could process them. Types and sizes, styles and models and capacity and how far they could travel and what was available inJapanfor use. So many things to memorize and understand but Matt's mind soaked it up like a sponge.

They could get out that way, through private charter; they really could. If he could find the right person. Everyone had a price; Matt just had to make sure his was higher than the authorities, than L's. Because if it wasn't, they probably would never leaveJapanalive, not if L and Near were as deeply affected by the murder notebook as it was beginning to seem.

The kind of people he was looking for would be hard to find online, as they would need to seem legit or risk immediate consequences, and maybe they were legal until a price was given. There were always inconsistencies with those people, just one thing that didn't add up that would tell Matt when he had found exactly what he was looking for.

But whether L had found them first or not would remain to be seen and Matt really hoped he wouldn't be too late. Because the only other alternative was for them to hide inJapan. While L was there. Where L had infinite resources. Where L had been living for over a year already.

"Matt."

Mello's voice was soft so unlike his usual tone that it caused him pause, made him look over. Mello was leant against the windowsill, curtain drawn tight in his hands, and he stared at Matt with an uneasy expression. Mello looked too skinny now that he was back to wearing only the one pair of clothing, the rest piled messily on a chair along with Matt's own extras, including his vest. It had become too hot to keep them on and Matt knew they would need something to carry the clothing in if they wanted to travel with them.

"I know you want to rush but if work yourself up into a frenzy it will be that much harder to come down from. If we look like we are in massive trouble even the most greedy of people won't give us the time of day, right?" Mello's skin was pale and the longer Matt looked at him the more drained Mello seemed. The situation wasn't just stressing him out. Why hadn't Matt thought of that?

"Mello why don't you lie down? I know you won't sleep, but it might be good…" Matt's hands were frozen over the keys, head turned away and he couldn't seem to get the words to flow from his lips anymore; couldn't just say what he wanted without making Mello believe he thought him weak. And he didn't.

Matt tensed at the sound of movement behind him, fully expecting Mello to protest; so when he heard the rusted springs of the cheap hotel rooms bed squeak in protest he was confused.

"Just try not to get jittery and any more paranoid alright? You are a terrible liar on a normal day and acting like you just robbed a bank won't help once you find what we need." Mello sighed, head pillowed on his arm that was bent under his head.

Mello acted as though he _knew_ definitely that Matt would get them out of the situation. Matt doubted Mello knew how much that meant to him, to be trusted in so completely.

Matt forced himself to slow down. He lit a cigarette and simply let it burn as it was held loosely between his lips; the smell alone was partially calming. Matt hadn't wanted to light them around Mello but short of doing all his work outside just to smoke them it was the only option he could think of for the moment.

He'd never really had a problem keeping calm as things at Wammys hadn't been all that exciting but there had been a few occasions where things had spiraled out of control, mainly because of something to do with Mello and Near or that he'd been reminded of something he would have rather forgotten and Matt had always had a hard time calming himself afterward.

There were things Matt had seen, while certainly not the worst in the world, that had wired a panic switch into his system. And sometimes Matt just wasn't able to help it when he got too anxious. Normally he would just game until the feeling went away, an escape, but with that not an option it had begun to eat at him despite the way he had tried to ignore it, pretend that he wasn't stressed.

Mello had known.

Mello had _always_ known but had never acknowledged it.

Matt just wished it hadn't taken a situation this dire for the blond to say something. It had always kind of hurt to be ignored, to have to try and fix it himself.

Matt shrugged the thoughts off knowing it was hardly the time or place for them and instead continued on. The nicotine was helping his nerves and the slight nervous jerking in his leg had subsided as the seconds ticked by.

His breathing was slower as he scrolled down another web page feeling more and more like he _might_ have just found something. Matt had gone through a lot of the legit websites, some advertising more than just one charter business, and none of them had so much as mentioned the one he'd just found.

One that had been mixed in the very last pages of the search engines results.

The more Matt read the more certain he was that there was something off with that business. Their prices were dirt cheap in comparison to the business he had confirmed as legal. No one, not even the best, could afford to have prices that low if they weren't getting something on the side or doing less than legal things business wise to get more money.

If there wasn't something illegal going on Matt decided he would quit smoking.

Whoever owned the business obviously couldn't outright advertise if they did some not so legal things; that would have been idiotic to say the least, so Matt understood he would have to call and when they got there hope that not having passports wouldn't be an issue.

Matt twisted, fully intending to tell Mello of what was going on but found the blonds eyelids firmly shut and his breathing soft; Mello was asleep and had been for at least a few minutes. Matt worried his lip for a moment and decided to simply let Mello sleep for a while longer. Mello wasn't needed for the initial call now that Matt was as calm as he was going to get in that situation.

Matt was not going to risk waking Mello though so he would move into the bathroom. Matt carefully gathered everything he would need and shoved what he could in his pockets before gently closing the laptops lid and placing it underarm as he stood; the tiny stubbed remainder of the cigarette still in his mouth.

Matt hesitated, eyes locked on Mello, and couldn't resist brushing the stray strand of hair out of Mello's face, smiling as Mello sighed slightly in his sleep. Matt was frozen in spot at the almost overwhelming fluttery feeling that rose into his chest and had to take a deep gasp of air just to remember how to breathe.

What was it about Mello that caused such confusing emotions in him?

Matt slowly backed away and breathed a sigh when the bathroom door shut behind him, blocking Mello's sleeping form from his view. Matt sat heavily on the bathtubs edge and stared at the door still picturing Mello's thin frame with that shoddy blanket draped halfway across his waist and his blond hair that never quite stayed out of his face.

Matt didn't want to label it something more than it was but he could no longer profess to be completely unsure of what he felt.

It was more than the urge to cradle the fragile looking blond in his arms, or the urge to press his lips to Mello's, or the fluttery feeling he continually got when he looked at him or the way Mello was able to read him better than anyone...

It was more than lust.

It was more than their usual friendship.

But due of past experiences... Matt was hesitant to call it that _word_.

And yet, that was all it could be.

"Why can't things ever be easy?" Matt muttered, resting his head against the dingy bathroom tile.

-End 14-

**AN**: I am alive! XD I was working the weekend so I didn't have time to edit this, and my God did this need editing. I probably missed stuff, but I was more concerned with making this understandable. You wouldn't believe the half formed sentences I left when calling this chapter complete :D

My beta has her own life issues so I'm on my own, forgive any errors I've left, or point them out. I will eventually go back over this story once I don't remember what it's supposed to say. XD

**Replies**:

Mercory: I know… but honestly I don't see them. I got over the chapters 3 times but I think I miss things since I know the words so well XD

chiakaiyuki / Razorblade Devotchka: thank you! I have read my fair share of mpreg and I wanted something different rather than 'so and so SOMEHOW got pregnant' XD And well, I think I have a thing for evil-ish L….

**Special thanks to reviewers**: Possessed4evr, Mercory, kikyotwosoul, Kari Twilight Mist, amos222, CMHerrera, Gurgicalcipher, chiakaiyuki, MsMattJeevas, Amour en Rayures, pandagirl77, Razorblade Devotchka, XxCatalinaxX

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	16. Part 15

******Suggested Listening**: Uphill Battle******by** Saosin

Part 15

~Phoenix~

"Matt stop flicking your lighter it's beginning to annoy me." Mello stated calmly, though if he were an animated character Mello supposed he would have had one of those tic marks above his head.

He couldn't blame Matt as he was nervous too, but Matt was too obvious in showing it.

Matt had woken him, after having apparently falling asleep though Mello didn't remember doing so, and hardly given him any time to blink the sleep from his eyes before ushering him from their motel room. Mello had been confused as to what was going on, worrying they had been tracked but knowing it was unwise to ask such things in the cabbies presence, until they had been dropped off at a private airstrip.

Matt had found someone.

That had been about twenty minutes ago. They were waiting for the man to get off the phone with another potential client; and though all Mello wanted to do was waltz into the room and rip the phone from his grasp he stayed put by Matt's side.

Time ticked by maddeningly slow and by the time the man had put down the phone, Mello being able to see through the offices open blinds, Mello was ready to pull his hair out.

"Sorry for the inconvenience, please step in here and we can talk out the finer details before getting underway." they were ushered inside the small cubical-like room, though only the man seated himself.

"From what you told me you were hoping to get out of Tokyo tonight or the latest tomorrow morning, correct?"

Matt nodded to him and when neither of them said anything more the man sighed, making an effort to look put out; as though doing this for them was going to mess up his schedule, which it likely wasn't.

"As I said on the phone, while I may have the lowest prices it is still going to be costly, especially to get you out of here tonight. Now, payment methods-"

"There's one thing you should know, we don't have our passports. That won't be a problem will it?" Mello asked with a quirked eyebrow, leaning heavily into the doorframe with his arms crossed. He knew Matt would have handled it just fine but he wanted everything over with. Wanted to know if they had to hightail it out of there and scour Japan for anyone willing to help them...

The man looked them over for a second, as though trying to decide if they were worth the effort. "If you've got the money I've got the transportation." was all he said and Mello watched as Matt grinned.

"How much?"

Mello stood back and let Matt finagle with the man, appearing as though he _had money but was not super rich, which was the correct thing to do. They would be taken advantage of otherwise, the price always upping, or even blackmailed into something because of their lack of passports. They had to wait until half the money had been transferred to the mans account before anything else proceeded._

With Matt that only took a few minutes.

The grey haired man, going by Tanaka Okita which Mello doubted was his real name, grinned toothily and closed his laptop, locking it inside a safe that was, until now, unnoticed by Mello. "Have you got everything you need? Because we leave now."

"We have everything." Matt said, gesturing to the small duffel bags by the door; Mello still didn't know where Matt had gotten them from and wondered if perhaps it was best he didn't know.

"Alright, please follow me then." Mello went to grab the bag when Matt snatched it up, slinging it over his shoulder with a tight eyed grin. Matt was tired, as tired as Mello still felt and yet still felt the need to haul that thing everywhere simply because his laptop was in it.

How Matt had ever fit his laptop underneath his vest, with all of that clothing, and kept it from dropping as they ran all across L's skyscraper, was something he'd have to remind himself to ask.

Mello wished he had his own laptop but knew anything of any real importance would be stored on Matt's jump drives which the redhead undoubtedly had.

They walked steadily behind Tanaka and over to a_ large airplane. Mello hadn't expected something that big, but then again, the smaller airplanes simply couldn't handle the long ranged flights, so anything less than a jet wouldn't make it. Mello could just make out smaller airplanes further off down the strip but didn't trust the look of them. It was probably best they were leaving Japan and not going somewhere closer._

At least the ride would be comfortable in the jet.

He followed Matt up the movable steps and felt himself sway in a bout of vertigo. He hadn't eaten anything in a while and his body was beginning to protest the treatment. Mello felt his stomach drop as he was reminded of the life growing inside of him.

There were so many things they needed to know about it; what, if any, pills he had to take for the pregnancy, if he even could take them as his body wasn't made to have children; what foods he would be allowed, and God forbid they try to take away his chocolate-

"Mello?"

Mello snapped out of his thoughts and looked at Matt who wore an odd expression. Mello realized he had stopped at the top of the steps, hand gripping the railing tightly as he faltered. Mello grinned tiredly at Matt and shook his head.

There was nothing they could do about food for the moment so there was no sense in bringing it up. Unless there was food stocked on the plane... he might be able to get away with peanuts.

But with Tanaka shoving their bags into the overhead compartment in the first row of what Mello would have called first class, though the entire plane was sectioned off in first class attire, and urging them to strap in as he did the preflight analysis and take off, Mello didn't have much time to check.

So he settled for loosely buckling in and staring out the window of the darkened city, lights shining from various lamps and buildings in the distance.

Matt, despite the large amount of room around them, sat beside Mello and tucked his PSP into the small compartment in front of him. They had seated themselves in the second row to make use of the small seat compartments.

Mello knew Matt didn't like long trips, something from his past dictating the dislike, and thought the redhead was handling it fine and perhaps had even forgotten the reason for the dislike in the chaos of the last few hours.

Whatever it was, Mello was happy not to see that strained and mostly apathetic expression he usually got when a long trip was even mentioned; he doubted Matt even realized he did it.

Tanaka announced the start of take off, taxiing over to the runway, and before Mello knew it his ears had popped and they were finished climbing and holding at a steady altitude. Mello had only ever been on a plane twice in his life and neither had brought him to anything good, well, Matt was the exception to that Mello supposed.

His stomach rumbled quietly and painfully reminding him of his need of food. Mello frowned and simply rubbed at it discreetly, hoping it would calm down and wait the eight something hour flight. It didn't cooperate and he hunched over a little at the slight cramping.

"Are you ok Mello?" Matt was leaned in front of him, expression blank but his tone holding worry. He hadn't meant to bother Matt.

"Just hunger pains." _I think, Mello added silently._

"You should have said something if you were hungry, we could have picked up something before we left." Matt chastised, winching at a deep angry rumble Mello's stomach let loose. Honestly, if it wasn't bothering him so much Mello might have thought it was amusing in a way; didn't that type of thing only happen in the movies and television?

"I'll go see if there is anything to eat. Any preferences if I can find something?"

"Wait Matt, I can get up and look for myself-" Mello stood, nearly bumping into Matt and despite the way his body swayed he stood defiantly in front of the other.

"You will sit here and wait. I'm not blind Mello; I can see how unsteady you are. Honestly I really think you would have already killed yourself studying if I hadn't brought you dinner all those times." Matt gently forced him to sit and though Mello obeyed he frowned at the redhead.

Mello doubted Matt had meant anything by it, other than to point out his apparent suicidal drive, but it reminded Mello of the title he _could _have had. Though if it meant treating people quite like L did, perhaps it was for the best...

Matt seemed to realize his mistake but only muttered a quiet 'I'll be right back' as he retreated through the black curtain that sectioned off the front of the plane.

Mello sighed heavily and let his head flop back onto the seat; the headrest was hard and uncomfortable despite being encased in grey faux leather. Mello wished that everything could just hurry up and be over. That they could find a safe place and ride out the storm that was L and hope that he never tracked them down.

That or L and Near lost whatever remained of their sanity and offend each other for some reason, thus taking out both problems. Mello doubted that one however. He closed his eyes and chewed on his bottom lip as his stomach rumbled again.

Mello really hadn't noticed how hungry he had gotten and it had only really started after he had gotten some sleep, Mello could only begin to guess why. It had already bypassed annoying and on to painful so Mello doubted it could get any worse then perhaps passing out, and that had to be far off. Probably.

Mello blinked open his eyes at the sound of movement and stared at the large grin stretched across Matt's face. He had a tray in hand and what looked like those gourmet meals on plates. First class was good for something Mello supposed.

There was a few things presented; what appeared to be three meals made and portioned off into two trays, one for him and the other obviously Matt, as well as some various small airline grade snacks. Meaning it wouldn't taste all that great but it would fill them up. "Thanks..." Mello muttered almost silently, hesitant to begin eating despite being hungry.

"It wasn't a problem. Not eat before I shove it down your throat myself." Matt told him and Mello had to believe Matt was only half joking from the slight way Matt's mouth had twitched, almost into a frown.

With a weak smile Mello grabbed the plastic fork and dug into the vegetable dish, with some odd tasting brown sauce, and interjected random bites of rice with it. It wasn't the worst meal Mello had ever had, that was for certain.

Matt collected the plates and leftovers afterwards and disappeared back into the small kitchen-like area; Mello hadn't even attempted to help him after the look Matt had given him earlier. Matt was usually patient but it was best to leave him be when he was adamant about something.

Matt came back a few minutes later with a small trash bag full of snacks, which was shoved into their duffel bag, and a blanket and pillow; Mello didn't know the latter had even been aboard.

Nor had he realized just how cool it was in the plane until Matt had draped the blanket across his lap and the warmth had spread instantly across the covered areas. Mello worked on tugging the blanket across himself, cocooning himself in the warmth and watched on curiously as Matt shoved the divider out of the way between the two seats and placed the pillow on his lap.

Mello, despite himself, flushed.

"I'm not a baby in case you have forgotten, I don't need a bottle and nap-"

"Mello, I'm only going to say this once, but you look like shit. I don't care if you had a twenty minute power nap or not. You're exhausted from the last week as it were and with all the running around and adrenaline in your veins you are starting to get shadows under your eyes. Lie down and rest. You don't have to go to sleep but _lie down."_

And Mello obeyed, never having had Matt speak so forcefully with him and knowing that Matt was also on his last nerve.

Mello awkwardly leaned across his seat to Matt and placed his head on the pillow, feeling more embarrassed than he had in a long time. He didn't protest when Matt drew the blanket further across his form and over his shoulders, or when Matt hesitantly rested his arm across him. Even if Mello hadn't not-so-secretly liked it he understood that there was no other place for Matt to rest his appendage comfortably.

But regardless of the reason, Mello relished the contact.

And Matt was right, Mello admitted silently, he _was_ exhausted. With a small sigh Mello let his eyes fall shut again and hoped that they could both find the time to sleep on the flight because he doubted the next few days or even weeks would give either of them much rest.

-End 15-

**AN**: I updated on time! I am getting no sleep but I updated, yay!

Anyway, this goes for all chapters: until I get a beta I will continue editing this myself so expect errors. I go over these 3xs but I tend to skip over things since I know what the story is supposed to say. XD

Also, 166 reviews! Keep em' coming!

**Special thanks to reviewers**: chiakaiyuki, Mercory, killing u with umbrellas, XxCatalinaxX, Possessed4evr, Zozabelle, CMHerrera, Kari Twilight Mist, MsMattJeevas

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	17. Part 16

**Suggested Listening**: Rolling in the Deep by Adelle

Part 16

~Duel~

Matt had not slept once during the entire flight, instead using the time to look up transportation in America as well as shelter for them on the laptop. It would be late night when they got there, the time shift being vast, so apartment hunting had been out of the question, though getting a taxi wouldn't be despite the hour.

The flight had been easy going with no turbulence at all and Mello had been able to rest up, which had been a good thing. Though the blond had been a little groggy when he woke.

No one had been around as they stepped off the jet, as they were at a private airport, and once Tanaka had been paid he let them go on their own way. And though Matt wanted to go right to the hotel he'd booked he knew they needed to cover their tracks as much as they could. He still felt guilty dragging Mello around the city like that even though Mello did not complain once.

They made a total of six false stops before Matt was satisfied they wouldn't be immediately found. He had made reservations for a medium quality hotel, wanting them to be able to shower and sleep peacefully for the next day until they had secured a place to stay, though it would be out of that particular city...

.

Finding an apartment hadn't been hard but getting someone to rent to two teenage looking boys had been a problem even with their fake Ids. No one wanted to rent to them, especially without proof of a job, at least none in the better areas.

"Matt, it doesn't have to be the Palazzo. We just need a place to sleep; we can't stay in motels the rest of our lives."

He knew Mello was right about the hotel but Matt hadn't wanted to be in a 'bad' area; for the moment it didn't look like they had much of a choice. The only places that weren't sticklers for your private information were the apartments for rent in the lesser areas in and out of the city. The ones where it was easy to slip into the cracks and murders weren't uncommon.

It had taken two tries but they had finally got a lease for the first months rent cash down as well as a deposit for anything happening to the place. _Like bullet holes_, Matt had thought to himself.

And that was why they had found themselves in a fully furnished shithole of an apartment, the previous owner needing to leave the country for _some_ reason, almost two weeks after fleeing Japan.

There was a problem however. Despite there being two bedrooms, there was only one bed.

"You are not sleeping on the couch. It feels like sitting on a stone slab after only five minutes, it will kill your back." Mello stated, hand on his hip as he snapped off a piece of chocolate. He was back in leather for the time being, though he had been a bit put out at having to get a size larger than usual, though there was no real noticeable changes to his figure in Matt's opinion.

But his opinion didn't mean much in that area.

"Well I'm not going to sleep on the floor Mello-"

"Who the hell said anything about you sleeping on the floor? The bed is more than big enough for the both of us until we get another one. We have more pressing issues than a bed right now though..." Mello trailed off, looking more than a little uncomfortable.

Matt felt oddly content knowing he would be sleeping next to Mello, despite Mello's mention of their other problem. They needed to find a doctor and soon. They had no idea about the pregnancy, even having looked it up was unhelpful as it couldn't account for Mello's lack of feminine hormones.

The longer they waited the better chance of a miscarriage.

And neither of them wanted that... unless it _was_ the Death Note's creation...

"Look, we'll search around tomorrow. Let's worry about getting the place stocked with food and other stuff we need for today. Ok?" Matt really wasn't going to sleep on a bed that someone else had used unless he had one of those bedbug covers and new sheets and the works.

They were in desperate need of new clothing and many other things the apartment was lacking even with the furniture.

"Makes sense..." Mello mumbled, nibbling the edge of the bar as he thought. Matt was certain he was making a mental list of the things they would need. Matt hoped it would be a quick shopping.

.

Matt had indeed been correct and yet it still took them four long hours to shop for everything they needed; well everything they could think of for the moment. Matt was certain they were still missing a ton of stuff. But they would sleep well that night on expensive sheets with new comforters to ward out the cold.

And eat frozen dinner from the microwave. Because both of them had been nervous enough going out in public and didn't want to order out and risk having any more people potentially recognize them. Sure they had bought a few things worthy of disguising them while in public but it hadn't helped them for going out to buy them.

Though in all honestly, being seen couldn't be helped since they were in need of an Obstetrician, which would require going out. But the least exposure they had with the public the better, disguises or not.

"Matt how the hell am I supposed to pick one of these doctors, I don't know if ones better than the other!" Mello frowned, brows furled, with his arms crossed as he looked up from the computer. Regardless of the plan on searching for one the next day, Mello had begun to look online for ones nearest them.

The problem was, there were quite a few in that area alone.

Mello was currently looking at the ones out of state; if they were found they didn't want to be in the same city so they at least had a little bit of time to escape.

"I don't know. Look up the credentials or something... isn't there a site for this kind of stuff?" Matt shrugged. He didn't really see what the big deal was, pick someone who was board certified and be done with it. Well, that and someone who wouldn't find it too odd that Mello had a dick and no vagina...

"You know what, fuck it. This one looks good." Mello had randomly clicked on a doctors name and grabbed the address and phone number. Matt had to hide a smile. Neither of them had any idea what they were doing; hopefully whoever their Obstetrician ended up being _did._

"Why don't you get a few more names form that area just in case you don't like this person." Matt suggested carefully. He had known Mello for years, and in doing so, knew _how _Mello was. He didn't exactly get along with people and if he couldn't get along with his doctor it would be a _very long _nine months.

And Matt doubted either of them could handle having to switch Obstetricians every month just because the blond pissed them off.

Mello hmm-ed in response and Matt shook his head. Things had been going so fast the past two weeks that Matt hadn't had time to sit back and think things through. It had just been one crazy thing after another and it was almost odd now that things had slowed down. Matt wouldn't say they were calm but they had definitely stepped down in intensity.

He left Mello to his muttering and furious clicking of the laptops mouse, and took two random frozen entrees from the freezer to cook in the oven. The place really wasn't bad, considering the area they were in. And oddly, Matt hoped they wouldn't have to move. The place seemed like... well _theirs_.

Matt really wasn't sure he wanted to delve deeper into what he felt for Mello and yet he knew he had to decide what to do soon as it wasn't fair to Mello who Matt had all but promised an answer once he'd come to one. Matt just wished the answer was simple.

He leaned against the wall and watched Mello as the food cooked, never once taking his eyes from the blond's form.

.

.

"Thanks for making dinner..." Mello mumbled and Matt knew Mello felt a bit awkward about saying it. Mello had never been one to say thanks, and Matt supposed that it was perhaps a Wammy's House thing. Without all the pressure to succeed crushing him the blond was relaxing more. Well as much as he could.

"It's fine. You were busy." he replied, letting out a small smile as Mello made a disgusted face.

"Don't remind me. I'm so sick of looking at all those names and dealing with credentials." Mello's face contorted and his nose scrunched up as he spoke. It must have gotten on his very last nerve.

Matt didn't comment on it though, knowing from experience it was best just to let the blond vent. Instead, he headed for the living room and to the uncomfortable couch to sit and watch some television. He was tired, moving from place to place and running around for weeks was physically taxing no matter how much sleep gotten; but Matt just wanted to relax for a bit rather than simply sleep.

He was hardly surprised when Mello flopped next to him after he'd put on the Food Network and a show about cake battles came on. Mello was _addicted_ to chocolate and Matt had seen at least one cake made of it. He wondered though, just how much Mello would be able to eat of the confection during the pregnancy.

Sure it had been fine up until then but what about after they had gone to the Obstetrician? Matt winced at the thought of a chocolate-less Mello. Godzilla and the apocalypse could not compare.

Matt didn't know for how long they sat there watching the food channel but it was long enough for Mello to have gotten halfway to sleeping right there, having slumped into Matt's side with his eyes shut and breathing slow and left over food nearly slipping from his lap.

Mello's body was warm and felt good where it pressed against him.

But they couldn't stay there, if only for the fact that just about every bone in their bodies would be sore afterwords. They really did need a new couch. Hell even bean bag chairs would be better.

"Mello, we can't sleep here.. Mello?" Matt gently shook the blond, watching as Mello's eyes flew open before fluttering a few times. Mello groaned and buried his face into Matt's shoulder before stilling for several long seconds and abruptly sitting up with a sigh. Matt had forced himself to stay still throughout it all, the seconds lasting an eternity with Mello's nose nudging his arm and that warm breath heating the fabric of his shirt.

It had sent Matt's heart fluttering and even as Mello stood up, wobbling slightly in his half-asleep state, and it hadn't calmed. Matt knew he would need to pick apart his feelings and soon; he _knew_ this and yet every time some small reaction happened to remind him... he just couldn't.

"Matt hurry up. I don't want to be woken up by you stumbling into bed later!"

Matt swallowed harshly at the hardly innocent sounding statement but complied as Mello wouldn't hesitate to give him hell should he actually wake him from sleeping. Matt walked in just as Mello was pulling boxers up his legs.

Matt shoved aside the image of the blond's naked form his brain supplied from memory and instead stripped down to his own boxers. The situation was completely awkward and the silence only seemed to increase as he got into bed, leaving the covers drawn for Mello as the blond was preoccupied with setting an alarm.

Matt supposed they couldn't very well just sleep as long as they wanted if they hoped to accomplish anything. Mello laid on the other side of the bed, the light going off and the covers being tugged upwards.

Matt knew he wouldn't be able to sleep like that for long with the tense atmosphere, if at all. And with Mello turning over every few seconds, it didn't seem he would be able to either. But that was the problem with being stubborn. The absolute unwillingness to back out of a situation, even when it made you uncomfortable.

If it had been a movie, there would have been crickets chirping in the background.

As it were, however long later, Mello huffed out an aggravated sigh and surprised Matt by rolling over to his side of the bed and curling up by Matt's side, body cool but warming from their shared heat.

Matt's face heated up but he didn't move away.

He _didn't_ want to examine or label what he felt for Mello because Matt knew where it would lead and there were three words he never wanted to think of or hear again, not even being said to another person...

Three words that Matt knew was stupid to be afraid of.

Three words... that fucked with his head.

-End part 16-

**AN:** so I bet everyone is REALLY curious about Matt's past now and how it ties into his fears... XD well you will just have to wait.

ALSO FFN has been stupid the last few days and I havent been able to upload new documents so thats why this is late, not to mention it hasnt been sending out alerts so im going to pimp my new stories here that i posted.

**Dog Days**: Everyone in the direction the man was looking suddenly fell to the ground, dead. Matt couldnt breathe, couldnt move, couldnt get his goddamn legs working to run-:The dog days are done, Can you hear the horses cuz here they come. Now a TWOSHOT by demand MM

**Aftertaste:** Just when Mello thought he might give in and that Matt might take him right there against the wall the redhead backed off that familiar blank look washing over him, turning to stare out the window as though the last few minutes had never occurred. **SEQUEL to Bitter and Taste**

please give them a look?


	18. Part 17

**AN: I posted 16 and 17 today, if you have not read 16 yet go back :D**

ALSO FFN has been stupid the last few days and I havent been able to upload new documents so thats why this is late, not to mention it hasnt been sending out alerts so im going to pimp my new stories here that i posted.

**Dog Days**: Everyone in the direction the man was looking suddenly fell to the ground, dead. Matt couldnt breathe, couldnt move, couldnt get his goddamn legs working to run-:The dog days are done, Can you hear the horses cuz here they come. Now a TWOSHOT by demand MM

**Aftertaste:** Just when Mello thought he might give in and that Matt might take him right there against the wall the redhead backed off that familiar blank look washing over him, turning to stare out the window as though the last few minutes had never occurred. **SEQUEL to Bitter and Taste**

please give them a look?

**Suggested listening**: Love is a Ladder **by **Pat Monahan

Part 17

~Two~

Mello had woken up alone in bed and had shoved the slight feeling of hurt into the back of his mind. What had he expected? Matt to be lying there, holding him with a smile on his face? Not even in his dreams...

Matt had yet to do anything one way or another regarding a relationship and it was beginning to ware Mello's nerves thin. He just wanted to know it they were going to stay as friends or not. It was at the point where the waiting was hurting worse than not having something more. This limbo... was killing him.

Mello didn't hear any sounds from the apartment and wondered where Matt could be, and upon a check he was no where in the apartment, though Mello wasn't worried quite yet. If L had found them Mello knew he wouldn't have woken up in their bed.

Instead he used the time to dress himself in some of Matt's new clothes, still refusing to buy larger sizing for himself when he could still damn well fit into his leather; though he knew the leather was not a good idea for a doctors visit.

He chose a pair of jeans and a plane black t-shirt; Matt never wore anything other than stripes so Mello knew the shirt had been bought with the knowing that he would raid Matt's clothes. To Mello's dismay the jeans were a bit more snug than they should have been though he still needed a belt. He irritably placed a hand over his stomach and though it was mostly flat he could feel the slightest change; he was the one most in tune to his own body after all.

In hardly a few months there would be a large bulge there. So much for being slim. With a sigh Mello dropped his hand and stalked from the room, sock-less, only to walk right into Matt who he hadn't even heard enter the apartment.

"Didn't you hear me? I only scratched the lock like four times on the way in." Matt commented, steadying Mello with a hand on his shoulder though Matt backed away from all other contact.

"Obviously not." Mello muttered, his mood already sour.

"I got breakfast so we can leave as soon as you're ready. We'll eat on the way." Matt commented weakly, having obviously seen Mello's expression change. Mello sighed heavily. The day was just not going to go well, was it?

"Are we even allowed to eat in a cab?" Mello questioned while he shoved on socks and a pair of sneakers he'd gotten the day before. He looked up at Matt, who was sporting a large grin and somehow felt he should be worried.

"I bought a car. So it really doesn't matter what taxi's allow or not."

Mello stared at the redhead for a few seconds, trying to see if he was joking or not, before deciding that grin wouldn't be on Matt's face if he was. His shoulders slumped and he dreaded to see what kind of car Matt had picked up.

"Alright fine, let's get going." he muttered, almost amused at Matt's behavior over a car. He supposed the food was in the car as there were no good aromas noticeable in the apartment, just the lingering smell of cleaners and new apartment smell. Well as new as that particular place was going to smell.

He followed Matt from the apartment, locking the door behind him and as they reached outside he noticed how cool it had gotten. He had forgotten how close to winter they really were, though it wasn't cold enough to _need_ a jacket.

Matt walked only slightly ahead of him and Mello rose an eyebrow as they stopped in front of a cherry red Camaro. Mello shook his head. Of course Matt would buy something like that. It was hardly ideal for shoving a car seat or the like into the back, but it's not like they couldn't get another car...

A car seat.

_What a sobering thought_, Mello thought.

Shaking off that train of thought Mello sat in the passenger side, noting the bag of food and the drinks in the holder, and though the thought to strap in crossed his mind he didn't.

"I got us the same thing so it doesn't matter what you choose. The top drink is yours though." Matt commented and Mello almost felt childish enough to grab the lower one; instead he took the one mentioned as his. It was hot chocolate. He looked at the redhead, who gave him a grin as he started the engine.

Mello simply took a larger sip of the hot beverage and sighed as the warmth spread down to his stomach, warming him from the center out. Only once he was halfway through the hot chocolate did he even think of grabbing the food, which Matt had already dug into and had half a sandwich sticking out of his mouth as he drove.

Mello rolled his eyes and took one for himself, noticing there was still another left in the bag, and nibbled experimentally at the end until he decided it tasted alright and took a larger bite. He was still getting used to the difference in foods in America, everything seemed to be about fast foods and unhealthy snacks, so it was hard to find things to eat that weren't covered in salt of filled with disgusting byproducts.

"Mello, stop glaring at the food. It's not like you have to eat it everyday. Once a week wont kill you."

Mello scowled at the redhead, who had a large grin as though he were trying not to laugh, and settled back into the seat. He knew it would be a while for they arrived at the first office, as they were going two cities over, but he just couldn't relax.

He hadn't been able to find much online as to what might go on during the visits. Most sites only stated tests as well as well as looking at the parts Mello didn't have. Though Matt had at least come up with the transgender route to explain the uterus and 'male' pregnancy and it helped that he looked a little feminine, though it was still a sore spot for him. It wasn't perfect but it was better than saying he had woken up with a uterus inside him one day...

"Hey Mello, you do realize you need to make appointments with these types of doctors right?" Matt asked as he turned onto the highway. Fuck. Mello knew he had forgotten to do something. And from Matt's laugh the redhead had known it.

"Good thing I woke up early and made a few, right?"

Mello turned to look at Matt, wide eyed. "Yes Mello, I do sometimes think of these things." Matt told him seriously, though from the twitch of his lips he found it amusing.

"Thanks." he muttered. It would have been a wasted trip otherwise. And really, despite not liking doctors, he just wanted to get it over and done with. Though he did realize there would be more than one visit. He wasn't naive.

He finished off the sandwich, taking hold of the hot chocolate, and contented himself with staring at the passing scenery until Matt pulled off the highway and down one of the exits. Matt blew the stoplight and sped down the street, much to Mello's annoyance, and kept looking at a piece of paper that Mello assumed were directions.

They were in an entirely new area so Mello wasn't surprised. It was more of an obsessive thing rather then actually needing the directions that Matt had probably memorized anyway. Mello forgot what city they were in, and if they had technically passed the state line, but the scenery hadn't really changed.

It was about two hours since they had left the apartment and just coming up to the first office. The check in had been painless, as had meeting the doctor. However, explaining that he was pregnant 'transgender' had not. The doctor had given a sort of dark look to him, which even though he wasn't transgender, Mello hadn't liked.

Needless to say they hadn't stayed there.

"Well that was eventful." Matt commented dryly, pulling into another parking lot after nearly another hour of silence in the car. Mello frowned, getting out of the car silently, and hoped that not all the places they visited would be 'eventful' or there would be a problem.

Maybe it was just because the other doctor had been a guy? Weren't they generally more aggressive and disapproving towards those things? Mello wouldn't really know as they had been brought up in Wammys house which was prey much as unbiased as you could get despite the competition. And Mello had certainly never heard his parents views on those things...

"Let's get this over with." he mumbled harshly, hearing Matt lock the drivers side door. He let Matt deal with the receptionist and stood silently beside him. With the way things had been going for them, he wouldn't be surprised if this place had the same results as the last one, and probably the one after it.

"The doctor will see you now, she doesn't have any other patients until the afternoon." the receptionist smiled brightly and wished them luck. Mello thought she had to have just started for the day to be that cheerful.

Mello took a deep breath and entered the room the receptionist had pointed to, Matt trailing behind him. There was no one there but Mello had no doubt the doctor would arrive soon. He lent against the wall as Matt sat in one of the chairs beside him.

They waited maybe five minutes before a woman, appearing in her early thirties, entered the room and closed the door. "Mello and Matt I presume?" she asked, smiling at them, clipboard in hand.

"Yeah, look. I'm going to get this out of the way before we even start so that if you have a problem with it we can go find someone who doesn't." Mello huffed, he was already irritated, and dare he admit kind of nervous, and he didn't want any more delays if they had to go to one of the other offices.

"I'm transgender, and I didn't find out I was pregnant until just after I'd had my reconstruction therapy." Mello felt rather odd saying that though knew nothing else was even close to believable. They had even looked up things on the surgeries and knew he was cutting a _very_ fine line with it as he should not be healed that well after two months, and if she saw his penis it wouldn't have any scarring or any of the tell tail signs there should be; but it couldn't be helped.

"Honestly, I don't have any problem with it, it's my job to help people through their pregnancies not judge them on their choices. From your rather affronted demeanor you haven't been lucky with other Obstetricians." she looked more concerned rather than disgusted. It calmed Mello's nerves a little.

"Now have you had a clinical pregnancy test or just the home version?" she asked.

"Both."

"Alright, I'd still like to do one here if that's alright with you?" though it annoyed Mello, he nodded. He understood that she needed to confirm the pregnancy especially with a case like his.

"Before I do that, since you are transgender, I have concerns about the pregnancy that need to be addressed. If you would please sit we can begin." she gave him an encouraging smile and Mello complied silently, seating himself in the chair next to Matt. She didn't seem even a little skeptical, though he hadn't had to _prove_ anything; Mello supposed there would be a time upcoming that he would.

"Firstly, I'd like to ask if you are still taking testosterone?"

"No. I had stopped a few weeks before the surgery. I figured that was the reason for the pregnancy." he answered carefully. She nodded and wrote something on the clipboard. "Have you been feeling sick lately, any cramping in your abdomen or anything that you wouldn't normally feel?"

Mello shook his head. The only thing was new was how tired he had been. She looked contemplative for a moment, almost as though she was going to ask another question, instead she stood and went into one of the locked draws to remove a packaged needle.

"I'm going to run blood and urine samples to know what hormones you are producing; I will be doing this in accompany to the pregnancy test. You will probably have to take hormone shots to support the pregnancy if you are keeping it, which if you are here seeing me I can assume that you are."

Mello nodded to her and gave her his arm after she'd pulled on the latex gloves. He was surprised she hadn't called someone in to do the blood work for her, as most doctors did. At least he had assumed most doctors did, all the ones in movies he had seen did at least...

"I'll show you to the bathroom where you can fill this cup and then I'll run this all down to the lab, OK?" she held out a plastic cup and with a frown Mello took it from her. There were going to be tests after tests weren't there?

He didn't even glance at Matt as he left the room, following the doctor, a Patricia Darling, to the bathroom. It was a small bathroom, hardly bigger than the one in their apartment, but since all he had to so was pee in a cup he supposed it didn't really matter.

With a barely concealed sigh he shut the door, having no problem filling the cup, and was back out in no time. He was told to simply go back to the room and she would be there once all the tests were in about a half hour.

If there was one thing Mello hated, it was waiting.

.

.

"Congratulations, you are indeed pregnant. Now, for the blood and urine results. I saw some rather concerning things."

Mello had almost rolled his eyes, of course there was something concerning. Why wouldn't there be?

"You're body has taken very well to whatever hormone treatments you were on, because you are lacking in some very important hormones. You are making the absolute _bare _minimum of Progesterone, a hormone needed to support the pregnancy, though your Estrogen levels are surprisingly good. Honestly its a miracle you have carried the fetus for this long. With your body the way it is, it's as though you were born male."

Mello flinched at the last portion, knowing all too well he was male and had _always_ been so.

"So what can be done about it?" he questioned. He already knew taking hormones would be part of it, he just didn't know what else would be included. If Mello ever saw another Death Note in his life, he was going to burn it and take great pleasure in doing so.

"I'm going to proscribe Progesterone injections, daily injections, until I believe your pregnancy is stable enough that you can move to the pill form. You will also need to take a series of vitamins daily and need to watch your diet in order to keep the fetus healthy." she told him, hands folded as she leaned slightly against the counter behind her.

"What are possible side effects of the injections?" Matt spoke up from beside him and Mello berated himself for not having thought of that, mind swimming with too much information.

"Well the most common side effects can include cramps, headache, constipation, vomiting, breast tissue enlargement, thirst, increased appetite, drowsiness, mood swings. Basically everything you'll find in pregnancy either way. I can get you the information on it before you start the treatments if you'd like?"

Mello nodded to her. He wanted to know _exactly_ how miserable he was going to be, or if there weren't more serious side effects. Though he was already less than happy about hearing of the mood swings and growth of breast tissue; he did _not_ want breasts. End of fucking story.

"I will do that before you leave here today, as I would like to get you started on the injections and vitamins today if possible. The sooner you start this the less risk to the fetus. There are payment options we can discuss as well but I would like to do that at the end."

Mello knew stuff like that was expensive, especially for there to be 'payment options'. He hoped Matt had money on him...

"Now because of the higher risk you have and how far along you are, I want to do an ultrasound today as well to see how many there are and if they are forming correctly. I'll go get the ultrasound technician and then we can proceed."

Mello froze at that. He hadn't thought of there being more than one, had not even considered it in the slightest; nor had the doctor previously mentioned the possibility. Matt nudged him, elbow going into his arm and Mello noticed that there was another woman in the room. He had spaced out.

He stood as the doctor beckoned him to the reclined seat to the side, legs wobbly. Mello seated himself, letting her lift his shirt and place the familiar cold gel on his stomach. He hardly listened to the ultrasound technician explaining what she was doing, having already gone through an ultrasound when he'd found out about the uterus.

Mello was a little nervous, more than a little nervous, knowing what was in there, what he would see, but not how_ many_ he would see. He jerked a little, head whipping to the side, as Matt took his hand, giving him an uncertain smile. Matt was probably as anxious as he was and yet he still tried to calm him, Mello vastly appreciated it.

"There we are." the technician murmured. Mello looked up and was relieved at only seeing one object in the grainy picture of the womb. It was nothing more than a small blob at the moment, well a blob to Mello, though the technician pointed out the brain showing up as a large' hole' on the monitor, as well as the distinguishable lumps that were fingers and elbows, however alien looking they were.

She said that though it was tiny now, he should expect it to grow relatively fast; if a grand total of nine months could be considered fast.

Mello didn't quite know what to feel at seeing it. He wasn't exactly excited, more worried. Though there was also annoyance, something bubbling inside of him that he'd repressed since the first night. It shouldn't be there, inside of him, feeding off of him like a parasite. The damn thing housing the baby was forced on him by something supernatural-

Matt squeezed his hand and it eased Mello's frustration on the matter, reminding him why he was keeping it besides the fact that it could be a normal fetus. It was also Matt's baby. If anything, that was a great reason to keep it.

-End 17-

**AN**: ok, so lets get one thing settled now. I have never been nor will I EVER be pregnant, and I never paid any attention to the subject as I'm not interested in it in the least. But I HAD to look up EVERYTHING for this fic.

My understanding on some of the more technical stuff is loose at best and only aided by what i drudged up on the net and asked my sister who has been through this more than enough times. I didn't just choose the first site i saw and slap the facts into this fic. I looked at multiple sources to help my poor tiny brain wrap around the weirdness that is pregnancy, including the hormones involved, and tried to make it as realistic as i could. But really, when you have a murder notebook implanting uterus's in guys and helping in creating pregnancies i think the actual details of said pregnancy are allowed to have some flaws. XD

Though really, i think it's hilarious that some people are more ready to accept a note book that kills when you write someones name in it than a guy getting pregnant. Really? Honestly? I think thats fucking hilarious. :P

I'm done now...


	19. Part 18

**Suggested Listening: **18 Days **by** Saving Abel******; **Too Much **by** All Time Low

~Face~

It had been odd seeing their baby on the screen; the black and white image of that tiny fetus becoming ingrained in Matt's mind. He knew it had made Mello uncomfortable, having seen Mello tense, to have to finally accept that it was true. That it was real.

Before they were going on tests alone, very accurate tests nonetheless, but they hadn't seen _it with their own eyes. It had been surreal to say the least. And though it was a lot to take in, a lot to think about given all the things both of them would be responsible for during the pregnancy, Matt didn't feel nervous._

After the ultrasound the obstetrician had gone on to give them the needed prescription slips to get filled as well as the predicted due date, February 5th, though they would probably schedule a c-section for a week or so earlier.

That had been nearly two weeks ago.

Nearly two weeks of Mello taking the injections and having to take what he called 'horse pills'. Matt could agree with how large some of the pills were. And while nothing really notable had happened yet, Matt _had begun to see the changes in Mello. It was more than just the nausea and cramps he'd gotten from the injections and even how quickly Mello was starting to show, it was his softening emotions and how quickly they changed, as though he were bipolar._

It was expected, or so the obstetrician had said, as Mello's body wasn't used to the hormones 'anymore'; though it was still an odd sight. Matt knew it would only get worse the longer Mello took the hormones, which would be throughout the entirety of the pregnancy, but it couldn't be helped.

Matt hated seeing how annoyed, dare he even think angry, Mello got after he'd lost control and thrown something across the room or rubbed furiously at his eyes at something that shouldn't have upset him; it wasn't something that Mello could control. Mello understood that but was still bothered by it a lot.

"Fuck!" Matt turned his head at the pained curse to see Mello nearly doubled over, clenching the door-frame in a white knuckled grip as though it were the only thing keeping him from the floor.

Matt hesitated for only a moment before he rushed over; he ignored the weak protest and lifted Mello into his arms, depositing him in their bed. The cramps had gotten increasingly worse after every injection and Matt was tired of seeing Mello in pain. There was always that small percentage of people who had stronger than usual side effects and Mello seemed to be one of the lucky ones. Matt knew what the information on the injections said, knew what had been told to them, but he couldn't accept that there was nothing to be done other than wait it out.

"I'll make you some tea, alright? I'll be back in a few minutes." He left Mello on the bed, the blond having nodded faintly and let the door swing halfway shut. Matt bypassed the kitchen to find his phone and quickly dialed a number he had already memorized knowing he would probably have to call many times after this.

But the obstetrician told him there was noting that could be done, that all medications Mello could possibly have taken she didn't usually recommend for normal pregnancies and certainly not Mello's higher risk one, that he would just have to wait until his body had gotten used to everything and the symptoms simmered down. She stated that it shouldn't be more than a few weeks at most; though the emotional outbursts would only increase as per normal.

Matt was less than satisfied with the answer and if he threw his phone into the couch petulantly no one was there to see it. With a sigh, he grabbed a cup, and after filling it with water, dropped a tea bag in it and placed it in the microwave to heat.

Matt drummed his fingers irritably on the counter until the timer went off, at which time he put a lot of sugar and a little milk in the cup and gave it a quick stir. Mello didn't even like tea, but it settled his stomach and eased the cramps a little so the blond tolerated it.

Though with more sugar than was really necessary...

It wasn't a fix all and only took the slightest edge off the pain but it was better than nothing.

He took the cup into the bedroom and from the knowing look on Mello's face, knew the blond had expected him to call and had expected him to get a negative answer; Matt wondered when his thoughts had become so transparent that Mello could read him so well, so easily.

Mello reached out for the tea and Matt watched as the blond downed the entire cup once it was in his grasp. It was always like that with him. It would probably work better if it were sipped, but even with all the sugar in it Mello still hated the taste.

"Thanks Matt." the blond mumbled and inched the cup to the edge of the bed where Matt moved it to the bedside table.

Mello let out a small hiss of pain, curling further in on himself and into the blankets making Matt really wish there was something more he could do to help. He had to wonder though, was Mello really just unlucky with the injections or did it have to do with the lingering effects of the Death Note?

Matt felt useless and normally it wouldn't bother him but when it came to Mello it always did.

Matt gently climbed onto the bed and seated himself by the pillows to at least give the blond some company; he was a little surprised when Mello decided to use his lap as a head rest. Matt didn't really mind though, not even the slightest bit uncomfortable with the closeness for once, and didn't even think as his fingers touched Mello's back, rubbing slight circles into the t-shirt covered skin.

Mello let out a small sound of appreciation though Matt could feel how tense Mello was just from his back muscles alone. The cramps usually were set off a little while after the initial injection and always worse if Mello didn't have enough food in his system. It was never a sure thing though, and how long they lasted always differed as did the intensity.

But if the obstetrician was right Mello wouldn't have to deal with it for too much longer.

Matt watched him for a while, eyes locked on the blond's stomach though he couldn't see it through the fabric of the shirt. The obstetrician had explained that how much and how quickly Mello would show depended on a lot of things from the position of the baby to how strong the uterus was and so on.

Matt wasn't sure what was in play at the moment but it had seemed as though Mello had gone to bed one night with a flat stomach and woken up with a bump. It had been amusing to watch Mello poke and prod the mound. That had been only a few days ago. Things were going so quickly...

A little while later Matt watched in slight amusement as Mello's eyes fluttered briefly before closing altogether, his breathing slower though not quite that of sleep. He had taken to resting a lot more since the injections began and Matt assumed that it would continue on throughout the pregnancy as well; it wasn't something to be concerned with or so they had been told.

Matt rested his hand above Mello's hip, the nerves at the tip of his fingers having gone numb from the constant circular motion on his back. And though Matt's legs had begun to tingle and fall asleep Matt didn't dare move any more as Mello seemed comfortable and he had no wish to change that.

And if he were truthful with himself, he knew he wouldn't have wanted to move either way. He could get used to this, the strange comfortableness between them as well as the slight intimacy that had begun to integrate itself into their friendship...relationship?

Matt frowned at the thought, his heart doing a flip making his chest uncomfortable and heavy; the memories that swam just beneath the surface bothered him, though he knew they shouldn't anymore; he'd had enough time to get over them...

He wanted Mello, that much he was certain of...

What he didn't know was if he could take the steps to make it more than that.

Being friends, close friends, was comfortable and didn't drudge up the past. Being more than friends, lovers, scared him. The only time he'd ever given into intimacy was when he hadn't been thinking, been completely drunk and unable to remember...

"Damn it Mello, you complicate _everything." he hissed uncharacteristically, mouth going to the now sleeping blond's ear, lips nearly touching the soft skin._

"And yet I... I.." his voice cut off, teeth barred and clenched, as his fingers dug lightly into Mello's hip. He couldn't say these things to Mello's face. And he couldn't speak them aloud even to himself.

But he knew the truth, no matter how painful it was to admit.

-End Part 18-

**AN**: And here we have chapter 18, I want to thank the lovely Amour en Rayures for being my new beta and helping make sense of my odd thoughts :D

Next chapter will be out... um... when its out XD

**Special Thanks**: XxCatalinaxX, chiakaiyuki, 9shadowcat9, MsMattJeevas, Possessed4evr, killing u with umbrellas, Kari Twilight Mist, Zozabelle


	20. Part 19

**Suggested Listening: **I don't care**by **Fall out boy

Part 19

~_Venom~ _

Mello was going crazy. Had been for the past few weeks. He'd had nothing to do other than watch TV and deal with the damn injection side effects and whatever could hold his attention in-between all the prenatal tests.

If he had to piss in one more damn cup or have another needle stuck in him, he was going to kill someone.

He pulled out Matt's computer junk, a large bin filled with things Matt _swore _was organized, and searched around for the tiny jump drive Matt had with the Kira information on it. But with all the wires and microchips and crap in there, he couldn't find anything.

"What are you looking for?"

Mello jumped slightly at the sound of Matt's voice and turned to see Matt leaning against the wall with his arms crossed and an unlit cigarette in his mouth.

"For your damn jump drives!" Mello snapped irritably.

"You could have just asked." Matt scoffed, though he hardly sounded offended. Mello sighed and stood back as Matt lifted the bin and replaced it in the closet, taking out a small case that had fallen to the side at some point and unzipped it; inside were multiple jump drives. The case was new, something Mello knew had to have been bought just after they'd moved in, same for some of the jump drives, but he recognized the old Kingston one with the gold strip.

He was correct in assuming that was the one he had been looking for when Matt picked it up and tossed it to him. "I leave them in here so they don't get dust in them, but the case always seems to fall off the shelf no matter where I put it."

Mello nodded and moved over to his laptop, a new one that was better than the Wammys issued one that he hadn't been able to take. Things had been kind of odd between him and Matt as of late. It wasn't a bad kind of odd, but it wasn't a friendship kind of odd. And yet Matt hadn't said anything otherwise on the subject, and Mello just didn't want to deal with it while he was in a good mood.

Instead, Mello wanted to do something moderately productive that didn't require him to move around too much. He was feeling good, but he found that if he moved around in excess too soon after an injection, the cramps were worse. He had asked about it but was told to simply take it easy for a few more weeks; in short, they didn't have a fucking clue. The thought that it might have to do with the Death Note lingered in Mello's mind no matter how much he attempted to ignore it.

Mello didn't expect to get much done in the way of the case, which he now included L and Near in as their minds had been compromised, but he needed to do _something. _And seeing as the world's top three detectives weren't making any progress, and undoubtedly wouldn't be, he and Matt would probably be the only ones to even get close to uncovering the mystery that was Kira.

Mello put the laptop onto the comforter and climbed onto the bed, settling himself on his side and against the pillows. He was sore and a little achy but was otherwise side effect free so far that day. Mello wondered once he was over these side effects if the more normal pregnancy problems would kick in. He'd already had to deal with some nausea, and he'd rather not have to deal with that and the possible morning sickness. He rubbed at his face with a small sigh; it was no use going over what could happen; he would just have to wait and see.

Sticking the jump drive into the laptop Mello pulled up only the files on the previous taskforce, and set to work on reading through everything again. Mello figured he and Matt could now shove themselves into the category of former taskforce as well.

There really wasn't much, and a lot of it was conjecture, but that was where he needed to start. He couldn't find Kira without finding the taskforce. They had been told by L to find Kira, but to Mello, it was the same as finding the taskforce.

If he didn't know what happened to them, then he couldn't accurately look for Kira. And yet there was no trace of them. Anywhere. He worried his lip, eyes going over the documents word for word and getting re-familiarized with them. He hadn't thought too much on it before, life getting in the way of such things, but he and Matt had assumed that if the taskforce had disappeared, it would have been together and in a large group despite the possibility of their minds being affected.

But what if Yagami and his son had split off from the main group?

This was of course going on the assumption that they had been affected by the note at that time or that their altered thoughts hadn't gone in an entirely different direction.

Or that they were ever affected by the note in a mental way at all.

Mello didn't know why he hadn't though of it before... they had only been assuming that the taskforce had left because their minds had been afflicted, but what if they had left before that had happened, for another reason entirely?

There had to be a reason L wasn't concerned about their whereabouts or, at least, seemingly unconcerned and dismissive.

For all appearances there was no trace of the taskforce, yet Mello knew there had to be somewhere. Everyone left a trace, especially people who didn't have L's connections on their side; Mello just had to find it. He knew it might take a while, but it wasn't as though he didn't have all the time in the world to research it.

They had previously started with the airports, looking into outgoing flights and such, but Mello now thought they should have started smaller. If the taskforce was making an escape, they couldn't have gone on foot the entire way; they would have needed some sort of transportation.

Probably used a few blocks from L's place as he and Matt had done when they'd escaped.

There might be footage of them on nearby traffic cameras or store surveillance or even from around their homes from days before that might give some clue as to where they had gone. Mello wished he'd had the time to look more thoroughly into it before all hell had broken loose.

He knew Matt would be a lot of help with his programs for searching through the surveillance, but for the moment, Mello was content to search on his own.

.

Mello didn't really know what had started it; one minute he'd been taking a break from the laptop, in the kitchen getting a drink, and the next he and Matt were having a full scale screaming match.

He just couldn't take Matt's indecision anymore, and once the yelling had started, everything he thought on the matter just tumbled out. Mello knew that if he wanted to, he could blame everything on the injections, all those foreign hormones fluttering around his body and wreaking havoc with his emotions, but really he'd just… snapped.

He had only gotten angrier when Matt had tried to calm him, and the only thing accomplished had been Matt yelling at him. It had surprised Mello for all of five seconds before he had snapped back. Mello was never one to lie down and take being screamed at, and even as the voice in the back of his head told him to calm down and talk things out, he hadn't been able to stop himself until he'd said something he hadn't meant. Well, not entirely.

"If you can't figure out what the hell we are, then maybe it's better that I leave! You are acting like a fucking coward and making things more complicated than they need to be. Are we friends with a baby, or are we something more like those little touches and gestures you give me suggest? I can't deal with this limbo anymore! You need to fucking decide or I'm gone."

Matt's expression had frozen as his face paled, making Mello had wished he'd never said it.

The fight had evaporated instantly afterwards leaving them in awkward silence. Mello swallowed thickly, not knowing what to do other than to attempt to apologize.

"Listen Matt, I didn't-"

"Yeah you did, Mello. You meant every word." Matt's voice was void of all emotion, and Mello felt guilt creep into his belly like an angry snake. He was annoyed that he even felt guilty. Matt had brought this upon himself and yet Mello hated seeing the grimace settle on Matt's lips.

Matt never responded, and Mello figured that the silence was enough of an answer for him. He slowly shook his head, guilt turning to hurt. Mello turned, fully intending to leave at least until both of them had time to think, but Matt's hand on his arm stopped him.

"Look, I just… sit down and..." Matt trailed off and hadn't let go of his arm, and though Mello let himself be led, he was far from happy about the situation.

"I need you to just sit here and listen. There is a reason that it's hard for me to figure these things out… for me to be... indecisive." Matt said everything with a pained look, as though just trying to explain things hurt him. Mello paused, thoughts gathering and latching onto the one thing he knew this had to do with: Matt's past.

Mello couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it before. But instead of saying something, he kept himself quiet as Matt sighed heavily. Mello would sit on the edge of the couch and wait for whatever Matt wanted to tell him to unfold if only because he cared for him, friendship or otherwise.

-End 19-

**AN**: you should all love Amour en Rayures for sorting out my writing. I seriously think I'm half out of my mind when I write stuff sometimes :D

Anyway, next chapter is an interlude of Matt's past. Long awaited eh?

Thoughts?


	21. Interlude: The Past

**Suggested Listening**: Great Escape **by** Kevin Rudolf

~Interlude~

Mail had never known his mother or father; father having died before his birth and his mother dying giving birth to him and his twin. Nor had he ever met his twin, the little girl dying of some kind of heart defect before she had taken more than 100 breaths on her own.

He had been passed on to his mother's family despite the grandparents on his father's side trying to get custody of him.

Mail wished they had.

He had never really been hugged much as a child, his aunt's military husband under the impression that it lead to 'Nancy boys'. Nor had he ever been overfed, though he was hardly starved.

He had two older cousins, one five years his senior the other the other seven. They were nice whilst their mother was around but played rough when their father was there. Mr. Helvick didn't like that Mail was more interested in games than rough housing, despite how young he was or that he bruised easily because of slight anemia.

It hadn't been the life he could have had, but neither was it horrible. It was tolerable.

At least it had been until he turned five and his aunt filed for divorce, taking her two sons with her and leaving him with her husband. How Mail _hated _her for that.

Things had been rather tense and silent at first until Mr. Helvick began bringing his 'sympathetic' friends over for poker, some game Mail could never quite understand, and getting so drunk he passed out on the couch after watching some game on the television.

He'd always had to make sure food was either left out for him or made before Mr. Helvick's friends came over, otherwise he missed dinner entirely.

None of that was ever truly bad, not really. Not at first.

It was only when most of the guys had left, one man usually staying later than the others, and Mr. Helvick was unconscious on the couch did things get bad.

A hand covering his mouth, one undressing him, touching him down _there_, and doing other weird things to him that Mail knew were bad. Things that left him sore and hurting and scared.

Mail had never been told 'I love you' by his family, but every time Mr. Helvick was passed out on the couch, and that same work associate came over, he was told over and over that he was _loved_ until he couldn't stand the sound of those words anymore and the feelings it invoked. If this was the love that adults spoke of, he never wanted to feel it himself.

The incidents had left Mail a little _off_.

He never slept anymore the nights when Mr. Helvick's friends came over and always locked his door, sitting with his back to it. It never really stopped anything. Locks could be broken.

And then came the days when Mr. Helvick threw himself back into his work, needing a babysitter for him as he was not old enough to spend the time by himself, and that same man volunteered to _watch_ him.

It was always a long hour and a half drive from their house to his. The drive that felt like it took forever and made it felt like he was being abandoned again. Especially when the man did the same weird and frightening things to him each night he spent there with no one around to prevent it.

No one ever found out, and if it happened too many times to count, no one but Mail would ever know.

He had been sent to Wammys after Mr. Helvick was killed in a duty related incident.

He couldn't say he was unhappy about it.

Not at all.

-End Interlude-

**AN: **so now we have Matt's past and why he struggles with the deeper emotions XD. I could have made it more detailed, but i really felt like it didnt need it, what happoned got across without me having to actually put it in here and i think its better this way.

Thank the lovely Amour en Rayures for looking over this or you would end up with stuff like 'cough' instead of 'couch' XD

**Special thanks (over the 200 review mark!)**: Zozabelle, kikyotwosoul, CharizardCyndi, XxCatalinaxX, Aeleita, MsMattJeevas, CMHerrera, killing u with umbrellas, Kari Twilight Mist

Thoughts?


	22. Part 20

**Suggested Listening**: I Belong To You (LANY) **by** Kevin Rudolf; Stranger **by** VersaEmerge

Part 20

_~Stranger~ _

"I know I probably shouldn't still be bothered this much by it as it has been years since it happened. I think it's just because I was so young at the time. That's why I have trouble with..." Matt trailed off, swallowing harshly and barely lifting his head as he finished the story. He almost didn't want to see Mello's reaction. Even remembering it left him feeling... dirty.

"Matt." Mello called sharply and Matt had no choice but to look up.

"Anyone, I don't care what age, would be affected by something like that."

Matt only nodded, not being able to speak just yet. There were so many emotions flying around his mind and he was having a hard time pushing some of them away again.

Mello hugged him suddenly; wrapping slim arms around Matt and pulling him close. Mello's slightly swollen stomach pressed into Matt's side in an oddly comfortable way. Matt leaned into him unconsciously breathing in Mello's comforting scent.

"I'm sorry I made you bring up something painful."

Mello's voice was so very sincere that it made Matt smile a little. "It's alright. It's time I try to get over it." He shut his eyes and returned the embrace. He really wanted to get over it and wished he wasn't so afraid to admit what he might, what he _did _feel. But those words haunted him. He didn't want to connect those dirty words with Mello.

"Matt..." Mello's voice was quiet and hesitant, as though he didn't want to break the small peace between them; Matt knew what he wanted, knew that they'd had the discussion in the first place because of it...

"You don't have to tell me you love me or anything, just tell me what I am to you. Are we friends or what?" Mello muttered to him, voice soft and caring, something Matt figured the injections had caused as no matter how happy the blond was, his voice had always had an edge to it even when he was sincere. At least it had before.

Matt took a small breath and dropped his arms from Mello, pulling back to look at the blond whose eyes appeared even more blue up close. Mello's head had tilted to the side, eyes full of question and fear, something Matt hadn't expected.

He brought a hand up to Mello's cheek, brushing the skin softly and leaned in until their lips were almost touching. "We're not friends," he whispered, watching as Mello's eyes widened.

Their lips connected hesitantly, the contact lasting for only a few split seconds before things were suddenly hot and ravenous. Mello's hands behind Matt's head pushing him closer, their mouths moving fervently against one another, and their breaths harsh through their nostrils and hands roaming over places they hadn't touched since that one drunken night.

Matt wasn't sure who had started it, and he wasn't sure who had ended it, but he eventually lay atop a breathless Mello, whose hands were still underneath Matt's shirt and slowly running his fingers along his sides.

"If this is what our kisses are like, imagine everything else?" Mello huffed out in a small laugh, smile splayed across his lips. And Matt had to agree, and though he was partly a coward for not being able to tell Mello in words, he was relieved. Regardless of the outcome he knew he would have been with Mello the rest of his life, as friends at the least.

Matt had never really thought on it before, but he had never been able to picture himself in the future without Mello by his side since they had become so close all those years ago.

Mello's face scrunched up suddenly, and Matt thought of the cramps. They hadn't been too bad as of late and had definitely been going away, but they still occurred occasionally along with the tiredness.

He kissed Mello once more, tongue darting across the blond's bottom lip before he rolled to the side and nearly fell off the bed in the process. Mello's expression was odd but not pained which Matt knew was a good thing. Still he reached over Mello to pull the blankets over him despite the raised eyebrow he received at the action.

It wasn't really all that new to be taking care of Mello in small ways; he used to do it back at Wammys too. When Mello would pass out over his textbooks before a test, or forget to eat, or when he needed to be dragged to the infirmary for some broken bone or another that he was too stubborn to treat on his own. Matt was used to it, but the intimacy was new.

Having Mello curl into his side, small smile tugging at his lips, or the arm he draped over Matt's stomach. That was never something Matt had even dreamed of before. He wasn't sure how long, if ever, he would have recognized his feelings if they were still at Wammys. And regardless of all the trouble that had occurred because of the Death Note, maybe it had been a good thing.

As Mello's breathing slowed, body completely relaxed beside him in the comfortable silence, Matt decided it had been a good thing. Because in no other scenario could he have pictured this.

None.

.

.

Their kisses were still hesitant even days later, both of them unsure of it was OK to 'steal' one, but they were getting used to things. And though nothing more had been said about his past, Matt knew Mello still thought of it. It was unavoidable, and he didn't blame Mello. It wasn't something anyone could forget, but Matt was happy not to have to speak about it anymore.

Mello had been spending a lot of time on his laptop, and Matt knew that something was beginning to frustrate him though Matt hadn't asked what. They all needed their own time to do things apart from each other, even if they were menial. It kept them from getting annoyed.

No matter how much they were friends or whatever they were classified as recently, they needed space. Always had, even at Wammys, and always would. Familiarity breeds contempt, as it were.

"Hey Matt, come here for a minute," Mello's voice rang out from the living room where he knew the blond to be seated on the couch. It hadn't been a request. Matt didn't mind.

He strolled out of the bedroom after pausing his game and continued until he stood behind the couch where Mello tilted his head back to look at him.

"I need you to hack something for me, will you?" Mello asked, gesturing to the laptop's screen which held something Matt was certain was illegal.

"Just like old times?" Matt asked, grinning as Mello's lips formed a smile.

"Yeah Matt. Just like old times."

And Matt didn't really care what it was he had to hack, just that he had an excuse to do so. And hell, Mello had asked him to do it, who was he to say no?

-End 20-

**AN**: DEATH TO SUMMER WEATHER! That is all I have to say.

**Special thanks**: Amour en Rayures, Gurgicalcipher, Aeleita, CMHerrera, killing u with umbrellas, CharizardCyndi, Zozabelle, Kari Twilight Mist, MsMattJeevas

thoughts?


	23. Part 21

Part 21

~Secret~

Mello had not had to do more than ask for Matt's help for the redhead to become completely absorbed in his work. Mello had always wondered if it had been because he had asked or if it were because it was hacking related, and Matt loved it. Or really doing anything illegal in general.

Mello had been working alongside the redhead for the last three days looking through any and all surveillance Matt was able to get his hands on the second he got it. They had started with the surveillance nearest L's building for up to a month before the reports of the men had ceased but had found nothing.

At least not until Matt had begun running all the videos into one of his programs and detected tampering in a few of them. Uncovering the real footage from under the layers of falsity was a bit trickier than expected and was taking time, so for the sake of not sitting around watching three seconds of footage every time it was debugged Mello had Matt look into anything around the former detectives' homes.

Mainly the routes where their houses met up with any store or traffic cams available; there were none any closer than that because of the residential areas. And if L had placed some of his own they were impossible to get a hold of.

There wasn't much in the way of activity on what they did have though. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary for the men, though it was difficult to really see anything in great detail with the grainy images. The footage was useless. And yet there Mello sat, going through it.

It was tedious and unfulfilling work having to find the men in the masses of people even with knowing their general schedules. However, on the off chance something came up, Mello would look through it as Matt hacked and recovered the others.

The silence, other than the taps of the keyboard, was comfortable to him. It felt almost like he was at Wammys back before everything had become complicated. But if being with Matt was considered complicated, than Mello didn't mind too much; he had never liked things easy anyway.

Matt was seated on the couch beside him, hunched over the computer with an unlit cigarette in his mouth. Matt never actually smoked around him anymore, and Mello hadn't even seen him smoke them outside in the past few weeks. He almost wondered if Matt had quit and merely kept the cigarettes as habit, though that seemed a bit unlikely to Mello.

Matt wasn't the type to torture himself with something he couldn't have. Not like that at any rate.

"Damn..." Matt cursed, and Mello paid it no mind until Matt's fingers had gone from the swift keystrokes into furious pounding. Something had gone awry. Mello paused the footage playing before him and peered at the screen on Matt's laptop. Though Mello made sure not to get in his way.

It looked as though something had glitched; pixels were breaking and scattering in the background as Matt streamed a line of code in the forefront, attempting to fix it or so Mello assumed. Mello couldn't do much computer wise, so he moved his gaze from the headache inducing code to Matt's face. He was much easier to read.

An eyebrow twitch meant he was surprised.

Lips pressed into a line meant he was annoyed.

And a frown meant something was unfixable or that Matt would soon destroy whatever annoyed him; it depended on the situation as to what that meant.

Mello guessed that the redhead's current frown meant that they wouldn't be getting the footage, the only leads they might have had in the case.

"I should have known. Damn I'm sorry Mello." Matt swore again, and though it seemed there was nothing to be done, Matt's fingers had hardly stopped their frantic movements. Mello wondered what Matt meant by 'he should have known'.

Known what?

"I knew there was layering on the film to hide the actual footage, but I never checked to see if there was any traps that would scramble and erase the stuff if anyone tried to get it."

"So the tampered film is tamper proof? Brilliant," Mello muttered sarcastically. He couldn't blame Matt, not really. They were dealing with L, and Mello had a feeling that Matt had forgotten that; normal criminals, having that level of video tampering already in place, wouldn't have added the extra safe guard if they would have even known how to.

"Don't worry about it," Mello sighed, "We'll find something else."

"Well... we still have fragments. And only because my program auto saves and backs up the progress to the hard disk." Matt said slowly, as though he were trying to keep a fight from occurring. Mello hadn't an idea why though; he'd already said it was fine...

"Can you pull up what you do have?" he tried instead, maybe if he ignored the small screw up then Matt would too.

"Yeah, just give me a second to get rid of this..." Matt gestured to the now completely frozen screen where not even the commands Matt had been typing in registered anymore. He waited impatiently, only to a slight degree, as Matt had to hard boot the laptop into restarting. It was slower in starting up, and the screen's color seeming dim to him.

From Matt's frown he hadn't imagined it. Mello wondered how much of the computer had been messed up, and remained messed up, from that one error.

Matt was silent as he pulled up a folder containing the video fragments and just as silent as he set them to play in some program Mello thought he recognized.

The first clip ended up being nothing of any real importance, just two task members entering the building with everything appearing normal, with the exception of the lateness of the evening. The next few clips were nothing more than distorted blobs, and it frustrated Mello though he tried not to show it.

His stomach had begun to bother him again by the time Matt got to the second to last clip. Mello froze, hand covering his belly, and leaned in as Matt dropped his cigarette.

"Jackpot," Matt mumbled, and Mello couldn't help but agree.

The clip showed Yagami Light being dragged from L's building, in handcuffs, by his father and two other task force members, the very same two that had entered the building sometime before. It was dated for the night before their supposed disappearance.

"Son of a bitch," Mello murmured. L knew about that, he had to. No one else could have done that to the footage. Even if Kira, Yagami Light, had the ability, he wouldn't have had the access after going on the run. Mello had Matt and they couldn't get into L's systems outside of the building.

Something more was going on then was being shown. L wouldn't have stopped hunting them for any old reason, so what had caused him to cease looking? Had it had to do with the Death Note, or was there something else, something that had occurred after the escape or breakout rather? For what reason had L covered this up? It was _huge; it was a clue to where they would find Kira._

Mello was certain that Yagami senior would stay close to his son after seeing him break him out of L's holding, but did the same hold true for the other task members? They had aided in the escape, but that didn't mean they would continue on the run with them. Separate groups were more likely. Maybe meeting back up later on? It was impossible to tell yet.

And another thing: L had covered up that he'd been holding Yagami as a prisoner, as well as the escape that had happened under his watch. Mello doubted it was to keep his professional pride intact. So why? Why hold back all of that information?

L had never brought his successors into this to capture Kira. It had never been about that, never, and Mello was only just beginning to see how much the Death Note had affected him. Though he wasn't quite ready to believe that L, a normal Death Note free L, would do all this.

Mello tapped his free hand, the one not occupying his belly, on his thigh as he thought. Yagami senior was a family man, that much was evident… but would he go as far as to contact his family after doing something like that? Or would he have told them beforehand? A letter or something? Or tell them directly?

"Matt we need to get in contact with Yagami's wife," he huffed out. The look Matt gave him said it all. _Are you crazy?_

"You do know that they have disappeared, right? Each and every family connected to the Kira case has vanished. And you want to contact them?" Matt stared at him incredulously. So it did sound a little insane and impossible, but so did a guy sporting a baby bump thanks to a notebook that killed people. Mello told him as much.

Matt snorted and shook his head. "OK, so if we can't find out where Yagami went, we find his or the others families? If there is anything to find…"

Mello didn't like how Matt had trailed off though he realized the truth of that statement. While things had spiraled out of control before and they had not actively followed up on the disappearing act the missing task force's families had done, they needed to do so now. They needed to speak with one or all of them if possible.

"So I guess we start with their last known appearance, the week before, and if it was stated where they were going?" Matt asked, making Mello smile. He wished Matt would let his intelligence show more often; he was so damn smart but was content on the sidelines. It had sickened Mello so many times in the past. Matt could have done so much better, but he had no motivation…

He sighed. There were many more things to think of than Matt's utter dislike of the spotlight. Like why the fuck everyone connected to this damn case seemed to drop off the face of the planet. Mello decided that he and Matt were lucky; so far they hadn't 'vanished,' and that was definitely a good thing.

"Mello?"

Mello looked over at Matt, his name having been called, and he blinked in surprise as the redhead took hold of the hand cradling his stomach and used it to pull him into a standing position.

"Let's take a break before we continue. We'll have plenty of time to solve this, but we can't if we get exhausted all the time."

Mello pursed his lips; he wanted to dive right into the investigation, and he knew Matt was only using that as an excuse, but despite that, he nodded. They _had been working nonstop for the last few days._

"You have an appointment tomorrow anyway." Matt grinned at him, and Mello frowned. Another appointment with the obstetrician? Just wonderful.

Matt patted Mello's stomach cheekily, and although it annoyed Mello to have his stomach touched, he smiled.

Damn he was getting soft…

-End 21-

**AN**: wow, 221 reviews? thank you!

**Special Thanks**: CharizardCyndi  
XxCatalinaxX  
killing u with umbrellas  
Aeleita  
CMHerrera  
MsMattJeevas  
Kari Twilight Mist


	24. Part 22

**Suggested Listening**: Midnight **by** The Birthday Massacre (chosen for a reason, but apparently I'm obscure with my musical reasoning. Pfft)

Part 22

_~Sleepwalking~_

After the incident with the surveillance footage, which Matt knew was his fault, things had gone downhill in the investigation. As they had begun to uncover previously, before the entire pregnancy issue, there was nothing on the detectives' families. It was literally as though they had just decided to pack up and leave without telling anyone where they were going. As noted in the police reports filed for the disappearances, friends and neighbors had stated that one day they were there and the next they just weren't.

The furniture was still in their houses and apartments, as was their clothing and belongings. Or at least most of it. It was impossible to tell if anything had been packed or not as no one knew the state of the dwellings had been in beforehand.

The deeper he and Mello dug into the case, the weirder things became. Missing detectives on the Kira case and notebooks that could kill people were strange enough, but not entire families missing and possibly the world's greatest detective at fault...

It was looking more and more likely that someone had either forced the families to leave overnight, or someone had silenced them, gotten rid of them, and Matt was more than willing to bet it had to do with L. Maybe not the L before the Kira case, but the one that had been affected by the notebook.

Everything fell back to that damn thing.

Matt sighed and leaned against the patchy off-white wall outside of the apartment, smoke trailing lazily from the cigarette between his lips. Mello was in the shower and Matt was using the time to smoke. He didn't smoke as much anymore, and though most would probably congratulate him, Matt wasn't all that happy about it.

He _liked_ smoking.

He just wouldn't do it in front of Mello anymore.

But he wouldn't complain. It wasn't as though Mello had forced that on him. Mello probably would have still let him smoke in the apartment had he asked, but Matt knew it wasn't good for the baby.

Matt heard the door squeak open and turned to see Mello's head poke out of the apartment, looking each way until he caught sight of him. Matt withheld a tiny sigh, dragged a large breath full of the poison and pinched off the end of the cigarette before tossing it to the floor.

"You don't have to stop; I was just wondering where you were..." Mello's tone was slightly subdued, the hormones marking their change in him once more. Mello got sensitive about the oddest things lately, things he normally would have just scoffed or rolled his eyes over. Mello hadn't gotten into any spontaneous crying fits, only once getting as far as furiously rubbing his eyes dry before throwing something across the room as his emotions turned to frustration, but he seemed to feel guilt and trepidation more often over stupid things.

"It's fine. I was done anyway." Matt grinned at the blond, and waited until Mello had gone back inside to look longingly at the dead cigarette. Oh well, he could sneak another one in later.

He found Mello plopped down on the couch, upon walking inside and shutting the door. He had asked Mello to take a break earlier, or rather that 'they' could take a break even though Matt had not needed one, and he was honestly surprised that after the shower, Mello had continued with it.

In fact, over the last few days he had been continually surprised by how much Mello let him get away with; from forcing him to take breaks to asking Mello to behave during the doctor visit two days prior despite knowing how sick Mello was of those visits.

Mello was trying, even though Matt knew he just wanted to throw himself into the case for the sense of normalcy it provided.

Mello looked up at him and raised an eyebrow. Matt realized he had been standing there, staring at him, for a few minutes while he had been lost in thought. He shrugged at Mello and simply sat down beside him, not knowing what else to do. The television currently displayed some channel, what looked like a cooking show, though Matt didn't really pay any attention to it.

Mello had repositioned himself with his back against Matt's side so that his legs could stretch out across the rest of the couch. Matt unconsciously stiffened at the sudden contact but slowly began to relax. He was still getting used to everything, still uncertain, but he liked the times when Mello did things like this, or when Mello was still half asleep and cuddled up against him, blue eyes fluttering open and closed.

He smiled faintly at the blond as he looked over, though he knew Mello's attention was on the show. Matt's gaze unconsciously traveled lower and settled on Mello's stomach. While not bulging, his stomach was definitely noticeable compared to what it used to be. The obstetrician had said Mello would be the type to not show as much, though he would still bloat like a balloon around month nine before they did the c-section.

Mello would stay relatively slim in comparison to other 'women'. It still hadn't made the blond feel any better.

Matt leaned down to kiss Mello's cheek, the blond in question flushing and looking at him in surprise, eyes blinking wildly for a moment before a smile broke out; and if their hands were hesitantly laced together, no one but them was there to see.

Matt wasn't certain for how long it would be before Mello got antsy and wanted to get back to the case, but he would enjoy relaxing with him until then.

.

.

"Damn it!" Mello swore, and Matt understood his frustration.

Yagami Sayu was the only person out of all the missing families to be found. She had been moved from her previous hospital and into one for more deeply disturbed patients and had been declared mentally unstable and suffering from delusions.

There was no way to get to her, not even to talk, they would need a _very_ good reason to see her. If they somehow managed it they would have to go in person and possibly alert L in the process.

"We're stuck again." Mello sighed heavily and harshly clicked out of her patient files. It hadn't been all that difficult for Matt to hack into them as they were in a database on the internet that was easy to control.

Matt sat back, watching Mello pace the room with a hand unconsciously resting at his lower back to ease the tension. There was something they were missing. There had to be. Why was L not concerned with searching for the missing task force members when they had knowledge of him and could expose his entire investigation if their minds were disturbed?

"Mello... what if we shouldn't be looking for anyone living?" he asked suddenly, sitting bolt upright in his chair. Mello stopped and stared oddly at him.

"And why would we not be looking for living people?" Mello asked, irritation still in his tone, but Matt knew it wasn't aimed at him.

"Pardon the overused phrase but: dead men tell no tales. What if L wasn't looking for them because one or more of them were dead? Hell, what if L-" Matt stopped himself though as Mello's eyes narrowed. He knew the blond still struggled with L not being who he had expected, still wanted to believe that he might have some good left, but with being in contact with the notebook for so long, Matt knew that whoever L used to be was probably no longer 'alive' for lack of a better word.

"Alright, so if L did have them killed, then what is the point of looking anymore?"

"Because we don't know. Who's to say they are all dead or that any of them are dead at all. But it's something to look into, isn't it? A new avenue we haven't tried..."

Mello had stopped pacing and stood, staring at him, before he nodded. "You might be right..."

"I am occasionally," Matt told him flippantly, making Mello smile.

"Yay obituaries," Mello sang sarcastically but still sat himself beside Matt.

Matt knew that it wasn't the way Mello had thought the case might go, all the witnesses, or escapees depending on one's view, being dead. But Matt also knew that every moment since he'd voiced his opinion, that it was gaining purchase in Mello's mind, the idea growing and taking hold.

Even if he was wrong, it was something to look into.

.

They started out with reported deaths, those of police officers. As expected, nothing had been found. At least nothing that had made front page of the news papers or television. What they had found, while not hidden, had been swept under the rug. Something that someone didn't want attention drawn to.

"Matt, they never even made it out of the area, never mind Japan!"

Ide and Mogi. Both of them found dead of blood loss in an alley hardly six blocks from L's building. The fact that L hadn't even moved since their escape and deaths spoke volumes of his mental capacity these days.

He was making mistakes, even risking his own exposure, and Matt wondered how long it would be before he or Near did something that got them identified. Or arrested at this rate.

"We can't be certain it was L's doing, though it's at least in the fifty percentile. They were traveling with four others affected by the death note, including Kira. Any one of them could have shot them." Mello sighed, eyes resting on the crime photos before him.

It was true. They couldn't know who had done it. L might have hired someone to go after Kira and the five officers that aided in his escape; hell, L could have gone after them himself. Or it could have been Kira or one of the other officers. But they were on to something for once. Matt almost hoped they wouldn't find more bodies...that maybe more people had escaped this mess... but somehow he was doubtful.

He and Mello were lucky. Almost too lucky. And it made Matt wonder if it was only due to how far L had fallen. If he and Mello's problem had happened around the time of Kira's escape, would they still have gotten away? It was unsettling to think about.

Matt's eyes joined Mello's on the photos.

Those two had never made it out of Japan. And it made them both wonder... had any of the others?

-End 22-

**AN**: er... rather late update but I come with excuses! First, beta was MIA for a week then I went MIA *work related* and well... its here now so :D

**Special thanks**: jamesmaslowfan07, XxCatalinaxX, iatethecookie, Possessed4evr, Aeleita, killing u with umbrellas, Kari Twilight Mist, Zozabelle, JStarLove, CharizardCyndi, MsMattJeevas

review?


	25. Part 23

****Suggested Listening**: Pins and Needles ******by** The Birthday Massacre; RENDEVOUS by Buck-Tick**

Part 23

_~Diary~ _

After finding out about Mogi and Ide, things concerning the case seemed to fit together like puzzle pieces falling in place; though it still irked Mello that the analogy reminded him of Near.

Looking through their deaths had turned up some startling results, things that Matt was currently looking into. Which, naturally, meant hacking into a police database.

And though his reaction to Matt's suggestion had originally been skeptical, Mello understood its value now, especially after finding another body, bringing the count up to three. They hadn't exactly been sure in the beginning if it was one of their men or not as it had only been in the news under 'an unidentified male in early thirties beaten and strangled to death.'

But it hadn't been too long after the deaths of Mogi and Ide, so he had asked Matt to look up the crime scene photos of it as well as the autopsy ones in case either set gave them an issue with identifying him.

Mello honestly hadn't expected anything from it, but to his surprise, the face was familiar. Mello had easily recognized Touta Matsuda, even with half of his face bashed in with gore and blood and the other half oddly puffed out and purple.

The report had stated that he had been found dead with nothing to identify him, no one coming forward when they had released the sketch, and the only thing in his possession other than the clothes on his back was a notebook with what looked like scribbles in it.

He and Matt had immediately thought of the Death Note, however they figured that L definitely would have tried to get it back if that were that the case; it was stated that the notebook was currently being held in an evidence locker.

The only good thing about that was the police had taken photos of the entire book and stuffed it into the online archive for easy access if something on the case came up. That was what Matt was getting then.

Mello wanted to know what it said, if anything.

Mello leaned over Matt's shoulder and grinned when Matt didn't tense at all. "You almost in?" he asked, watching blankly as the lines of code on the side disappeared and a smaller window popped up, prompting Matt either 'yes or no'. No was selected and, after a small 'blip,' a side tab to the open browser appeared, Mello knew next to nothing about what Matt was actually doing but figured it was according to plan as the redhead hadn't sworn.

"Hmm? Oh, actually I'm in now..." Matt trailed off, and Mello shook his head; Matt was more than distracted when he hacked sometimes. Matt probably wouldn't move even if the apartment fell down around him.

"Well grab the photos, and get out," Mello told him, resisting the urge to tap his fingers on something. He knew it was easy for Matt to hack things, as well as maintain the hack, and he also knew Matt was hardly a 'n00b' at this, but he didn't want to take the chance of getting caught in the system. It was as unlikely as him giving up chocolate, but Mello was paranoid given the circumstances.

"Yeah yeah, I'm on it. Give me a second," Matt mumbled, seemingly having only barely registered Mello's voice. Mello however knew better than to be offended. It was always like this when Matt hacked something and probably always would be no matter what status their relationship was.

Mello watched for the next few moments as Matt copied all the photos to his jump-drive and cut the hack's connection. "Sit down, and I'll bring them up," Matt told him. Not even asked, it was more of a command though it held no force. Mello narrowed his eyes and paused. He hated doing anything someone told him to, and he had been more than complaint with the redhead lately-

"Mello, don't be that way," Matt sighed out heavily, which only irritated Mello further. He sat down heavily and glared firmly at the screen, waiting for the redhead to pull up the aforementioned files. Why did it seem that Matt was acting as his caretaker? He was pregnant, not damaged for fuck's sake.

He huffed loudly when Matt grabbed his hand but made no move to yank it away. Distantly, Mello understood that somehow it was the influx of hormones that was affecting him, and perhaps that was the only reason he hadn't started an argument.

The writing, as it turned out, was written upside down, backwards and had numbers replacing some letters. It was a language Mello didn't automatically recognize, making it look like complete and utter gibberish to an outsider. Sure, had the police actually put some time into it, they would have figured it out, but they hadn't.

"I don't suppose you have a program that would instantly translate this, would you?" Mello asked dryly. Matt shook his head with a small smile.

"Nope. Looks like we'll actually have to do it ourselves. Maybe I'll make one after this so we won't have to do it again if it comes up," Matt said, grin widening possibly at the thought of making a new program. He left the folder open on the laptop, and Mello raised an eyebrow as Matt took the jump-drive from its port.

Matt stood, pecked him on the cheek and left him to it.

Mello smiled faintly. Matt really did seem to know what he needed before he did. This time though, the thought didn't bother him as much. Shaking his head, Mello set to work on his own, knowing that Matt would be working on the spare laptop with the very same.

It wasn't hard, just tedious, you had to find the values of the numbers. They weren't the usual 1 equals A and so on, but neither were they random placements used for confusion. Mello typed away, word by word, and slowly the sentences began to make sense. A scary kind of sense.

"Matt!" he yelled. He knew Matt had to have gotten at least half as far as him, and what he was reading...

Matt appeared beside him hardly a few seconds later, expression blank which Mello took to meaning Matt knew what he had called him over for. "How far did you get?" he questioned.

"Almost all of it."

Mello blinked in surprise at the answer but figured it had something to do with the numbers. Matt was good with numbers, had to be with his knowledge of computers. It made sense that he had finished it...

The writing in the notebook was not Matsuda's, of that they were certain, but neither was it Mogi or Ide's as it continued on past their deaths.

According to the notebook, Yagami senior had taken his son, along with the rest of the task-force, in a last ditch effort to free Light's mind of the Death Note's effects, hoping that no longer being exposed to it would sober his mind. However, things had gone wrong from the start as Light had protested in being removed from his cell, lashing out in a craze and injuring Ide.

L had taken notice, and after the escape, the task-force had gone on the run in two separate groups. Mogi and Ide had gone on their own, and only later on in the notebook was it described that news of their deaths had reached the remaining group.

Within mere hours of being ripped away from the Death Note's exposure, Light was having severe shakes and was feverish and muttering things, pleas for the book. The writer, who Mello believed was Aizawa, stated that he believed the notebook to be something like a drug, one that directly affected the mind in the worst of ways. At that time, it was obvious they hadn't known of the other effects the note could have.

Nowhere in the notebook had it mentioned them contacting or even thinking of their families. They probably hadn't even known they were gone, moved or killed by L.

It did speak of them moving from place to place, sleeping in the alleys and the like and just constantly moving, hoping to get far enough under L's radar that they could escape the country.

But it also spoke of the writer's belief on the growing paranoia in the group. They had all been under the effects of the notebook for a long time, Light worse off then any of them, and even the weeks away from it hadn't dulled the underlying mistrust of each other.

The very last pages had different handwriting, and it looked as though the new writer had attempted to write in the same code. It told of how Aizawa had seemingly run off one night and had never come back. It was dated a few days before Matsuda had been found dead.

"Do you think... it was Yagami that killed him?" Mello asked.

"I think that's more than probable. Aizawa mysteriously goes missing, and then Matsuda is strangled to death? Paranoia can do strange things to the mind, you know that well enough Mello."

So it was possible Aizawa had noticed the paranoia or his own had gotten too strong, and he had escaped to an unknown fate. It was also possible he had been killed before Matsuda. The notebook made it unclear as to the actual events, and it was impossible to follow the Yagamis after the notebook had been left in Matsuda's jacket.

Mello held no doubt that Yagami was the type to do anything for his son, and if he were slightly affected by the Death Note as well... anything was possible, even him following his son into the abyss.

One thing that was delete certain was that after Light had escaped L's place, no more criminals' deaths were reported than the usual oddity. Kira had simply vanished, and it looked likely, unless his and his father's bodies were found, that it would stay that way.

"So the case is kinda unsolved, isn't it?" Matt commented.

The case would _have to remain open until, if ever, the Yagamis were found. Mello wasn't sure if he liked that or not, but until more evidence was found, that was all there was. And judging from how long they had been on the run, Mello doubted there would be any news on them for some time._

And though it seemed that being away from the note's influence slowly brought ones mind and actions back to a more normal level, though still laced with paranoia, would it mean the same for L and Near with how attached they were to it? Mello knew he wouldn't be able to find them without exposing himself and Matt first... And he just couldn't do that.

Not for L.

Not anymore.

L had chosen to expose himself for the case, and he had gotten a crappy deal out of it, but it had been his choice. Had he not been pregnant and in a relationship with Matt, he might have gone after them; hell, he might have been in the nuthouse with them. But he wasn't, and there were just things he wasn't comfortable risking for his idol anymore.

And maybe it made him a bad person, but he didn't regret it and doubted he ever would.

He loved Matt far too much to do that.

-End 23-

**AN:** and there concludes the main portions of my secondary plot. XD back to the drama next chapter. This fic is coming to a close soon, around 10 or so chapters.

On other news for my birthday I just got a DN inspired tattoo. :D I doubt anyone can guess it and if you are too lazy to attempt I have a journal entry with a photo of it on my mangabullet account. :)

You can find the link to that on my profile, its my homepage.

Special thanks: jamesmaslowfan07, MsMattJeevas, Kari Twilight Mist, CharizardCyndi, amos222, killing u with umbrellas, Dee Elle


	26. Interlude: Thirteenth

**AN: **for those who don't know I posted chapter 23 here is your warning to go back and read. There was some issues with FFN that day *as well as the pages being spammed with.. 'fics'*

**Suggested Listening**: Loud Music by Michelle Branch

**Interlude:** _Thirteenth_

Mello had noticed that Matt had been acting a little strange as of late. Going out to smoke but being gone for longer than he should have, settling down to play games before bed only to be gone when Mello woke in the middle of the night. He couldn't figure out what was up with Matt, and to be honest, it had him a little worried.

Mello hadn't wanted to confront him on it, thinking it would make him seem distrustful, but after almost a week of it, he had had enough. Mello had hesitantly decided to ask Matt what the hell was going on; he just wanted to wait for the right time...

He finally caught the gamer as he got back in from going to his car after saying he'd left something in there, only to stop and look oddly at the boxes in Matt's hands. "Matt, what's that for?"

Matt blinked at him before snorting out a laugh. "You honestly forgot didn't you? This makes what, three times since I have known you?" Matt's features were stretched out into a large grin as he leaned down to kiss him. "Happy eighteenth birthday, Mello."

Mello froze. His birthday? It was December already? How had he missed that?

And suddenly all Matt's odd and sneaky behavior made sense. He couldn't outright go shopping with Mello nor tell him he was getting him things, so going behind his back would have been the only solution.

"Thanks, Matt." He smiled, watching Matt's expression soften a little.

Though by the time he had finished unwrapping his gifts, Mello was less inclined to say thanks. Mello knew he needed more comfortable and fitting clothing, as all the baggy ones had already become tight, but he hadn't wanted to get anything new, being unwilling to admit that he was fat, baby or not.

"I know that's not what you want, but you need them," Matt shrugged. Mello sighed with a nod. He did appreciate it despite hating the larger garments. At least they felt soft...

"I also got you this and a few other small things. Though perhaps you won't want it..." Matt held out a large bar of dark chocolate, which after seeing, Mello didn't even hesitate to grab. He wasn't getting any smaller with the baby still inside him, so a little more chocolate wasn't going to matter. Besides... it was chocolate!

"I'll always eat chocolate... even when the smell makes me sick." Lately, after he had entered the end of the second trimester, the smell of chocolate had begun to bother him to the point where he threw up if he wasn't careful. He could still eat it, just not smell it, so it wasn't completely horrible.

"What are these 'other small things' you mentioned?"

Matt grinned at him and disappeared into the kitchen to return with a small carton of eggnog and sweet pickles. Mello perked up instantly and made sure to kiss Matt before mixing the two together.

Matt winced and looked away as he devoured eggnog covered pickles, and Mello didn't blame him. When those damn cravings went away, he would probably be sick with himself for eating it.

Until then... he dipped another pickle into the heavy liquid and popped it into his mouth.

-End Interlude-

**Special thanks to those who reviewed**: killing u with umbrellas, MsMattJeevas, Kari Twilight Mist


	27. Part 24

**Disclaimer: **(in the event i forget to put these on EVERY chapter) I dont own DN or make money from it.

**AN:** i'm not going to even get into the reason why this hasnt been updated in almost a month. But it's here, so enjoy *sorry* :)

**Suggested Listening**: Everything **by** the veronicas

Part 24

~Stoned~

Matt had just stubbed out his third cigarette of less than five minutes and hesitated before heading back inside. It wasn't that he didn't want to go back in and be with Mello...well actually it was.

Lately the hormones, now thankfully in pill form rather than injection, had been making Mello's moods even more fragile and violent in their shifts. One minute, Mello would be perfectly content, laying on the couch with the laptop or watching a movie, and the next he was bitching about something or had gone completely stiff in posture. It was worse than Mello's usual temperament which was almost bipolar in complexity.

Matt wasn't blind, he saw and felt the heavy atmosphere that sometimes lingered between them recently, he just didn't know what to do about it. He couldn't decide what was causing it, knowing it had to do with more than just the hormones yet didn't feel that he could ask Mello about it...

If he even insinuated to Mello that he might be concerned, the blond narrowed his eyes and got defensive. Matt was unsure of what to do, so for the moment he'd decided to ignore it. You can't fix something if you can't find the problem. And Mello seemed full of them, Matt just couldn't find the source.

"Matt...?"

Matt saw Mello poke his head out from around the side of the kitchen doorway and waved a hand in response. Mello walked up to him meekly and pulled him into a hug, one that Matt was more than surprised to receive.

"Sorry... I know I've been messed up lately with the hormones but don't... leave, ok?" Mello had buried his face in the crook of Matt's neck so his words were muffled though still easily distinguishable.

Matt blinked. Leave? Since when was he going to leave him?

Oh god, this was one of those times he'd heard about in the books, where the hormones made the pregnant person act irrational and come up with insane things to worry about that really held no relevance to them, wasn't it?

Oh wait... that was Mello on a good day. He could handle it.

"Yeah, you are a bit of a pain in the ass, but you always were; the hormones haven't changed that much. I don't like you any less, I promise." He smiled at the blue eyes that stared down at him. It was easy to forget that Mello was actually a bit taller than him at times, especially lately.

He kissed Mello chastely, and when he searched the blond's face, he noticed it looking less like someone had just killed his puppy and more relaxed. "You're stuck with me, even when you don't want me," he murmured against Mello's lips, feeling them twitch into a small smile.

He wouldn't say it wasn't a hassle at times, catering to Mello's constant mood shifts, but he didn't let it annoy him. He planted a final kiss by Mello's mouth before pulling away.

"You were smoking?" Mello queried. Matt nodded and withheld a smile as Mello seemed even more relaxed, as though finally getting how off base his own thoughts had become. He would have to make sure that if Mello was in a 'mood' to let him know he was just outside smoking.

He'd rather not put Mello under more stress than he already was, even unintentionally.

Mello's stomach growled slightly, making the blond flush, and Matt smiled. "Let's go feed that stomach of yours, ok?" he patted the swollen belly gently despite Mello frowning at him. Things were getting more hectic, but then again, they always had been between them.

.

Matt was in the kitchen making coffee when it occurred.

He was shoved up against the wall separating the kitchen and living room and being kissed.

He knew it was Mello by the bump of his stomach pressing into him, so he refrained from pulling one of the kitchen knives on the blond.

Mello's hands roamed across him, under his shirt, fingers pressing against his skin as his lips hungrily attacked Matt. He tangled his fingers in Mello's hair and tilted the blond's head until he could clearly see his face though the kiss. Mello's eyes were dark and face flushed, and Matt could easily feel the erection that pressed into him.

Mello was horny, really fucking horny, and Matt didn't doubt it had everything to do with the hormones messing with him. But the kiss evolved as tongues became involved, and Matt knew that something was different this time.

"Hmm... Matt," Mello moaned quietly, lips breaking contact as his fingers easily undid Matt's belt. Their make-out sessions had been heavier as of late, but he hadn't connected it with anything special. Matt had forgotten the hormones could and would make Mello horny, more than he might usually be.

But Matt didn't mind. Mello was hardly the man from his past, and never would be even if Mello someday said those words Matt hated. He would deal with any feelings that might surface because of it. Mello had probably been so damn frustrated that he'd gotten fed up with waiting for something.

Mello's fingers came in contact with the skin beneath his boxers, and Matt's entire body shuddered. He kept his eyes directly on Mello, and the anxiety building slipped away. A few quick strokes, and he was hard and wanting; he just hoped Mello knew what he was getting into.

"You sure you want to?" Matt breathed. He was nervous and wasn't quite sure what he would do should Mello decide he was through and backed off.

"You already knocked me up, noting else to worry about. Now hurry up and touch me before I do it myself." Mello's rough command was all Matt needed to let his fingers roam the blond's body, hands pealing Mello's shirt off as he steered him to the bedroom. Mello may have denied any weakness due to the pregnancy, but they were not having sex on the floor or couch. Especially not for the first time they would actually be able to remember in the morning.

He had no problem pushing Mello to the bed though, watching Mello peer up at him though hooded lids and a hungry lust in his eyes. Mello didn't have to say anything more to prompt him. He wanted this. He wanted it almost desperately.

He was connected and attached to Mello in a way that he was with no other human being and knew from previous disjointed memories just how _good_ together they were. Hooking his fingers behind the band of Mello's pants he gently tugged them away from his body. He kept his eyes glued to Mello's face and watched as his lips parted as the tip of his erection was rubbed by the discarded fabric. Mello, even now, never wore boxers unless absolutely necessary.

Making sure he was properly disrobed himself, Matt crouched between Mello's legs and kissed along his erection, watching as Mello swallowed heavily, trying to keep control. Licking along the side of the shaft, Matt paid only the barest hint of attention to it before he moved on. He felt the blond quiver beneath him at the odd sensation as he kissed up his stomach and along his chest. Stopping at Mello's lips, he took the bottom one gently between his teeth.

He trailed fingers down Mello's side, pressing lightly into the blond's hip and making Mello arch into him, a soft moan on his lips.

"Enough touching more-" he silenced Mello with a kiss, loving the way Mello simply gave in quietly. He was certain that once the pregnancy was over and things were back to 'normal,' he would have a much harder time subduing the blond. Matt wouldn't mind the challenge.

They didn't have lube, or really anything in the apartment like lube, but Matt knew that so long as he was careful it would be pleasant. He hadn't hurt Mello when they had drunken sex, and he trusted himself far more sober.

He made Mello coat his fingers in saliva, gradually slipping them into the blond to prepare him. Matt was as nervous as he was aroused, but the absolute trust in Mello's gaze was enough to calm him. Mello didn't trust people blindly, never had.

He kissed Mello's cheek and carefully nudged the entrance, repositioning himself to get better leverage, as much as he could without straining Mello's stomach. He watched Mello's expression intently as he eased in, knowing Mello wouldn't tell him if he was being hurt too much.

There were small twinges of pain that stretched Mello's features, but nothing excessive. He kissed him again, rubbing a circle on the blond's hip as he let him adjust. It had felt like only seconds before Mello's arms were around him, yanking him closer.

He didn't need any more than that to know Mello was ready; Matt slowly set the pace. He wouldn't do anything harsh, if either of them would like to try something like that, until the baby was born. From the way Mello's eyes were shut tightly and he twitched beneath him, the slow pace was more than enough for now.

Matt loved the feeling of Mello's skin under his fingertips, beneath his lips, and under his tongue.

It was slow and teasing but no less passionate than slamming into him would have been. And the breathless cry as Mello came against their chests, muscles clamping down around him, was more than enough to assure him that Mello had enjoyed it.

Matt took care not to fall on Mello despite the feeling that he had been sucked of all his strength.

Matt smiled at him as they lied next to one another, breathing heavily in the afterglow of sex; and when it appeared he might move to hold him, Mello glared. "Matt, don't even think of cuddling me; it's too fucking hot."

Matt couldn't help the snort of laughter that escaped. Despite the not quite cliché after sex moment, Matt knew he would get used to it, could easily get used to it. Mello was everything in his life, always had been since he'd met him, and supposed he always would be.

He lifted himself to an elbow and kissed Mello, lightly touching his lips to the blond's in such a way that it had Mello reaching out for another. "I like you," Mello murmured against him, pulling away only enough to glance at Matt's expression.

It was Mello's way of saying 'I love you' without having to say it, which Matt appreciated. Matt knew Mello would eventually slip and knew he would just have to deal with it when it happened. Perhaps even get used to it one day…

Matt smiled and pecked Mello's cheek. "Like you too," he said truthfully, using his arm as a pillow and resting his head next to Mello's. Matt slowly dragged his fingers across the blond's belly and felt the small flutters from inside, knowing that it was their baby moving around.

He watched as Mello's expression changed into a slight frown. "It just feels weird. It's not really bothering me, just... weird."

"You mean just weird to have something moving inside of you. It's not like 'Alien' you know," Matt teased with a grin, loving how Mello glowered at him before breaking out into a smile.

"You damn well better hope it's not like the movie 'Alien'." And though it was said jokingly Matt knew both of them were afraid that it might be something like that, might be something odd, something supernatural.

"It'll be fine," he told Mello, not even sure if he believed his own words.

"I know." Mello took his hand, and though the conversation dropped, everything was comfortable.

-End 24-

**AN**: Now wouldn't that be a hilarious fanart to draw. Alien/DN x0ver XD.

**Special thanks to reviewers**:amos222  
XxHeartlessKissxX  
killing u with umbrellas  
CMHerrera  
MsMattJeevas  
Kari Twilight Mist


	28. Part 25

**Suggested Listening**: Kowareteiku Sekai **by **Girugamesh

_~Part 25~_

Mello blinked and yawned quietly in the darkened room. He was still tired and knew he couldn't have been sleeping for very long. Something had woken him; otherwise he wouldn't have been up until the sun had long since in the sky. As his eyes adjusted more to the dark, his entire body froze when a shadow moved in the darkness, hovering above him. He flinched, and Matt groaned against him. The shadow stilled until things fell silent again, and all Mello could think was 'L found us!'

"Matt!" he yelled and rolled onto him as the shadow lashed out. Staying still was a death warrant leaving no other choice but to wake Matt and try to escape. Matt was awake the second his name was called and noticed the figure holding the knife almost immediately after. Mello was thrown from the bed, somehow managing to stumble and only fall to his knees, and watched Matt hit the figure with a pillow before jumping from the bed.

Matt yanked him from the room, and Mello had no option but to follow. They were naked from sex, but it didn't matter to either of them. "Matt, what are you doing?" Matt had gone into the pantry and was looking for something, obviously something he believed would help, but Mello couldn't imagine what.

Mello jumped back and hit the countertop as a man he didn't recognize stopped in the doorway of the kitchen, which was lit only by a small light above the stove. His fingers flew across the counter behind him searching for something, anything to defend himself with. A kitchen knife found its way into his grasp and he held it out in front of him, hands trembling. Before he could blink a gun appeared in the man's hands; he had probably been told to make it quick to ensure the gunshots wouldn't prevent someone from interrupting.

The gun was cocked and aim lowered in the direction of his abdomen. Mello panicked, dropping the knife in a futile attempt to cover his stomach, fear seeping into every fiber of his being. With the knife clattering to the floor, he heard the only way of protecting himself vanish.

A frying pan smacked into the side of the man's head, and he toppled sideways. Matt hit the man again and again until there was a sickening crunch. The pan was dropped from Matt's fingers like it had burned him, and he was shaking, looking lost. Matt had just killed a person.

"That's the gun I bought, just in case. How long had he been in here? My God Mello, how fucking long?" Mello stepped over the corpse and hugged Matt's chilled body. "We can't stay; pack what you can carry downstairs in one trip. We leave in fifteen minutes." Matt sounded uncertain and pressed Mello closer for a moment before gently pushing him away.

Mello was still in a daze as he slid a shirt overhead and toed on his sneakers. He packed the games Matt had seemingly forgotten and shoved the flash-drives in with them, Matt already had his laptop in its case, so Mello just threw some clothing on top and closed the duffel bag.

Mello took one last glance around the place they had called home for such a short time and followed Matt outside, the fifteen minutes up.

Once outside, over by the Camaro, Mello finally spoke what he was certain was going through both of their minds.

"I thought we were being careful; how did he find us…?" because there was no doubt that it had been a man under L's employment. There was stony silence as Matt shoved their things in the backseat before turning to face him, eyes narrowed and angry.

"The case, Mello; it was the fucking case. We were under the radar until we started snooping!" Matt snapped and Mello recoiled. He had pushed for the case, had asked Matt to get the footage, to get a lot of things, and it had all seemed to go well... but he had brought L down on them.

Mello's insides seized, and he couldn't breathe. Matt could have been killed, the baby too, and it was all because of him. "Mello?"

Mello shook his head and tried to calm himself but simply could not; he felt things spiraling out of control until tears spilled heavily from his eyes and spots formed in his vision. He backed away from Matt's grasp until he hit the concrete wall behind him. He had... he had almost killed them, the exact thing he had wanted to prevent by letting the case drop!

"Oh shit, Mello. I didn't mean to yell. You need to calm down- Mello?"

Mello knew he was overreacting, hyperventilating in order just to breathe, but the thought of losing Matt squeezed his heart painfully. What if he hadn't woken up? That person had been aiming for his stomach, for the tiny life inside him. What if he had somehow survived and the baby had not? How the hell could he ever live with himself if they died because of him?

"Mello, please calm down, it's ok. We were stupid to think we wouldn't be found. Everything was just going so well..." Mello let Matt envelop him in his arms as he clutched weakly at Matt's shirt. Hands moved soothingly across his back, and Matt planted kisses by his ear and murmured things Mello didn't hear. Being surrounded by Matt helped. Matt was comfort, Matt was safety, Matt was the embodiment of everything worth while in Mello's life.

His gasping sobs dissolved into shuddering breaths, and only then did Mello feel the rain that had started pouring around them. They were both getting wet, really wet, and it was too cold to be out in the rain. They were lucky there wasn't any snow. "W-we need to go," he choked out.

Matt pressed a kiss to his temple and pulled Mello from his kneeling position yet still kept a protective arm around him; Mello appreciated it, needed it. "We'll be ok, Mello. You woke up, you saved us." Matt closed the backseat's door, and it hid the bags filled with their the remains of their apartment. To Mello it almost felt like that first night all over again, only this time he was closer to his due date, much closer.

.

.

Mello settled himself down on the bed beside Matt and closed his eyes as his chilled bones soaked up the warmth. Though he had taken a shower, he was still cold to the touch and felt very drained of energy. It was very early in the morning, somewhere around five-thirty, and they were in a hotel.

Sometime during the three hour long car ride it had been determined that the first thing in order of business was finding a hotel for the night. The second had been the decision to move to move into the same state as the obstetrician.

It wasn't far enough away from their old apartment for Mello's taste, but Matt had made a good point. They could move again once the baby was born. It was too much of a hassle to switch doctors when they had found such a good one. L should be expecting them to have moved and to be looking for another obstetrician, if L had even thought of them getting one. It was hard to tell what the man could be thinking when he had just sent someone to kill them.

"Alright, I figure we have a few hours before anyone checks their messages or emails so we should try to get some sleep. I could only find three renting apartments around here, the others are all houses for sale, and let's face it, we get enough grief over renting an apartment never mind trying to buy something." Mello nodded sleepily and wished that things could just be simpler.

Matt had started the second they had gotten settled in the hotel room, searching for available places in the obstetrician's area and then contacting the landlords. No one would be up that early, so Matt was only able to leave messages and emails. It was enough for one night though.

Mello grudgingly got up from the bed as Matt was putting his laptop into standby and tugged off the sweatpants he wore. No matter how cold he was, he couldn't sleep in those damn things. Boxers and a t-shirt would have to do. He flopped back into bed and curled under the cool sheets, waiting for Matt to join him.

He didn't have to wait long and was more than happy as Matt pulled him close. Matt didn't generally do things like that, and Mello had no doubt it had to do with the scare they'd had only a few hours prior. Mello was comforted by Matt's warmth and the beat of his heart so close. Curled close to the one he loved, Mello fell asleep.

-End Part 25-

**AN**: yeah... I seem to be updating ever 2-3 weeks with this one. It's not the beta's fault, just work, stress, health and me being a general lazy ass *paying more attention to the new ones i'm writing XD* hope it was worth the wait

**Special thanks to reviewers**: maili-chan, amos222, CMHerrera, MsMattJeevas, killing u with umbrellas, XxHeartlessKissxX

review?


	29. Part 26

**Disclaimer: **i do not own or make money from Death Note

**Suggested****Listening**: Connect the Dots **by** The Spill Canvas

Part 26

~Disarm~

Mello woke up and had to rush to the bathroom without a moment to fully process that he was indeed awake and not dreaming; but it was hardly an uncommon occurrence. His damn bladder was being squished by the baby, leaving him having to pee constantly. It was annoying, to say the least, especially as Matt seemed amused by it half the time.

Matt was awake and reaching for his goggles by the time Mello got back to the bedroom. The 'morning after' had none of the awkwardness that some people experienced, probably because it hadn't been a mistake or unexpected, and well, they hadn't had time for that after running for their lives the night before. The redhead smiled at him before crawling from the bed and stretching his limbs. Mello wasn't able to take his eyes off Matt's almost naked body until it was completely clothed.

He could easily blame the hormones, but Mello knew he would have done it with or without them. He couldn't help his attraction to Matt, and he supposed he didn't need to. He was, however, uncomfortable when Matt's gaze lingered on him. He didn't care what Matt said. He was pregnant, therefore fat, and not attractive in the least at the moment.

Mello couldn't wait for it to be born so he could do more than _very _light exercising and get his figure back. Mello rolled his eyes at the thought as it made him sound so much like a woman.

Mello was taken off guard when Matt strolled over to him just as he'd slipped on a pair of sweatpants-since he couldn't fit into his leather anymore even if he had packed it—and wrapped his arms around him. Matt tilted his head to kiss him, running hands along his back light enough that it gave him chills.

He had no idea what was going on in Matt's mind, couldn't find a reason for the sudden affection that had been so hard to get out of him before, and instead simply sank into the embrace.

The kiss did not turn hot or arousing but instead stayed what Mello might have called sweet if he were inclined for such things. All thoughts had fled his mind, and he had no idea how long they had stayed like that, but when they did pull away, Matt held a smile that Mello couldn't help but mirror. He still couldn't believe he was with Matt; it seemed too much like a dream, and he was almost afraid that he would wake up and be in L's building again with Matt sleeping across the room, away from him.

"Not that I'm complaining, but what was that about?" Mello asked, partially breathless.

"No reason, I just wanted to kiss you." Matt shrugged, and Mello shivered as the redhead's hands ran along his bare arms. Mello thought it might have been another way for Matt to comfort him, to subtly tell him they were alright, that being in the hotel and moving again didn't matter.

"You should get dressed, you have goosebumps, and sadly, they aren't all from me," Matt told him cheekily and moved out of Mello's reach.

Mello rolled his eyes, but now that Matt wasn't sharing his body heat Mello did feel the chill settle over his skin. Quickly throwing a t-shirt on and hesitantly grabbing a hoodie from one of the bags, he moved to stand by Matt.

"I was contacted by that Samuals person after we went to bed; if we have the first month's rent—and we like the apartment obviously—we can move into it tonight; only we wouldn't have any furniture until he can get it out of storage. It's also in a slightly better area, I think. He didn't tell me the reason the other occupant left." Matt shrugged, and Mello nodded. They couldn't be picky. They needed an actual place to stay. A hotel couldn't provide them with all they wanted.

"I'm thinking of installing an alarm system and maybe a few cameras, even if our stay ends up being short..."

"It's a good idea." Mello did not want a repeat of the previous evening. Thinking back on it, he had no idea about Matt's thoughts on what he had done, had done to protect them. Instead of voicing it, he draped his arms over Matt's shoulders and hugged him from behind. He was so close that he was certain Matt could feel his heartbeat against his back.

"I'm sorry you had to do it, but I'm not sorry he's dead." Matt trembled under him and Mello didn't look to see if Matt was crying or simply shaking. Matt needed to let it out however he could, and all Mello could do was be with him.

.

.

The apartment hadn't been too bad, a hole or two in the walls, but the rest of the place had been immaculate. It kind of made Mello wonder if someone had gotten murdered there and they had needed to clean the place up; he was almost willing to bet that the furniture wasn't in storage either.

They had taken the apartment though. If they waited, there was no guarantee it would still be available. Mello had barely paid any attention after that, feeling a little odd suddenly and opting to go back and wait in the car. He had probably overdone himself in the last few hours.

One thing that still nagged at him was if they could get the security system put in or if the landlord would have an issue with it. Matt could probably find a way to do it himself, but Mello wasn't certain how long that would take. How long would Matt want to stay in a hotel? How long before they had to switch hotels?

"Hey Mello, everything is all set. He said we aren't the first to ask for security, but the only ones who could pay for it. Too bad he doesn't know I'm adding a few other things..."

Mello smiled and another weight was lifted.

"It will still take a few days, but we can stay at the hotel. We will just have to find foods we can make in the microwave that won't drown us in sodium." Mello winced a little as Matt started the car and rubbed his stomach. Something didn't feel right. It was probably nerves. That had to be it.

The nagging feeling that something was wrong kept up for a good ten minutes until an unimaginable pain struck Mello. He gasped, unable to keep the feeling non-vocal. The pain started in his stomach and seemed to go straight through him to his back. It was like a knife carving him apart from the inside. He let out another louder and noticeable gasp as the sharp stabbing pain shot through his groin area.

"Mello?" Mello couldn't answer, realization and fear coursing through him. It wasn't coming from his stomach but from what resided in it.

"Matt, I think something's wrong with the baby. Fuck it hurts!" he breathed out painfully and hunched over, hands on his stomach though he knew it wouldn't help. Mello heard as Matt called the obstetrician, voice shaking and blurting everything out.

Mello rested his head on the cold window and tried not to focus on the panic he felt or the pain rushing through him. _Hold __on, __just __hold __on,_ Mello kept telling himself.

"-and you'll meet us at the hospital? Thank you-"

Matt was speeding, phone held up to his ear by his shoulder as he weaved in and out of traffic. It was late afternoon, and Mello could see everything as it passed by the window, the forms blurry from unshed tears.

"Matt! Matt, I think I'm bleeding!" Mello had felt cold in that area for a few minutes before a biting pain had hit him again and the feeling of something soaking into the fabric of the clothing he wore drew his attention. He had touched the fabric and his fingertips came back red. Bleeding was not normal and was _not_ good.

"W-what if I'm mis-"

"Don't even think it, Mello!" Matt snapped and blindly grabbed one of Mello's hands. They couldn't lose the baby, not after everything done to keep it.

Matt didn't bother to park normally and stopped at the main entrance where he screamed for help. Mello felt himself being moved into a wheelchair to be pushed through the hospital doors and into the building, which smelled strongly of antiseptic.

Mello couldn't focus on any one thing as the doctors got at him. It was all a blur of faces—people he had never seen before—and none who were Matt. He hoped desperately that they had let him in, he really needed him. Things were happening so fast and the next thing he knew he was being told his clothing needed to be removed. "What? No you cant-" he should have been paying attention to what the doctors had been saying rather than worried over where Matt was. They wanted him in hospital garb and wanted to check things he didn't have, it would be impossible to explain. They would never listen to him.

"Excuse me! Move out of the way-" Mello recognized the voice and swore in relief as Patricia, their obstetrician, came into view. She spoke in a hushed and hurried voice, and Mello noticed the surprise in some of the gathered faces. Imagine the surprise if they knew he had always been a guy.

Mello had to explain what he was feeling and what happened numerous times; they pressed and felt his stomach and did a few other quick tests and concluded he was in preterm labor. It was too soon. More than a month too soon.

Mello was given a drug that was supposed to help stop the contractions; if it didn't work however, he would have to go into surgery—and soon—to get the baby out. The blood and fluid discharge had only been a small amount, and it had been from the onset of the labor. Mello didn't care what it was from so long as the baby was alright.

Matt stood in the doorway, having been allowed in after the situation had been explained by Patricia; she really was a great help. How many obstetricians would willingly do all that she had done for them without being asked?

Matt immediately took Mello's hand as he sat beside him. "I'm sorry I couldn't get in earlier."

Mello shook his head. It didn't matter.

Every few minutes someone came in to check up on him and make note of any changes; there was only so long they could wait for the drugs to work, and Mello was worried.

"Everything will work out. You just need to stay calm." Matt smiled at him, and though he was visibly worried, it helped. Matt was right, Mello just wasn't certain if he could get himself to comply.

They waited what seemed like hours but, in reality, had only been a handful of minutes until the pain had finally lowered and the contractions stopped. It wasn't known if they would start up again or not. Mello was in that gray area where surgery could still be needed, but for the moment, he would just be monitored.

Stress had caused it. Or more than likely had been the cause.

Mello could see that. He really could. Who wouldn't be stressed after nearly being murdered in their sleep and knowing that the world's _former_ greatest detective was hunting you down?

The more stressed he was, the more likely this could happen again. Stress on the 'mother' was always very detrimental to the fetus.

Mello frowned. He would have to stay overnight at the very least. And he was on bed rest for a few days afterwards, complete bed rest, to make sure no more stress was added to the already tenuous situation.

Matt was the one told this of course, as though Mello wasn't even in the room. Patricia smiled knowingly at him as the doctor left. She had stayed the entire time to know the outcome. "Call me if you need anything else, ok?"

They really had picked the best when they found her. Mello would never regret staying close.

"I guess we better get comfortable; it's going to be a long night," Mello sighed and wondered how the hell he was going to fall asleep in that bed made of stone.

.

.

Mello sat in the wheelchair impatiently as his information was processed, so he could leave. Of course it had nothing about Matt, Mello, or either of their real names on it. Sometimes he forgot he was supposed to be someone else, and it created an awkward moment of silence when he didn't reply right away. Mello had other things on his mind than another alias.

Drumming his fingers on the arm rests, Mello huffed out an aggravated sigh. Couldn't they hurry it up? He was the only one at the desk, and he was noticeably pregnant; didn't that count for something?

"Here you are. Just sign this, and you can be on your way."

With a barely contained snarl of 'finally!' Mello snatched the clipboard and signed whatever name was listed on the patient information and handed it back. "Let's go."

Mello looked pointedly at Matt, who sighed at him yet complied anyway.

Matt had parked his car the afternoon before when they wouldn't let him in, so Mello grudgingly stayed put while Matt brought it around. He had no problem easing himself into the passenger side once it was only a few feet walk however.

Mello took a deep breath and was more than relieved to be out of that place. Matt pulled out his phone while they were at a stoplight, and Mello listened in curiously until he caught the words 'we just checked out' and 'thank you'. Matt was talking to the obstetrician.

Matt laughed a few minutes later as he said goodbye, and Mello motioned for him to continue. "She told me you remind her of her niece, and that's why she can't help but want to make sure you are ok."

Matt's grin was infectious, and Mello smiled too despite being compared to a girl, again.

"I guess it's a good thing." Matt agreed and switched on the radio. Mello pulled his jacket around him more fully and stared out at the snow-less scenery. It was close to Christmas, and he hadn't gotten anything for Matt yet. Regrettably it didn't look like he would get the chance to either, not for a while.

If worse came to worst, he could order online. It always felt so cheap to do that though; he knew Matt wouldn't care, but that wasn't the point. Mello's hand settled on his stomach, and he let the drive go on in silence until they reached the hotel.

They took the elevator up, and Mello was more than happy their room wasn't too far down the hallway. Mello kicked off his shoes and after a quick stop at the toilet, removed yesterday's clothes and switched into something comfortable. Matt gave him a look that suggested that he shouldn't be on his feet. Mello rolled his eyes as he slipped into bed; he didn't mind so much now that he was out of the hospital. The prolonged bed rest would probably bother him after another sixteen hours like this, but for the moment it was alright.

"Want some decaf tea, Mello?" _since __you __sure __as __hell __aren't __getting __anything __with __caffeine __in __it_, was left unspoken though Mello heard it loud and clear anyway.

"Sounds good. Thanks, Matt." If it was that or plain water, Mello would choose tea even though he hated it. Matt disappeared to use the microwave which was only a few paces away in the hotel room.

Mello felt a tiny kick from inside his stomach and flinched. He rubbed at his stomach slowly and calmly as the baby became active after being still for so long. "You can't do that again. You need to stay in there a little longer, ok?"

Mello took a deep breath and forced the lingering worry from the forefront of his mind. The baby was in no danger for the time being, and he wanted to keep it that way.

-End Part 26-

**AN**: um... long time no update? My fault. I was being super lazy and just writing writing writing and work. I am almost done, just the epilogue left, of another 25+ chapter fic and about to start 3 more... Next on my list of updates is Dog Days final chapter, and im almost done with Flaw 27, sending out 28 to the beta soon. I will try to keep on top of updates but i promise nothing, i will however tell you that it will be completed and not abandoned especially since its is a finished fic.

**Special thanks (to those still following me XD):** EndlessStorm  
gabichocomello135121215  
XxHeartlessKissxX  
MsMattJeevas  
killing u with umbrellas


	30. Part 27

Part 27

~Oops~

A week later Matt found Mello attempting to get dressed, but unable to find a shirt. Matt had gotten them moved into the apartment on schedule, or at least mostly, which left Mello sleeping in the hotel as he got things set up. Mello hadn't exactly been allowed to do much more than change clothes—which Matt had left out—or go to the bathroom for the last few days.

"Matt, where did you put the shirts?" Mello hated having to search for everything; he knew it would get easier and that once things were fully organized again it would be fine, but it was pissing him off at the moment

"The bottom left drawer." and there they were. Rolling his eyes, Mello pulled one on, finally able to finish getting dressed. Stretching, he blinked as the sudden hunger that crept upon him. He hadn't noticed it before, but he was _starving_. Heading into the kitchen, he waited impatiently for Matt to notice him.

"What can I do you for?" Matt called, his head sticking out from the refrigerator.

"Grab the pickles from...well wherever they are and the mustard and cream cheese," Mello replied, already opening the loaf of bread from the counter. Just as in the bedroom, nothing was organized in the refrigerator. Mello would rectify that later on.

Matt didn't say anything as he placed the items next to him, and Mello decided that he hadn't connected that all of them were going together on the same sandwich. Though for his sometimes random cravings, this was tame. He didn't get cravings all the time, but when he did, he followed them. Otherwise it drove him nuts.

Mello smelt bacon frying up before he'd even noticed Matt had taken it out. Glancing over, he noted how Matt had added two eggs beside the bacon and shook his head. Bacon was all well and good, but Matt ate it like four times a week.

If the cigarettes didn't kill him, all that grease would.

Not deciding if he was satisfied with his creation, Mello moved everything to the tiny kitchen table with a napkin as a plate and began putting together another one while he continuously glanced at Matt. He had just finished making another sandwich as Matt sat down, pouring ketchup over his plate like it was the first time he'd had it in years.

Mello added another pickle to the sandwich, and more mustard as an afterthought, ignoring Matt's look of utter disgust as he bit into it. He couldn't control what he craved, so he went with it. It wasn't like he was asking Matt to eat it too.

"Mello really, that's fucking gross."

"Then look away. Tastes great to me," he grumbled, purposely tearing off another piece as the redhead watched, eyes seemingly transfixed on the concoction. Mello likened it to a train wreck: you don't want to see it, but you just can't look away.

Matt gagged and finally removed his gaze. Mello tried not to feel amused. He failed and smirked into the sandwich. Mustard dribbled out the sides and his tongue went out to catch it. He wrinkled his nose at the taste. It was only good when combined with the cream cheese he decided.

He ate a sandwich and a half before deciding he was finished. Mello took one last pickle out and covered it with the hot mustard, eating it as he put everything away. He leaned on the counter afterward and watched as Matt quickly ate his meal as though it was safe now that he had finished.

"You know, Matt..." Mello trailed off, waiting until the redhead had looked to him, bacon dangling from his lips as he pulled the fork away. Mello sighed.

"Mello, I know that look; don't close up now that you have my attention," Matt grumbled, stabbing his eggs a little bit too roughly. Matt never had liked to be bothered whilst eating.

"No, never mind. Just finish eating and I'll-"

"It's about the baby, right?" Matt cut in, grinning at him in a way that suggested he'd figured everything out.

"I can't be that obvious…"

"Yeah you can. I doubt you even know you're doing it, but whenever you're thinking of it or something about it you place your hand on your stomach." Matt's grin stretched across his entire face as Mello looked down at his stomach. His hand had unconsciously migrated there. How had he never noticed that before?

He glanced back to Matt who had finished eating and was looking expectantly at him. Mello shook his head and leaned further back into the counter, grudgingly keeping his hand positioned as it was; it would be too much like admitting defeat if he were to remove it.

"I'm not sure why we haven't thought of this before, but we need to get clothes and a crib and well, we need everything we don't_ have _for the baby." He watched Matt's eyes widen and knew he wasn't the only one not to think of it at all. It was probably a good thing since they wouldn't have been able to take anything they had bought for the baby with them when they fled.

"I'm not sure we can even really make an excuse for ourselves," Matt commented with a shrug, as though they were speaking about the weather.

"Yeah, yeah we're stressed, forgetful idiots. Now can we get to the part where we get our lazy selves to the store to look for this crap? Or at least shop online if you've decided to have a sudden onset of agoraphobia," Mello snapped. Matt's eyebrows had shot up, and Mello had almost felt bad for snapping at him when he was kicked _hard_ in the bladder. He must have made a face as Matt's expression turned to one of slight concern as he asked if he was ok.

"Yeah, just fine until you're spawn decided to kick me. Now I have to piss," he grumbled, trying to decide if it was safe to stop rubbing his stomach to calm it, though he honestly had no idea if it worked. It made him feel better, so Mello supposed it didn't really matter.

"What a good baby. You know when Mommy is being crabby." Matt grinned widely as he spoke, and though Mello had the urge to smack him, he didn't. Maybe he was right. Though the idea was flawed as the baby was the reason he was crabby.

"If you think you're up to it we can go shopping, but if you start getting tired, you need to take a break. You know what the obstetrician said," Matt reminded him.

_As though I need any reminding,_ Mello thought bitterly.

From what he was hearing, he'd be practically bed ridden for a while compared to his usual level of 'activity'. But it was all to prevent any more complications since his frame wasn't meant to handle a baby; that and after the scare they'd had, Mello would do whatever was asked.

Mello understood all that, even agreed with it, he really did, he just didn't have to like it.

"Fine. We could stop for lunch or whatever. Let's just get going before the baby decides it's time to kick anything else."

Though to be honest, the baby probably wouldn't kick him until later when he was trying to sleep. Once the motion stopped, it would be wide awake and causing trouble. It looked all fine and tolerable in the baby books, but it was nothing to actually being woken at two in the morning by a nice whack to ones innards.

God did Mello hate being pregnant sometimes.

-End part 27-

**AN**: i'm on a roll arent I? You are going to want me sick all the time as all I do is edit XD.

**Special thanks to reviewers**: MsMattJeevas

Possessed4evr

killing u with umbrellas

XxHeartlessKissxX

Kari Twilight Mist

**review**?


	31. Part 28

**AN: **im not dead yet, I swear. XD. I hav had stuff back from the beta for a while... but I got stuck on a few edits, and then health issues, stress, work stress and a bit more than writers block. I think im ok now? Maybe? More updates soon as I have my mello helping me :D

also, at the end of the the chapter I will put a summary of the fic I will be posting after the flaw is completely posted.

**Suggested Listening**: Last Piece **by** .heidi (rather difficult to find their stuff sometimes but well worth it)

Part 28

_~Boycott~_

Matt stared at all the baby stuff and wondered just what they were supposed to choose. A lot of the products looked the same, some cheaper than others or with different colors and shapes, but _all _with the same functions. So what was the difference?

_Was _there even a difference? It was all making his head spin and as he glanced over to Mello, it seemed he was also at a loss. "Should we just throw things in the cart?" Mello stared at the items for a long moment before shrugging, hair flopping over his shoulder, confirming he had no idea either. The stray hair was irritably shoved back over his shoulder as Mello fiddled with the fake strands.

Mello had on a medium length black wig and was sans anything black clothing wise. Instead, he begrudgingly wore a blue maternity shirt that stretched over his stomach and a pair of jeans, stretched at the top for pregnancy. He certainly looked the part.

Matt had gotten used to 'dressing up' so they could go out, but the brown wig he wore made his scalp itch and he hated that he didn't have a single stripe on him anywhere.

"Maybe we should have just gotten everything online," Mello muttered, turning over_ something _in his hands. But Matt couldn't agree less. "It would be harder to find things. At least in stores we can look at them and pick them up, not that we have any idea what the difference between half this crap is anyway," Matt told him.

Mello sighed, hand going to support his lower back; he tilted his head to the side to survey all the items before them. It was a large section comprised of baby foods, cups, bottles, clothing, nappies, bibs, and everything else you could imagine minus the toys and furniture. There was just so much to look at...

Matt picked up a set of glass bottles, only two in the package, and wondered if there was a large difference between using glass versus plastic. He knew plastic tended to stain as well as retain smell so with that in mind he carefully dropped the glass ones into the cart.

"One down ninety-nine to go," he heard Mello mumble.

"Should we just get the immediate stuff or things for a few months; the baby is going to grow quick after all?" Matt asked, scratching his head.

"I think the first few months, that way we won't have to go out for much. Probably for just the formula and diapers." Mello told him absently as he squinted a little to read the fine print on a package.

Matt figured that was the best way to go about things, though really they were winging it. There wasn't really any booklet that could help you with shopping. It was more trial and error and user preference when it came to those things as well as 'studies' that really never helped.

Hell, it might have helped if Mello was female. Didn't they have a better sense about these types of things? But Matt doubted he'd have the relationship he did with Mello if he were in fact a _she._ Just the thought of Mello as a chick made his skin crawl.

"Um excuse me for intruding, but is it your first pregnancy?" a brunette woman came to stand just to the left of Mello who had whipped his head to look at her, nearly dropping the package of binkies from his grasp.

"Yes it is," Matt supplied, knowing Mello was more than uncomfortable just from his posture alone.

"I thought so. I know that look. I had it too when first shopping for all the little necessities." The woman had a wide, bright smile, and it was only then that Matt noticed a smaller, but no less noticeable, bump of her own. "Do you by chance need some help? You looked a little lost."

"Um, please?" Mello asked quietly, which surprised Matt. The woman smiled at them as she began to show them the little differences in just the things they each held. Though she was very friendly, it made Matt a bit uncomfortable.

"How far along are you, if you don't mind me asking?" Amy, as they found out her name was, asked as she took one set of binkies over the other, saying something how most babies preferred them over the other kinds.

"Nearly eight months," Mello told her and Matt couldn't understand why the woman looked surprised.

"Really? You hardly look six, never mind eight. I'm in my fifth month and already bloated like a whale," Amy laughed. She stayed a bit longer to explain what was better than most and what was said to be safer if a bit more costly.

Matt knew they would probably need to put their researching skills to a different cause when they got home, but he wasn't worried nor was he annoyed. It was simply something required of them apparently.

After leaving that store—everything packed into the back of the car—Mello seated himself gingerly into the passenger seat and looked wearily at him. "We still need a crib and a few toys."

"We can always do it another day; there's still time-"

"No, we should do as much as we can now and get everything else online. I know we'll come up with excuse not to go out," Mello sighed, sounding as tired as he looked.

"Lunch first, no objections," Matt told him. And the fact that Mello didn't protest said how tired he really was. Matt would force him home if Mello didn't recover his energy after resting a while. It always surprised him how easily things took away Mello's energy these days and knew it would only get worse over the next month the closer they got to the c-section.

They had a quick lunch at some drive through burger joint, sitting in the car and enjoying being off their feet for a while. Matt had finished first and was thankful he'd brought the laptop as he used it to see if any places nearby sold cribs, as the store they'd been at didn't.

He found a Babies R Us in the area and Map Quested the directions. It felt so odd to be looking something like that up, and wondered if it would ever feel normal to him.

Mello was fairly silent the entire way there and even into the store—especially in the store. Matt figured it had to do with the way people stared at him. He didn't know what it was, but everyone seemed to look at pregnant people a lot. And with being in hiding, every long glance was a little unnerving.

"Matt, do we even have room for something like this today with everything else we bought?" Mello asked suddenly as they arrived in the correct area, as if the thought had only occurred now. It figured that Mello would worry about that after they were in the store.

"I don't see why not. It's not like it comes pre-assembled," and damn if Matt didn't wish they did.

"Let's just pick one. I doubt one of these is better than the other, I think it's all about style and price," Mello said, more than hinting that he was ready to call a quits to the entire day but being too stubborn to actually say so. And yet despite what he'd said, they ended up taking a fair bit of time to find one; mainly because Mello hadn't liked the color of the wood or it wasn't expensive enough so there must be something wrong with it.

Matt didn't honestly think it mattered as they would probably be sick of looking at it every time they had to see it at four am.

They had ended up with a cherry wood crib with some blue and white striped bedding. Girl or otherwise, it didn't seem like Mello was going to tolerate many pink or purple accessories in the apartment. Not that Matt wasn't grateful, but maybe they should have found out what it was? At least it would save on them calling it 'the baby' all the time.

The last thing they had looked for, after having previously gotten small rattling toys and such, was a plush one. Mello hadn't protested when Matt had found a tiny red-furred dog and stated shopping done with.

It had been a trick to get the large crib box into the back seat, and it had only been managed with most of it sticking into the front. Mello had hardly been pleased, but it was that or sticking it on the roof, though Matt did not have any ties for that to happen.

The drive back to the apartment had been uneventful, unless one counted Mello having fallen asleep eventful, and had left Mello in the car as he carried the majority of their purchases inside. He had only woken Mello as he'd needed him to move so he could drag the crib out.

Thankfully the elevator in their apartment complex worked, though it made odd clanking sounds and jerked to a stop more forcefully than he thought it should. Matt wouldn't have been surprised if he got stuck in it with the way his luck ran. However he was happy that he hadn't or he had a feeling he'd have been carrying Mello and the crib up the stairs once he was free.

As it was, Mello had kicked his shoes off, tore the wig from his head, and flopped down onto the couch as carefully as he could. Matt looked at the stuff they had gotten for all of three seconds before joining Mello. None of it was perishable and could wait another day to be put away.

.

Hours later, after they'd eaten and were seated in front of the television, Matt knew one subject that desperately needed to be brought up. "Mello, we haven't thought of a name."

It wasn't that either of them had forgotten about that—more like acknowledging it made it real. Sure all the cramps and weird food cravings, ultrasounds and baby bump made it real, but a name was final. To decide on a name was to accept they were seeing it through and were going to become parents. Something he knew neither of them had wanted to dwell on recently, having too many other problems to get through first.

He felt Mello stiffen next to him and an odd look settled over his features as Matt looked at him. "Yeah we do need a name."

To Matt it almost seemed as though Mello was hesitating, stalling, but for what reason Matt couldn't fathom. "Maybe we should have gotten a baby name book...then again the internet is just as good for ideas," he stated, watching Mello's expression carefully. It was almost like Mello had something in mind but was afraid to share it for whatever reason.

"For a girl perhaps something like... Isabella?" Mello said quietly, face directed away from him. Matt turned the name over in his head. It wasn't anything odd like Mail or beautiful like Mihael was, but it was a good name. And the more he thought of it, the nicer it sounded. It was probably better than most anything they would have found in a book to start off with.

What Matt didn't get was why Mello hadn't said anything about the name before he had brought up the need for one; it didn't sound like a spur of the moment decision. "What made you think of Isabella?"

"It was my mother's middle name," Mello stated carefully, and Matt understood why he'd been hesitant. Instead of commenting, Matt kissed him. "I like it, it's a good name."

"But what happens if it's a boy?"

Mello smiled at him and relaxed into his arms when prompted. "I guess we need to keep thinking then," Mello shrugged but made no move to leave his arms in search of the laptop.

They might not have had everything they needed for when the baby came, but for now, it was enough.

-End Part 28-

**AN**: uh ohh they still haven't picked a boys name! Bad parents! XD *at least they aren't picking one of the most 'popular' names of the time like mine did. URGGGG If I wasn't such a lazy ass id go change my name XD*

summary time :D

**For the Sake of Being Normal**:"And do you, Mihael Lucian Keehl, take Samantha Eleanor Richardson as your lawfully wedded wife?" Mello stared into Samantha's soft brown eyes full of love and excitement, her lips contorted into a smile most would have called beautiful with her full and painted lips, and then his eyes moved down to their lightly clasped hands. "I do." And with that, he could literally feel his life slipping right through his fingers. Complete. Sent to beta for edits.

**Special thanks to reviewers**: BrooklynBabbii , killing u with umbrellas , MsMattJeevas , Kari Twilight Mist

review?


	32. Interlude: December 25th

**Interlude:** December 25th

Mello had thought long and hard about what to get Matt for Christmas. He hadn't wanted to only get him games as that was expected, and Mello certainly wouldn't buy him cigarettes, so when the idea finally came to him, Mello wondered why he hadn't thought of it immediately.

He wasn't certain if it would be a success or not, but it was something different, something Matt would not expect and something they had already said no to before; though to be honest, they had been a bit overwhelmed at that point in time.

Matt was engrossed in a game in the living room which left Mello time to snatch his cell phone and lock the bedroom door to make the call; it was picked up after only two rings.

"Hey Patricia, it's Shane. I was wondering if it would be possible to schedule my appointment for an earlier date, sometime before Christmas?" Mello knew it was a long shot; in all likelihood, she was probably booked until after Christmas, when his original appointment was.

"If you don't mind me asking, is there a specific reason for it?"

Mello bit his lip and was grateful no one was around to see him as he fell victim to a blush. "Well... I wanted to do something different for the holiday and if possible, I would like to surprise Mark with the gender of the baby. I know it's really short notice-"

"I think that is an excellent idea. As it happens, I have a cancellation for the day before Christmas at eight thirty. I'll call Mark to tell him that I'm taking my vacation early so I moved up all my appointments. How does that sound?"

Mello grinned. It had worked out better than expected. "That sounds great, thank you." The call lasted only a few more moments as Patricia had the information entered into the computer and discussed a way to keep Matt from the room when she told Mello the gender and formally put the information in an envelope for Matt; Mello left the bedroom feeling content.

Mello was almost certain Matt would enjoy that gift along with the expected games he had ordered online. Mello hadn't been apart from Matt long enough to buy something whilst shopping for the holiday decorations, and they had only gone out once for that. And if something else was needed, Matt usually went out on his own with the hint that Mello stay rested.

It had made getting any gifts impossible.

Mello watched as Matt answered the phone and hid a smirk as he sat beside him. To distract himself, Mello turned his gaze to their small tree that sat off to the side of the living room. It was hardly what Mello remembered from Christmas with his family, but he and Matt didn't need a big tree, not yet, maybe when the baby was older...

"Mello, your appointment has been switched to Christmas eve."

"Why?" Mello turned to Matt appearing curious if not a little concerned; he was pleased with his acting. "She's taking an early vacation," Matt shrugged, and it was easy to tell Matt didn't mind the change. It wasn't like it was in the evening so they still had an entire day to get things ready for Christmas. There was no inconvenience.

It was still a few days away, but Mello could hardly contain his excitement.

.

.

Mello had woken early on Christmas, his bladder screaming at him. With business taken care of, he snuck the inconspicuous string envelope under the tree before Matt could get up; last thing he needed was for Matt to find his hiding spot. Mello also didn't see the need to wrap the envelope when Matt's games were wrapped in oddly shaped boxes and covered in reindeer covered paper; he had enough things wrapped already.

He had thought about going back to sleep, but in the end, he had quietly dressed himself as he put coffee on for Matt and hot chocolate for himself. It was cool in the apartment but not uncomfortable enough for Mello to put on a jacket or hoodie.

He sat at the kitchen table while the water heated for the hot chocolate, the mix already in the cup. It was early from what Mello could tell, the sky being gray and murky before the sun rose. Upon closer inspection though the clouds seemed bloated and ready to burst, but with rain or snow Mello wasn't certain. He left it as a surprise, forgoing the weather station, figuring he would find out sooner or later. Mello hoped it was snow but didn't count on it as there had yet to be so much as flurries that year.

Hearing the microwave finish, Mello hurried to stop the chime and winced when he heard movement from the bedroom. He should have closed the door. With a sigh, he fixed a cup of coffee for Matt before he added the hot water to his cocoa mix. He had just finished adding a splash of milk to the cup when Matt's groggy 'Good morning... Happy Christmas' came from behind. Mello returned the sentiment before he got a good look at the redhead.

Matt's eyes were squinted as he shuffled along the floor, and Mello smiled at the sight. He didn't bother with pleasantries and thrust the hot cup into Matt's hands and steered him into the living room to sit on the couch. Mello joined him a moment later with his own beverage and sipped it gently as he waited for Matt's mind to join his body.

Mello noticed it immediately when Matt yawned and set the coffee down to stretch his arms in the air, spine popping back into place. Matt turned and placed a kiss to his lips with his eyes wide and awake.

"Nice to see you finally all here," Mello smirked.

"Yes well, if you could stop shifting in the bed every five seconds than maybe I could get some sleep," Matt told him gently with no ire, though it made Mello wince nonetheless. He hadn't known it had woken Matt. He just got so uncomfortable at night and couldn't seem to lie in the right spot.

"Should we wait to open our stuff?" Matt distracted him for the moment, and Mello allowed it. He thought on it and shook his head.

"No, we can eat breakfast and start preparing for dinner after." That was all it took for Matt to hop off the couch and dive at the gifts. Mello laughed and let Matt sort everything out into two piles. There wasn't much stuff, but that didn't really matter much to Mello. They could go out and buy what they wanted whenever they wanted; it was mainly just tradition and opening the secret gifts that made it fun. It was always nice to be surprised.

Matt moved all the gifts onto the coffee table and sat next to him again. Matt handed over a strange rectangular and rather heavy box that Mello eyed curiously for a moment before he tore at the wrappings. It was a lock box with the key in the lock.

"Not finished; you've got to open it."

Mello rolled his eyes and did as told. Inside was a photo album. Mello hesitated only a moment before pulling it out. The first page was filled was candid photos of himself, one from Wammy's and the rest of him from sometime in the pregnancy. Matt had even managed to snatch one of him poking his stomach when he had first started to show.

Mello looked up and couldn't seem to form words. "I figure Kira has his own problems, and if he isn't dead or out of his mind, he will be in hiding and far away from a Death Note. And if L finds us, the Death Note will be the least of our worries."

Mello stroked the soft bindings of the book and smiled. Having photos would be nice. "Thanks Matt. I hadn't even thought of this. It has just been so ingrained in my mind not to have them." Matt seemed pleased with himself, and Mello let him have it; he had been surprised.

Matt made to open the envelope, and Mello had to shove a box in his hand to keep him from it. Mello tucked it behind his back for safe keeping until the end and laughed at the half pout Matt shot his way before he turned his attention to the other gift. Matt's eyebrows had shot up, and he bounced in his seat waving the game around for a second before pulling Mello into a heated kiss.

"Damn Matt, if I knew you would act like this over a single game, I would have bought you a new system instead."

Matt grinned sheepishly and handed over a smaller but no less heavy box to him. It was filled with things they couldn't quite use until the baby had been born, but once he was in top shape, they _would _be used. "Kinky bastard," Mello muttered and watched as Matt's cheeks burned red. It was a large show of how Matt felt for him that he would even think of something like oils, lubes, and _toys _after everything that had gone on when he was little.

"Open the last two boxes you have." Mello grinned at the look of suspicion he received. It was only a few more games, nothing perverted like Matt's gift had been; though Mello would be lying if he said he wasn't eager to try a few of them out.

"Yay!" Matt was grinning ear to ear as he added the other games to the pile. Mello was actually surprised Matt didn't have them yet but conceded that there had been other, more important things to think of recently.

"Thank you, I loved my gifts." Matt seemed to have forgotten about the envelope, and Mello didn't remind him, opening his last gift instead. Mello laughed, glanced at Matt, and laughed again. "In your dreams, Matty, in your dreams."

"Couldn't hurt to try could it?"

Mello snorted and set aside the item, which he vowed never to wear, something black with a bit of lace, before sobering up. Matt looked at him expectantly. It seemed he hadn't forgotten the envelope.

Mello shyly held it out, and Matt took it with uncontainable curiosity. Matt unwound the top and scanned the document.

"You sneaky bastard! That's why Patricia had me run the blood work over to the lab for her!" Matt grinned at him, and then it seemed to sink in that in his hands were pictures of their baby, their _daughter_. Matt sucked in a breath, and Mello let him have a moment.

Mello had been a little overwhelmed when he found out in the office with Patricia there; he hadn't thought he would be affected by it and had blinked his misty eyes clear hurriedly before Matt had a chance to get back.

"This is… this is... just thank you, Mello." And Mello knew he had given Matt the best gift he could in that tiny envelope. Mello sank into the offered embrace, and they stayed like that until Matt's growling stomach became too much for Mello to tolerate.

"Alright. Let's feed you before your stomach grows legs and does it for you." With help, Mello got off the couch, and the two went on to start the rest of their holiday.

-End Interlude-

**AN:** oh look, another update XD. Shocker right?

**Special thanks**: MsMattJeevas , Miharu is Haruka's Love Child , XxHeartlessKissxX , killing u with umbrellas , Kari Twilight Mist , gabichocomello135121215

review?


	33. Part 29

**AN**: takes place after prologue

**Suggested Listening**: Have Faith in Me **by** A Day to Remember

Part 29

~_Wait~_

Mello sat irritably in the chair, wishing to be able to move around and do something more than a half hour cleaning spree. The baby weight caused strain on his back and feet, so too much standing, no matter what he was doing, bothered him.

The cramps had gone as well as the nausea, and though he became fatigued by seemingly small amounts of work, he felt the best he had for the entire pregnancy. He supposed it didn't really matter as in just over a week he'd be going in to have the c-section to get that damn watermelon out of his stomach.

He was partially excited as well as nervous and... a little afraid. Mello wasn't sure what would happen if there were clear signs of it, her, being supernatural. Of being the Death Note's. He wasn't sure he could go through with the promise he and Matt had made in the beginning.

And what scared him was he wasn't so sure Matt wouldn't. They hadn't spoken about it since then, so Mello didn't know the redhead's thoughts on the matter, and there wasn't a good time to bring it up. It didn't exactly make a good dinner conversation.

Mello flinched at the sudden kick to his stomach and was thankful it hadn't been his bladder. He frowned and rubbed at the spot, silently willing her to behave in there. She was probably as hungry as he was.

The only thing that was really left in the house was his chocolate though. He frowned at that, realizing that he hadn't really eaten much of it in the last month. "Stupid pregnancy," he grumbled quietly to himself. If anyone, he was allowed to be a little annoyed. But there was a silver lining. Since he hadn't eaten much chocolate, it meant that there would be plenty once he was baby free.

There was a crash outside the apartment that had Mello's eyes zero in on the door and tense as the knob was tried and a low curse expelled. But he relaxed once the jingle of keys and the lock turning was heard. He highly doubted that a burglar or someone there to kill him would use a set of keys. Mello cocked his head to the side in thought.

He supposed it _was_ possible. But less than point one percent.

He raised an eyebrow as Matt stumbled into the living room, bogged down by bags and what looked like an apple rolling behind him. From the harried look on the redhead's face, it was best not to ask.

Matt took a deep breath, stuffed a cigarette in his mouth and stalked out of the apartment and shut the door as an afterthought. Things had apparently not gone well shopping wise, but Matt had never really liked shopping for anything other than games anyway. And with Mello being forbidden by both doctor and boyfriend from going on those trips, Matt was left to do it on his own.

If both of them weren't so paranoid of L or Near finding them, they would have simply done the grocery delivery, but it was a pain enough getting packages from the stupid P.O box and perishables wouldn't deliver to something like that anyway.

He rubbed at his stomach again and contemplated going to see if Matt was ok when the door opened, albeit quite a bit slower this time, and Matt scuttled in, looking sheepishly at him.

"Sorry. I just really needed a cigarette after that..."

Mello just shrugged and gave him a small smile. "You brought junk food right?" he asked in what he hoped was a nonchalant tone, but from Matt's disapproving frown, he'd sounded too eager.

"Yeah, I got us takeout. Jeeze, you act like eating a few fruits and vegetables are killing you."

Mello snorted. It was hardly a few. He actually made an effort—bar the cravings—to eat somewhat healthy for the baby. But every once and a while, he wanted something that didn't look like a garden had puked all over it or that he had to take pills with. So sue him.

"Don't look that way, Mello; your face might get stuck like that." Matt commented as he pulled free two foot long subs.

Mello heaved himself out of the chair and went to inspect the meal. "There is lettuce on it," he grumbled and shifted the sub around to see what else was on it, though it didn't appear anything other than the veal and sauce was there.

"Yeah, and it's covered with tons of calories so deal with it." And even with the goggles over his eyes, Mello could see Matt's 'Mello's-bitching-over-nothing-again' expression. Which Mello supposed he was, but it was lettuce! He hated that stuff...

Matt turned and kissed him on the cheek randomly before he settled down to eat his own food. There were bags of groceries littered on the floor around them, and Mello, probably despite Matt arguing, would help put them away after lunch, which he ate slowly as he knew it was the last 'unhealthy' meal he'd get for the day. It wasn't exactly bad not to eat what was suggested, just frowned on.

Two more weeks, he thought, just two more weeks. And then he could eat as much unhealthy foods he wanted until he puked. And chocolate. Definitely more chocolate.

"Hey, why does it smell like bleach in here?" Matt paused, sandwich hovering by his mouth.

Mello shrugged and dutifully looked at his food, picking bits of lettuce off as Matt sighed. And as Mello snuck a glance, Matt gave him a withering look.

Mello grinned coyly and leaned over to kiss him. It was hardly the world's best kiss, especially with that hot mustard lingering on Matt's lips, but it had seemed to placate Matt for a few seconds. At least until he had pulled away, looking exasperated.

"You can't kiss me every time you do something you're not supposed to and expect me to cave."

Mello grinned. "Sure I can." He moved around the table and seated himself in Matt's lap carefully, pressing their lips together. He heard Matt sigh again but felt as Matt's hands came to tangle in his hair, one sliding down to support his back.

Mello had often wondered if Matt had only been humoring him in the beginning—agreeing to be with him because of the baby-not knowing how to deal with the situation they were thrust in, his horrible past experiences, and emotions he had never intended to deal with. But the little moments like this wiped all the doubts away.

And maybe they had gone a bit fast in certain parts of their relationship, but Mello thought it worked well in the end.

Matt's hand slid up his shirt to slink along his back, the sensations causing an almost instant erection and a sudden willingness to forget about the food for a while longer.

-End Part 29-

AN: Next part, the big day :D and after that the epilogue. Now, im undecided as to what i'm posting first. Radio Nowhere or For the Sake of Being Normal. I'm not going to rush my first beta-who has the first parts of FTSOBN-but i have the first chaps of RN ready to go from my second beta...yeah i have so much stuff i couldnt shove it all on one person, it would kill them XD. If the other beta is not ready when I am, i might post RN and put it on hiatus once i get the other one in... if you have an opinion feel free to put it in a review but dont review just for that, you can pm me.

**Special thanks**: quarterxqueen ,MsMattJeevas , harlequindreaming ,XxHeartlessKissxX , CMHerrera , Kari Twilight Mist , gabichocomello135121215 , Razorblade Devotchka , killing u with umbrellas


	34. Part 30

So, something different in this chapter, the little scene breaks are actually POV breaks.

**Suggested Listening**: So Obvious **by **Runner Runner

Part 30

~Mine~

They hadn't really needed to hear the doctor explain how after being given the anesthetic, which would leave Mello awake if his condition permitted it, they were going to cut him open and get the baby out. Well, Matt was certain it had been explained in far more technical terms, but that was the gist of things.

Things they had already known.

There had been nothing else explained that they hadn't been able to discern and drudge up on the internet or from books on their own. He knew it was a courtesy and that not everyone would know these things, or even look them up, but to him if he were going into it, he'd almost not want to know. Though one would have to be an idiot not to realize what was happening.

The procedure for the C-section had been explained the week before, at the final checkup before birth. Which was going to happen as soon as they were done making final adjustments in the OR.

He knew Mello was nervous, knew everything that could potentially go wrong, and he wished he had been able to ease his fears, but Mello had already been wheeled in to be prepped. Matt had already done his part in dressing in the horrid pale green surgical clothing, cap included, and was waiting.

He was just outside the OR, and he pushed through the doors once he had been waved inside.

"Hey, Mello," he greeted softly, feeling awkward speaking in the clinical silence as the surgeon and others conversed.

Mello twisted his head to look at him, weary smile tugging at his lips. They had been up all the evening before.

"We are ready to begin."

He gently took Mello's hand as he noticed his body tense in response to those words. Mello was already drugged up so he shouldn't be able to feel any of what they were doing—hopefully. There were always the horror stories of it wearing off too soon or not taking complete effect, but there didn't seem to be a problem despite the constant glances at Mello; Matt figured it was to see if Mello was feeling anything. It was a scary thought.

A few minutes later, there was movement of the doctor as he peered around the divider blocking sight of Mello's stomach. Matt was sure he could have watched, but he'd seen enough videos of it online and knew Mello appreciated him being closer to him anyway.

"Congratulations on your baby girl. Would you like to cut the cord?"

He glanced at Mello who looked slightly startled by the lack of crying as a notification of 'birth' despite knowing not all babies cried the second they were free.

Detaching his fingers from Mello with a small smile, Matt shrugged, taking hold of what looked like an instrument of torture and cut through the squishy material. He couldn't honestly figure out what was supposed to be so great about doing that. He didn't get any great sense of accomplishment from it or anything like that... some people were just odd he guessed.

Neither of them had gotten a good look at their baby before she had been whisked away to be cleaned, but no one had screamed or gasped in horror so he figured that was a good sign. Knowing he would have to wait until the nurses were done and Mello had been sown up, he gave him a quick kiss before he was ushered from the room to wait.

He tore off the stupid hair cap he'd had to wear and couldn't wait until Mello was out of there so he could change in the room provided to them as he wouldn't be allowed to leave for a few days. Both doctor and Obstetrician's orders due to his odd pregnancy.

He got that Mello didn't like it, but it would give them some time to get used to taking care of the baby.

Matt knew he hadn't had to wait all that long, but with the clock ticking on the wall and the hallways silent yet busy, it had felt like hours before Mello was being wheeled out, looking tired and weak on the bed.

Matt followed them without prompting, and they were told the nurse would be bringing their daughter in as soon as everything was set. It wasn't exactly like in the movies all the time where the parents hold their baby in the OR and the credits begin to roll. Sure, had they protested, they could have easily had time with her once she'd had a quick cleaning, however it made more sense to have her taken care of before Mello got to the room.

As it was, it took nearly another twenty minutes before the nurse wheeled the see-through plastic crib into the room with the baby wrapped up in a cocoon of blankets. "Anytime you don't want her, just call, and we can handle her while you rest or eat."

Matt nodded, and though he had not seen Mello, he was certain he had too. "Matt-"

He knew what Mello wanted, the same thing he did. He peered over the small bundle and hesitantly brushed aside a few pieces of the blanket that had hidden her face and hair.

.

.

Mello waited anxiously—shifting as much as he dared despite the anesthetic and pain killers running through his system—for Matt to react. His worry only rose when Matt didn't say anything and instead simply picked her up and brought her over.

Mello released a breath as she was placed in his arms.

Pinkish skin, closed eyes, and a small tuft of red hair was exposed, and he looked up at Matt who smiled at him—a relieved smile. There was no outward appearance of outside tampering, they couldn't say for certain but to Mello, Isabella was theirs.

"I still say they look like aliens," Matt commented as he rearranged the pillow behind his back for him, and Mello appreciated it as his arms were full. He let out an amused snort at the comment despite sort of thinking Matt was right. He continued to simply stare at her sleeping face, almost in shock that everything had worked out alright. He couldn't say who she looked more like, the features too scrunched and new, but so far it looked to be in Matt's favor with the red hair.

Mello had never thought he would have a child, never mind literally birth one, and certainly not with his best friend turned boyfriend. But Mello wouldn't trade it for anything, and it looked as though L and Near were wrong; their baby was definitely theirs and had nothing to do with the Death Note, though Mello still couldn't shake the doubt from his mind entirely.

Apart from looks and future behaviors, was there _really _a way to tell? Maybe they had been deluding themselves from the start? Though Mello liked to think that everything had gone the way it was supposed to.

He didn't know for how long he'd held her, but his arms felt like lead, and pain was starting to twinge from his stomach to his spine.

"I'll take her," Matt told him with a smile and gently took their daughter from his arms. "Get some rest. It will probably be the best damn sleep either of us get in a long time."

Mello groaned out a small laugh but knew it to be the truth. "Thanks, Matt." He slid a bit further down, trying to make himself comfortable on that stone slab of a bed and closed his eyes, smiling as Matt kissed his cheek before going to sit down off to the side.

He was so damn tired, even though he had hardly done anything. Rest was what his body needed to recover from the surgery, so Mello didn't protest as he felt his mind slipping in the silence of the room.

.

.

Matt cradled Isabella in his arms as he watched them both sleep; though Matt thought she would be waking soon for a bottle or something. Everything was completely changed now that she was finally here, but it was a good change. Mello could get off all the pills he'd been taking and would definitely be in a better mood...

Matt didn't know what the future entailed for them, and he didn't rightfully care. For now they were safe and happy but worrying about anything else was useless.

Sunlight filtered in through the blinds, and had Matt looked down as the baby opened its sleepy lids in annoyance, he would have caught the glint of red in her blue eyes as the light was reflected in them.

-End-

**AN**: Bwahahah, what an ending right? So yeah, it was in part essence of the notebook, but it is also Mello and Matt's. Wonder what evils will be released now XD

There is a small **epilogue** after this so stay tuned.

Review?

Special thanks: gabichocomello135121215 , Kari Twilight Mist , killing u with umbrellas


	35. Epilogue

**Disclaimer:** i do not own death note or make money off of it

**AN:** this is the last chapter, i hope you enjoy.

-Two-

"Mommy!" the little redheaded girl screamed, running across the lawn until she had been scooped up into Mello's arms, Isabella squealing in delight.

Matt could remember the very first time their daughter had called Mello that; Matt had had to stifle his laughter by clamping a hand over his mouth, nearly doubling over in mirth as Mello stared shocked at the toddler. Mello had tried numerous times as she had gotten older to explain to Isabella that, although he'd given birth to her, he was a boy. She was smart for her age, but even so, she was only three, and it had lead to comments of 'Mommy's a boy!' that had confused some of the neighbors. Matt had gotten a kick out of it; Mello... not so much.

The evening sun was setting after a long day of letting Isabella run amuck in the park. Matt tried his damnedest to ignore the red tinge her blue eyes held against the gold sun. He and Mello had noticed it after a few weeks, when her eyes had stayed open for more than the bottles nipple to be placed in her tiny mouth.

L, though potentially half crazy and affected by the notebook, had been right at least in part. While she was most definitely his and Mello's daughter, she was also the notebook's. She was something supernatural.

Neither of them knew what it might mean for the future, if she would start showing signs of aggression or violence or something worse, but for the moment, she was just a normal child.

And though they had promised, swore until they were blue in the face that they would kill her if she showed signs of not being completely human, they couldn't do it. She was theirs.

No matter what happened or what she did.

_Isabella was their miracle..._

"Papa!" the little girl struggled in Mello's arms and pouted when she couldn't get free. Matt strolled over with a small grin, his cigarette already in the trash, and planted a kiss on Mello's mouth before greeting his daughter who was carefully patting the small bump forming in Mello's stomach.

He and Mello shared a look as her eyes flashed ruby, but they did nothing more than hold her hands and swing her between them as they began the walk back to their apartment.

_...and they would do whatever it took to protect Isabella and her unborn sister._

-End-

**AN**: how's that for an ending? XD


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